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Discussion in 'Trying To Conceive' started by hpjagged, Aug 26, 2009.

  1. hpjagged

    hpjagged military wife and mummy

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  2. BumpyCake

    BumpyCake Preggers with #1

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    I know what you mean...

    When I was in college (not living in a dorm, it was more like a community college), I had lots of friends. I only speak to 2 of them and I only see 1 about twice a year and the other, I see more frequently because we're both unemployed and live within 15 minutes of eachother.

    Do you have a FaceBook account? I don't, but I heard that others are able to keep in touch so much better that way.

    Also, it seems like you really have to work at keeping friendships going. People are so busy or just doing other things and if you don't invite them out or over, you never get to see anyone. At least, that's how it seems to me.

    I'll be your virtual pal :flower: but I live in the USA so I can't really pop in much. But hey, if you ever come by this way, maybe I'll be able to show you around.
     
  3. MsLesley

    MsLesley Well-Known Member

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    i understand where you are coming from and im sorry you are going through this. you seem like you are a very kind, social person...as i am not....well the social part that is lol.

    I dont have many friends either tho its entirely my fault because they try hard to hang out with me but i have a really hard time feeling comfortably around anyone..even when i have known them for a long time. i wish i was more social and comfortable around other people because i would prefer to be around more people then what i let myself right now.

    i may not have the exact same situation as you but i truly understand how you feel. I hope things will pick up for you :hugs:
     
  4. Liz2

    Liz2 Well-Known Member

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    Oh hun, sorry to hear about the friend situation. Sometimes people can be shady.....sounds like she just may be the kinda girl that is your friend when she needs something....not to judge her character without knowing her.

    I know what you mean though, when I got preggo with my first son 8 years ago all of my friends headed for the hills! We were young and no one else was having babies. I had 1 best friend that I have known for 14 years and as of last week I had to say goodbye. She started using drugs and I told her I couldn't have that in my life or for my family. It was sad to walk away but the choice was hers. I have a couple of people I talk to now and again but not real close and they don't have family plans like I do. So, I know how you feel about being alone cause I feel the same way sometimes. Poor DH has become the one who has to listen to all my girly issues!!! lol. So...I know I am far and we can't visit but you can count me in as a sounding board or a nonsense chatter :)
     
  5. hpjagged

    hpjagged military wife and mummy

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  6. hpjagged

    hpjagged military wife and mummy

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    Sounds good, I love the nonsense chatter! :lol:
    DH is from Cali, Santa Barbara and I wish I there right now! :D
     
  7. hpjagged

    hpjagged military wife and mummy

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  8. banana1011

    banana1011 Well-Known Member

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    I'm with ya! I have relocated twice since college (to NYC and then to Charlotte, NC) and my circle of friends seem to get smaller and smaller. I also work from home, so I don't even have a lunch buddy or happy hour buddy.

    Even though there's a rather large pond between us, I love meeting people! Even if it's e-mailing and telling nonsense to! Count me in as a chatty-cathy buddy!
     
  9. nicholatmn

    nicholatmn Guest

    Well, I went a different path than all of my friends, so it left just OH and I. I recently got back in touch with another friend (actually I found her on this site!) so basically with family, OH and her... that is all the socializing I do.

    So I definitely understand. I have an account on basically every social networking site to get in touch with others.

    But for now, bnb is my communication device.

    xx
     
  10. hannah76

    hannah76 Well-Known Member

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    i often have thought this too... i've also had two big moves and some friends have moved out of town as well, so although i have friends, they're all over the country! one is a 2 hr drive away so i see her a few times a year, but the others are 3000km's away so won't be seeing them again until there's a wedding or something... its hard to make friends in a new city!
     
  11. PrayerfulHope

    PrayerfulHope Mom of 2

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    Ugh military wives really suck sometimes don't they?

    My hubbs is also in the AF and we're stationed in Japan. it's really hard to make friends out here and even harder to keep them! Especially since everyone is always moving around.

