dealing with misscarrage and deployment :(

[rafwife2011]

my fiance is just over half way through his tur but wen he was back on his randr i feel pregnant i didnt tell him cos wanted to wait till i had been drs got it confirmed ect and when i got it confirmed i woke up the next day excited to tell him and was in crippiling pain.
before i knew it i was in hospital being told i was no longer pregnant
how do you explain to someone you had a mc if they didnt know you were pregnant???

this is the hardiest thing iv had to do i hate keeping secrets from my fiance but i dont know how to tell him or even if i should

please help xox

 

[T'elle]

aww sorry to hear that hun, just tell him the truth that you wanted it confirmed because of this exactly, that you wanted to confirm the pregnancy and that you were going to suprise him x

 

[Marlarky]

Oh wow that's really hard, im sorryy

Well, i think you really really should tell him. That baby was half his.. but don't talk to him until he comes home because you don't want to tell him something like this over the phone..

Start off by telling him how much you missed him and everything you want to tell him and then tell him that you have something you have to tell him.
But don't make it sound like you were unfaithful or something, it's all in your tone.

Then just tell him that you got preggo and that it didnt work out. I'm sure that he will comfort you.

Then you can comfort eachother and spend time together with the Love of your life!!


Goodluck&&hang in there!!!!

 

[rafwife2011]

thanks girls i know i should tell him, its a baby we had been trying for for so long and iv tried to keep a brave face and stay possitive and happy but then relised this is a site i can just let it all out.
im hoping he doesnt resent me after telling him thats the thing i know we can try again, but...
is it normal to bleed sooooo much after??
not being crood but im having to change ever 10mins. x

 

[hb1]

how long ago did you mc? If you are filling a pad every 10 mins I would get to the Dr's - can't hurt to get checked.

I hope it all works out with your oh and so sorry for your loss

hx

 

[rafwife2011]

was a week ago and its not just a pad its two super pads and im still bleeding through im going drs tomorrow i think its driving me mad and the pain is unbareable

thanks for the help meens a lot and im sure we will be fine wer a strong couple just want this tour over with now xox

 

[#1onway]

Hi,
I dont think your partner will be upset with you for not telling him and whether you tell him now or when he is home depends on how you think it will effect him and how he will feel about not being able to support you in person. My husband works away (although not in the forces) and i had bleed last wednesday (to my knowledge i was still pregnant). I didnt tell my husband because i knew he would worry excessively and he would be unable to come home and feel very guilty for not being there for me. I went on to have a scan on the friday and found out i had lost the baby (i was 12 weeks). I did decide to tell my husband at that point after speaking to the head office of the company he works for and they arranged for him to come home. I know your circumstances are very different but i just wanted to reassure you that i believe he will understand.
Also about the bleeding, did you have any medical interventions? I had the tablets on tuesday and for two days i was unable to control the bleeding, after i passed the baby and placenta the bleeding became more of a heavy period. I am still bleeding now but have been told not to worry unless it continues for more than 10 days

Hope you have plenty of support and im really sorry for your loss x