Delayed Ejaculation

[butterfly36]

I am also dealing with the same problem. My husband has delayed ejaculation. we did not know what it was until a couple of months ago. Thank goodness we have a 4 1/2 yr old girl but we've been trying to conceive another baby for about three years and we just thought that there was something wrong with us. Now that we know what it is my husband saw a Dr and he has an apt to see a urologist to make sure it is not something physical. We are considering doing an IUI because I am so frustrated already and scared because I am already 36 and I want more kids. What are the chances of getting twins with an IUI? Is taking clomid safe and is there a better chance of having twins if I taking clomid? I also saw a few people on this forum did a home semination. Is that safe?

 

[ArticBaby]

My dh use to have this problem before he started adding zinc tablets.

Now he is a MORNING PERSON, if you know what I mean

He still plans on seeing a urlogist soon about his low sperm count.

 

[tryhardmummy]

Hi gals & guys,

Well we had a very close call. I ended up having a chemical pregnancy back in April. We were able to do it by my husband finishing himself and then inserting at the last moment.
A bit of a logistical nightmare but never the less we were "pregnant" for about two weeks.
Anyway, I have waited a few months and now it is back to the drawing board this weekend. Fingers crossed for me.
Hope you all find sucess.
Its extremely emotional at our house sometimes. Its a fine line between wanting a baby, not putting too much pressure on your hubby and the guilt they feel, then you feel. Many tears had privately, its kind of a silent sadness.
I am still keeping positive.
Congrats Amy. Awesome news.

 

[pluto]

I am also dealing with the same problem. My husband has delayed ejaculation. we did not know what it was until a couple of months ago. Thank goodness we have a 4 1/2 yr old girl but we've been trying to conceive another baby for about three years and we just thought that there was something wrong with us. Now that we know what it is my husband saw a Dr and he has an apt to see a urologist to make sure it is not something physical. We are considering doing an IUI because I am so frustrated already and scared because I am already 36 and I want more kids. What are the chances of getting twins with an IUI? Is taking clomid safe and is there a better chance of having twins if I taking clomid? I also saw a few people on this forum did a home semination. Is that safe?

hi Butterfly, my DH also has this. I am waiting for the fertility clinic to send me out a apointment. Getting all my bloods done this cycle and DH is getting a sperm analysis. i think we will probably go down the IUI route, although my GP gave me the name of a therapist aswell so might try that aswell-although not looking forward to that and haven't rang her yet-keep putting it off! I'm 38 so feel I have to try all things as am running out of time!! Am going to try see if we can do self insemination this month aswell-tried one month before but wasn't using OPK and DH hasn't really been keen on a repeat try but hoping I can persuade him this month. fraid I dunno what the chances of having twins is-if I find out I'll let you know.! keep me updated on your progress -its reassuring to have other people in the same boat.

 

[AnneG]

Hi everyone! I'm new. I just came across this forum, and am so relieved that I'm not the only one with this issue. It feels good to know that there are other people going through it, and I can now have someone to talk to!

I've been married for just over 3 years, and my DH has had this 'condition' the entire time. Besides that, the rest of our intimate time together is great... it is just the ejaculating inside of me naturally, that seems nearly impossible.

Have any of you guys had any positive outcomes with either some sort of treatment for delayed ejaculation, or with getting pregnant while your guy has this condition??

I'd love to hear about it, or hear ANY advice.... we are just starting to try to conceive and I sure hope it is a possibility for us, since this is an issue.

Thanks!

 

[merle]

I am so glad I found this thread! We have been TTC for 4 months but are currently on a couple of month break. My DH has had problems with delayed ejaculation for his entire life. It takes about 1 hr when he's with me, and even by himself is much longer than a typical guy. I was really worried about the added pressure of TTC on that. It has caused so many arguements and hurt feelings. We have been trying intercourse then his own manual stimulation while I "assume the position" and wait until he's just about ready. I was feeling bad about how we've had to separate the sex from the baby-making, but it is really reassuring to see we are not the only ones with this problem. AND that others have been successful overcoming the hurdles and conceiving.

