Did anyone get any stick for choosing HB?

[MummyMagoo]

My consultant went MAD! I actually cried She told me i was going to have a heart attack and develop a blood clot if i had a homebirth! I really should of put in a complaint.

 

[Bournefree]

That is terrible!!!! What an idiot!

I know that the Obs't have a duty to inform you for any risks associated with labour and birth, but that it is totally unprofessional to use any risk factors as a scare technique to justify there jobs as consultants!!

If you see the same person next time I would ask them if they have EVER seen a natural birth? I would bet money on it they haven't! Why would they, it's not there "job" as doctors.

What I would really do, instead of making a complaint first, would be to phone her secretary, and ask for a letter stating her reasons why it is her opinion your are contraindicated for a homebirth. Always get things in writing. then ask to be seen by a different consultant in the future.

Your MW and your community Head of Midwifery, should be a little more helpful too.

I'm not saying that you're not high risk, but it is upto you to decide what the risks are and if you are happy to have a homebirth and not the other way around - too many women or "helpful" friends and family feel you have to be LET or ALLOWED to have a homebirth by the medical profession!

I do hope things get better, let us all know how you get on - we will all support you!
xXx

 

[Bournefree]

Sorry what I didn't say was that I experianced all of this with my first pregnancy. And it can really get you down - but don't let them ruin your pregnancy. Fight. Esp if you feel that you are going to be fine for a homebirth!

I had gestational Diabetes with my first, but I had a real fight with one of my consultants.. as he was saying I shouldn't be having a homebirth - but when pushed, if was all down to policy, and not clinical evidence of how I was presenting. One of the problems with GD is that you can have a big baby, and that can cause the baby to get stuck in labour - but I wasn't measuing big (I had lots of scans to prove it), and my sugar levels was always ok. So I was like WHERE is the problem? Thankfully my midwifes were very supportive, and so was another lady consultant , who I asked to formally write a letter to that effect in my notes, for all to see.

Things like this can really feel like it is tainting your pregnancy, and is prob part of the resson a measly 3% of women even get to attempt a homebirth!

So, what are the reasons she feel that you might be high risk?
XxX

 

[Mervs Mum]

ARE YOU JOKING????!!! Why in Gods name would he/she say THAT!?

You SERIOUSLY need to complain to the Head of MWery and I'd write to the Chief Exec too! Outrageous!!! That's not giving balanced un biased info so you can make an informed decision. It's emotional blackmail at it's best!!!

x

 

[MummyMagoo]

Ive had my homebirth now
I rang the head mw and the supervisor of midwifery and they come around to my house and okayed it all,they felt i was high risk as i had pregnancy induced hypertension and had a third degree tear in ky last birth,my daughter is three months old now do you think it would be too late to do a complaint?
X

 

[Bournefree]

Congratulations!!!!!! That is brilliant news¬!

It is always worth complaining about something that you feel so strongly about, esp as you still feel this way.

Do it in writting to the Dr concerned, cc in the Head of Midwifery, and the Cheif Exec of the hospital concerned. They are duty-bound under patient charter to respond to you. Even if you don't get the responce you are looking for exactly - I'm sure that it will contain a back-handed apology along the lines of "we are sorry you feel this way".

However, they will have to talk to the consultant concerned, and hopefully it will achieve that particular Dr being a little more cautious with her language in the future!! So I would do it not for your own satisfaction, but for the women who will come to that consultant after you!
xx

 

[Mervs Mum]

Absolutely you should still complain - you might just save another woman from going through the same thing. Imagine if you'd not been the strong person you are.....someone else may have crumbled and this could have totally undermined their confidence in birth!!

I think you owe it to other women to at least write an email They may never know but if they did I know they'd thank you a million times over.
xx

 

[Jenniflower]

It's never too late to complain or comment! If every women who went to see this consultant just left it, it's no wonder she's still able to get away with it. The more people that make a complaint the faster she'll (hopefully) make a change.

 

[chuck]

My MW has said she will support my choice and my counsellor has said she will write a cover letter for my notes to support my decison for HB or my choices of birth plan if I do go to hospital if necessary (I'm HBAC'ing).

BUT I've yet to see a consultant.

I've been told the OB's at QEQM Margate are less supportive than the ones at the other local hospital WHH Ashford but I just could not risk having a certain OB there take part in my 'care' again.

So far no friends/colleagues have said anything much about my choice, many have said good for you, lovely, I wish I was that brave - that kind of thing.

Only one person has said ergh go for the CS why bother with all the fuss it's so much easier - but she lived in SA for many years where CS's are so routine it's silly apparently.

 

[MummyMagoo]

Thank you all! She even had the cheek to say that i "wasn't allowed" a homebirth and that a midwife wouldnt attend to me if i was in labour!!

Chuck thats good that your mws are supportive,i only encounted two unsupportive mws..hope you have a wonderful home birth
x

 

[MissMummyMoo]

Honestly some people should not be professionals

I was really lucky in the fact that my midwifes were very supportive of me wanting a homebirth. In fact they encouraged it and helped me coax hubby into it xx