    Sucks but gotta say at least you have your husband, right? Mine is my best friend and i love hanging out just me and him but! One of those kickers about being in the military- he's not always around! i've met two friends from a military spouses group on myspace but other than that, I don't know many people. My husband is in a really small squadron and there are only 6 people in his career field in his shop... two are single, two of them don't hang out with ANYONE, one's wife is Japanese (i have nothing against that she just doesn't really hang out with american women) and one is cool, korean so she doesn't speak a lot of english, but other than that no one to hang out with! :(
     
  12. meldmac

    meldmac Mom to an angel and Colin

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    I know how you feel. I moved to Manitoba 10 years ago and haven't really found anyone to be really close to as far as friends go. I've had a few come and go but none that I would call best friends or anything. It sucks sometimes not having someone to do things with that the oh doesn't want to do.
     
  13. Megg33k

    Megg33k Going with the flow!

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    I understand. I have a few close friends, but they honestly all kind of suck. :( None of them are really at the same place in life that I am, and the closest one to it is probably my closest friend and one of the worst examples of what a friend should be in existence of all friendship. Ya know, the ones that are super happy when you can do something for them regardless of how out of your way you have to go to do it, but then can't go even a tiny bit out of the way when you want or need something so simple? Example: I was supposed to go by her house this evening, she decides when I'm almost there to tell me that she's too tired, all I want to do is pick up something from her house that belongs to me and I'm less than 1 minute from her house, she says she's too tired and will get it to me tomorrow. I, on the other hand, have driven out tanks and tanks of gas to help her out in trying to get her current house ready to sell and her new house ready to live in... I've lost sleep to help, I've lost brain cells due to cleaning supplies and paint fumes, I've lost any patience I ever had (which wasn't much really), and she couldn't lose 12 seconds of sleep for me to walk in and walk back out with something I needed tonight? She didn't even need to stand up... her door is always unlocked. WTF? Really! So, yeah, I get it! If you want another long distance friend, I'm in the U.S., but you seem loads nicer than the people I currently call my friends and probably wouldn't be a condescending jerk when I try to get some of my TTC stress off my mind. How about you just move here? :hugs: to you!
     
  14. trynitey

    trynitey Guest

    I'm sorry sweetie! I feel the same way. When I became pregnant with my first child, most of my friends stopped inviting me places, etc. I thought it would be better if I found other moms to be friends with, but that never worked out either and I just ended up getting crapped on. I hardly have any friends at all, and even online I always feel left out and like I don't belong or fit in. I feel like no one wants me around, even when I don't know what I did in the first place. Sometimes, I want to move somewhere else just so I can start fresh as far as friend making goes.

    Just continue to do what you are doing. If they choose not to hang out with you, then they aren't worth it in the first place.
     
  15. Megg33k

    Megg33k Going with the flow!

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    If anyone is looking to move to Illinois (in the States).. I'd be more than happy to be friends with them! :) It's so lonely when everyone around you is awful or close to awful! LOL
     
  16. trynitey

    trynitey Guest

    Megg, you can move to MD by me :lol:
     
  17. Megg33k

    Megg33k Going with the flow!

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    Eh, I might be ok with that. :) My family lives in IL though... so, I'll need a private plane... and maybe a pilot. I've never been to MD. It looks nice in pictures. I'll let my hubby know in the morning! :D
     
  18. trynitey

    trynitey Guest

    LOL! MD isn't all that great, I wanna move to Florida :lol:
     
  19. BranDivah

    BranDivah Will I ever TTC #1?

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    Oh wow...I know what you mean...and it seems the older you get the less and less friends are in your life. Or at least with me it is. I have 2 best friends...one who lives in Atlanta (so 4 hours away from me) and the other lives in Edinburgh(sp? sorry to our Scottish natives/residents...i can't spell worth a flip). And all the other people I know are either just people I work with or family...so it's kinda sucky not having someone I can go to every day and just talk or whatever. At least you have the one friend nearby.
    I totally understand though...I'm someone who thrives off my friends and it just seems like every year I have less and less. So yeah it's definitely hard finding true friends!

    But hey! You've got people here you can talk to right? I'm still relatively new but I have a bad habit of hanging out on message board for hours on end...so hopefully I can meet some nice people I can relate to!
    :)
     
  20. wanabamummy

    wanabamummy cautiously preggas!

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    that is such a shame you feel like this.

    I have a group of friends that i have known since school. we always made a pack to stay in contact what ever. none of us have moved out of the area o i guess that helps. but we all have our own lives babies, marriage, gay.

    If think it is so important to have friends i dont know where i would be without them. (not including my oh).

    I live in suffolk too!!! how coool is that!! lol. we can be BNB buddies?

    x
     

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