Do i really have to wait?

[jobooth]

Hello,
I was moaning on here the other day about not being able to afford being off on maternity leave with a new baby for long and how we were waiting to look into it all and if we could swap things around to get through it. The thing is............i dont want to wait.............i want one now. All i do is look through catalogues or on the internet at nursery furniture and baby clothes, pushchairs and car seats, mobiles and cot bumpers. I even browsed the nappy and baby wipe section on tesco website the other day. Whats wrong with me? I know some people have to wait because things go wrong but if your waiting and you havent been told to wait, why are you waiting? Sorry if this sounds like a stupid question, im just wibbling!!

 

[Tattoo]

I was waiting for pretty much the same reason: I'm a teacher, but haven't managed to land the elusive permanent position yet, so not entitled to teachers' maternity rights.
I didn't want to wait any longer, I'm aching to be a parent, so I set out to find out what I would be entitled to, and found that, if I worked on supply for a minimum of six months (I've already done 10 months!) I'd be granted statutory maternity pay. Husband and I went through our earnings, and decided that we could do it, and comfortably too.
I also do private tutoring, which is obviously something I can continue with right through a pregnancy.

I think you need to talk with your partner, look at what you have combined, and then consider the difference if you were to lose your earnings- could you manage, even if it wasn't comfortably? If so, then you can do it.

Good luck!

 

[Essie]

We're in the process of buying a house, and to get full maternity pay I need to work til October. I would love to just try now, but my OH wants to wait til all the house stuff is sorted and then think about whether it's the right time.

I agree you should sit down and look at your earnings and consider whether you could cope or not. And don't feel bad about browsing website, I (and many other ladies here) do it all the time!

 

[jobooth]

Hello, thanks for your replies. I have had a word with my lovely bf and we have worked out that i wouldnt be able to have any time off on maternity at all. I would have to have my 6 weeks at 90% and then go back to work, maybe with a couple weeks holiday on the end. I would only go back part time and my family and friends are all more than happy to help out with childcare. We have decided to wait to ttc until next august because of a booked holiday but i'm thinking if we are waiting until then, we could wait another couple of months as our mortgage is up for renewal and hopefully (fingers crossed) the rates will still be low and we can save a bit of money!! Does it sound as if we shouldnt have kids cos we can't afford to be off with them long term or does it sound ok going straight back and working part time?
Be brutally honest.....its the best way!
Thanks
Jo x

 

[Clareybeary]

Tattoo - I do supply too but have a part time job so will get teacher's maternity pay through that. Do you work via LEA or agencies? I didn't think agencies gave out maternity pay?

 

[BabyQ]

It's so hard waiting isn't it!!!

I ADMIRE women who wait till things are perfect, lifestyle and finance. I personally think this is only fair for the little one, limited stress levels from mummy and daddy!

I'm waiting purely because of our wedding. Initially we planned to have a baby before the wedding but unfortunately i lost the baby at 10 weeks. So then it meant we had to wait till next year, argh! as i definately didn't want to be fat/pregnant for my big day!

But, there's no rush. It was hard at first, i desperately wanted a baby after my mc but now I am 100% happy of the decision we made and feel quite proud of myself!
xx

 

[chickenchaser]

Hello, thanks for your replies. I have had a word with my lovely bf and we have worked out that i wouldnt be able to have any time off on maternity at all. I would have to have my 6 weeks at 90% and then go back to work, maybe with a couple weeks holiday on the end. I would only go back part time and my family and friends are all more than happy to help out with childcare. We have decided to wait to ttc until next august because of a booked holiday but i'm thinking if we are waiting until then, we could wait another couple of months as our mortgage is up for renewal and hopefully (fingers crossed) the rates will still be low and we can save a bit of money!! Does it sound as if we shouldnt have kids cos we can't afford to be off with them long term or does it sound ok going straight back and working part time?
Be brutally honest.....its the best way!
Thanks
Jo x

Hi I don't think going back to work, means you shouldn't have children. Wanting to provide for your family shouldn't be something to be ashamed of and if you have family and friends who are willing to help you then let them. Many of us will not be able to stay at home once our children are born, I like to look at it as your child will be more sociable and the time you spend with them will be quality time, because you will also get adult time.
Take Care, it will all work out in time.

 

[angelwings666]

My OH reckons we should wait till the new year, when we've got our housing sorted and stuff, but I really want to try now. I'm not sure whether to start looking for a new job or hold out at this one - which is a long commute away from home, but I've been here long enough to get a good amount of maternity pay, and I know they'd be supportive. Ugh. I would like to just get my already so the decision's made.

 

[jobooth]

Hi,

Thanks so much for all your support, it really is easier to talk to people who are wtt for the same reasons. We have had numerous chats since and we are defo going to start trying next year, July / August. We just wanted to keep our family holiday in August free from a little one, which i know sounds really selfish but its not just our holiday. It was booked by my OH dad for his 60th b-day n there will be 6 of us.....not sure they will want to be woke up throughout the night by a screaming bambino!!

Also we have decided that i will be going back to work part time, 3 full days per week, the baby will be in care for 2 days and my OH only works half day Friday so Grandad will have baby til he gets home from work so baby is only going to be in care for 2 out of 7 days which i didnt think was to bad.

Sorry to wibble on but just thought id give you an update!!
Jo x

 

[wanna-b-mummy]

It is soooooo hard waiting isn't it. We're waiting for one reason more than others - a home. At the moment, we're living with my parent and are saving up for a property which are really expensive round here. As well as that, I do need to lose some weight which I am tackling now! It's so hard waiting but I'd like our own home before we ttc x

 

[toffee87]

It is very hard!