(Sometimes I get so jealous of those women who's husbands get the job done in 2 minutes - but I suppose that has its own downsides when conceiving is not the objective )

 

[tryhardmummy]

Hi gals,
I am back again. Sooo its been over a year now...
Tick tock. I am 36 now and time is a ticking away.
We are still trying the Ovualion prediction kit, but with the no happy ending happening its hardly worth it. Very stressful, and I feel sorry and worried for my hubby who feels less of a man.
I would just love it if my husband didnt feel as big a losser as he feels. He is an amazing lover but just cant bring on the bubba. I will let you all know how I go.
So I have finally decide to go to the fertility clinic. I am exploring artificial insemination.
I hear its not as expensive as you may think, should only cost around $1500 but dont quote me.
Oh one more thing, Stress does not cause infertility. Its a fact, stress can cause a missed period or even be a cause of miscarriage but it can not cause infertility. I was told this by a Melbourne Fertility Clinic.

And to all those people who say "you arent doing it enough, have more sex!!!!" Keep your tips to yourself, you never know peoples situation. Us gals would do it more often if we could!!!!

Peace love and baby, ladies Good luck.

 

[dcone2001]

Hi ladies,

I am a man suffering from this as well. My wife had hpv and had to have her cervix burned i guess basically to get rid of this. At the same time i was trying to have sex with her longer and play games but i think she got self concious that it was her problem so i started faking. Sorry this is leading me to a question. Now i feel like she would not understand if i said i cant orgasm during intercourse. We have done mutual masterbating and all that and even though i dont climax i love when we have sex.
1. do any of you have any suggestions on this matter?

2. more importantly my wife has pulled the goalie about 3 months ago. she always says things like if its meant to be its meant to be. i believe she just wants it to happen with ease. not the case for most people. i want children very badly (why i got married). we are both 31 not getting any younger. do you think if i masterbate prior to having sex with her 5-10 minutes that the left over sperm in my urethra could possibly enter her and impregnate her?
Is this wrong to do? I just figured she doesn't realize anyway maybe this could be a cure all with out the stress. Thank you for all your replies in advance.

 

[mum2beagain]

Hi, firstly I really think you need to be honest with your wife explain it how you just have she will understand also from a womans point of view I think she probobly does notice I always knew my dh wasn't climaxing even when he did occasionlly fake it. As for masturbating b4 sex there is a chance it would work but I would say more liely not in the long run it really is best to explain all to your wife ,good luck

 

[cwa]

Hi ladies, really good to know others are having the same problem! My boyfriend has delayed ejactulation and has done since the beggining, like some of you it is all a bit random I would say once out of every four times he can ejaculate inside me but it may take a while, he has no problem on his own. This again was not a problem when we were not trying, it didnt matter that he didnt, we have been properly trying now for 6 months, the added pressure of him having to come inside me has made things a lot worse. I have suggesterd using a syringe but he was horrifed and does not think that is the answer, He also wont admit that he has a delayed problem but more its just us that have an issue, I am 37 and i really dont know what to do anymore, getting him to come on my days has become an impossible task and has put a real pressure between us, when we start to have sex on my days I am just praying that he will be able to ejaculate and of course this is all pressure. feel very upset and not sure what to do. Any one got any advice?

 

[cwa]

I think I've read just about every resource out there on the net. I guess I'm just looking for someone with this problem who also has a happy ending.

hi ya, have the same problem as you, just wondering a few years on did you manage to concieve and if so how?xx

 

[Crailly]

I know that my DH has more issues when he is stressed or not feeling well - so the fact he was out of work for four months and then he also injured his back - has meant that sometimes we were lucky to be having any , let alone worrying about TTC.

I have been trying a new approach where this month we are just going to have lots of intimate time together, especially on the weekends, and hope for the best.

 

[tryhardmummy]

Still no lucky for me.
My husband was diagnosed with low testosterone.
He has been to so many specialists its not funny.
So in Feb after about 18 months of trying we decided to go to IVF clinic.
The dr tested hubby and it turns out the testosterone injections that he was on to "fix" the ED and low libido killed all of his sperm so all the hard work we had put in for the last 6 months was a waste of time.
So now we have to wait another 3-6 months to see if his sperm corrects itself. Then I will be doing Artificial insemination.
My hubby is going to try hypnosis spiacialist to try to fix the ED problem.
I will keep you posted.

 

[tryhardmummy]

hi ya, have the same problem as you, just wondering a few years on did you manage to concieve and if so how?xx[/QUOTE]

Hi CWA,
Just a word of advice, go see a specialist, better to get some advice now before it gets even harder
NOt trying to scare you, but the time just gets away from you. Everyone is getting pregnant around you, babies are every where, and every extra day of not know if you too are going to be a mum gets harder. You will get more emotional as time goes on. For me its not not knowing, it wont be the end of the world for me, but I feel stuck and cant make any real life decisions till I know if we are going to be able to have a little one.
xx

 

[LauraJoanne]

Hoep this helps, been looking for some succsess stories for you : (from another forum)

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hi there

my OH had this when we first started going out, it was great, having sex for ages but then the novelty of this wore off quickly as others here have stated...

Anyway, to cut a long story short, we decided when we were TTC that he should masturbate and then insert at this point just as he ejaculates and that's how I fell pregnant with DS. So yes, it can work very well indeed!!

We were going to seek counselling, but then we decided to change positions (rather than missionary, we started spooning) and then bang after about 4 to 5 minutes of intercourse he was able to ejaculate inside me.

Like a PP has said about her OH, mine also insisted that it wasn't psychological and that he loved me. I do think my OH relaxed more after our son came along, and changing position helped immensely.

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Male Poster:

I name changed for this but have this problem and for those who are going through this I have every sympathy. I am a regular male poster here and am too embarrased to post under my normal MN name.

I posted about this on another thread a while ago and how we deal with it. We had two lovely DSs this way.

I have a very happy sex life but I what I have found over the years is that I do not get aroused enough by penetration. I used to worry about it. It did get worse when we were TTC as I felt I had to ejaculate and was under a huge amount of pressure. I do not worry about it now though because I have talked to my wife about it extensively, and taught her how to make me aroused through masturbation, oral and other means I have very intense orgasms as a result of delaying ejaculation so there is a plus side.

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My dh suffers from this - and I know how frustrating it must be for you. Especially, if like me you are constantly trying to be positive so that you wont stress him out more... in the end its a viscious circle.

The good news is that we used the exact method you described and I got pregnant - beautiful 1yr old to prove it.

In order to not make a big deal of it, I kinda used the ploy that we were just practicing, and if anything happened, all the better but no pressure. At the same time, I knew my cycle well, so we went away for a few days around that time. Therefore, the sex every other day was more from a fun point of view.

So you both can deffo do it. We are just starting for number two... hopefully it will work as good again.

best of luck!

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this is just what i could find hun, hoped this helped a little. FX for you xxxxxxx

 

[mrsmexico]

hey everyone im new to this site today but so glad i came across this post.. I hope there are still people reading these posts and that we can get in touch and discuss this further.
My husband also suffers the same problems and it would be great to talk to others who are in the same position.

thanks

mrsmexico x

 

[tryhardmummy]

Welcome to the post.
Just wanted to also say thank you to LornaJoanne for your help.
Mrs Mexico, my recomendation is that you seek medical advice. Sooner rather than later.
This can drag on for years, to the detriment of some marriages.
I am super luck that we actually do love each other.
Good luck with it.
xx

 

[Crailly]

My hubby and I actually had a good talk about it this weekend. It just feels good to know that we both recognize this as a problem. His problem is actually more anejaculation, as in he does not finish at all with sexual intercourse. He is not ready to see a counselor yet but we do both enjoy our sexual relationship. We are going to try things for a few more months and then look into IUI or at least at home insemination.

Good luck to everyone.

 

[mrsmexico]

my hubby is the same, we have tried home insem but nothing as yet..
its so good to know there are people out there with the same probs x

 

[merle]

Just an update for all in this situation. I posted a few month ago (about 4 posts above this). It worked!! We are 12 weeks pregnant. So don't lose hope if you are in this situation, you can work around it successfully!