Do you qualify for this section?

[krissi]

I don't think they mind people posting if it is constructive I think it has just come across wrong. There have been a lot of "just relax and it will happen" type comments in this section. I have read so many people in the TTC section get annoyed when someone makes comments like that and many of them have only been trying a few months, imagine how that feels when you have been trying 3 + years and having all the treatments under the sun. Its hard to bear!

I don't think people should be banned from posting here I just think a lot of people should perhaps re-read their posts before they press post and see if they are appropriate. It is very hard to step into someone elses shoes, we can all say we sympathise and "imagine" how hard it must be, but you can't until you are in that hopeless black hole. Anyway just my opinion, hope I am not stepping on anyones toes xxx

 

[x_Rainbow_x]

can i kinda be a voice of reasons.... i see both sides...

on one hand i post anywhere and everywhere simply to say sorry if sum 1 has had a loss or bad news or congrats if its great news.
its encourangment which everyone loves..
on another hand its nice when people encourange us who have got problems or no its gunna be a hard and rocky road but when you have that bad day and someone says dont worry youl have your baby soon u have time, or say say how bad others have it u wanna just go mad and scream i no i do when im feeling down....
to us its like being told wel have summat we might never have.
i dont think tickers shud b taken down or people should be banned from comming in but i do think there should be guideline on what can be said and what cant be..

weve all very delicate women in here that are suffering and waiting.

 

[Stardancer]

Hi, I've been trying for 9 years, but not all the time, as I wasn't ovulating for much of it... eventually diagnosed with PCOS. For the past 11 months I've been trying and waiting, so I hope I'm welcome in here!!

A quick question, does AC also include drugs like metformin?

 

[Arcanegirl]

Id say yes since metformin can be prescribed to help with IF

 

[Wobbles]

Just want to confirm - Tickers are not being hidden in here ...ever x

 

[genkigemini]

Another thing i'd like to suggest and i'm sure lots of the girls will back me up on this, is that if you AREN'T LTTTCer please don't post in here!!!

I think you are wrong to say that if you are not a LTTTCer you shouldnt post in this section. People come here because they are looking for advice and they know that the best people to ask are those who have been TTC for a long time, as those are the ones who are all clued up and can help.

I understand that women who are fertile who post advice can be upsetting, but people are only trying to offer support and help.

Though im sure people wont come where they arent wanted.

(just my opinion.)

i completely agree with this, i think it is wrong to dictate who can post where and when, i myself have posted in the first tri!!!

i have not been trying to concieve for a year and i post in this section all the time, i think people should be able to offer advice and support as they wish and it is not down to anyone to tell them not to.

This is really going to come out way more horrible than I mean but I am just going to say it and let the cards lie as they may.

Sometimes, when we LTTTCer's are at out lowest, we do not want your support and that is the truth.

If the answer to keeping our more private issues from being read by everyone, than I wholeheartedly support a private section.

BTW - I seriously hate the term 'fertiles" can we come up with a better term. It seems like SUCH a slight and we are all friends here.

to all.

 

[TrixieLox]

I agree with you FJL, in many ways - I very rarely post on here cos I haven't yet been TTCing for 12 months or more (currently on 11th month of TTCing) and would feel a bit odd posting when I haven't yet reached the 12 month post. However, there are certain subjects I know about (eg. short luteal phase) which I like to advise on. And I like to keep posted with people's journeys (eg. yourself, Genkigemini etc) just cos you're fab gals.

But it's important to keep this board what it is and not allow people who've been trying for, like, 3 months, coming on here saying they think they're infertile (unless they have very specific gyno problems) as it blurs the lines too much. I know that if I'm still TTCing in a coupla months, I wanna be able to come on here and chat to other gals in the same boat.

Take care my lovelies and I may well be on here more in a month or 2. xxx

 

[Wobbles]

Hi girls

I need to point out that this section is not just for people who have been TTC 12 months+!! It use to be called 'Problems Trying To Conceive' but we felt we could rename it something more sensitive.

When I do the guidelines this fact will be pointed out. x

 

[Millnsy]

Thanks for clarifying wobbles! I'm not sure who came up with the 12 months but it makes it feel like an exclusive club that you don't necessarily aspire to be a member of! 11 months is still as painful as 12 so who are we to say that certain people shouldn't read or post. I'm all for a balanced approach and some of us LTTC ers need a bit of that some times.

Don't shout at me... its just my opinion!

I appreciate you all and all your advice, stories and support so lets keep it open...

Millnsy x

 

[sparkle_smile]

Hi, I just wanted to post a response to this thread. It is called "do you qualify to be here" I must admit, I felt a little offended.
After a year of irregular periods, I went to the doctor who said it looked likely I had pcos. This is only my second month of trying, but because I saw the thread included pcos sufferers, I came here to get advice, as it was a shock to the system. I instantly met a girl called claire who I have really clicked with and we have become quite good friends. I just found this section to be more encouraging and friendly. So when I saw this post, I instantly felt excluded and like this was some sort of club which only certain people are allowed in. I don't mean that to cause offence, but it is hard enough facing the fact that something you have always wanted will be difficult to obtain, compared to these other people who get pregnant so much as looking at eachother, so we should pull together rather than segregate. Personally, I don't know what I would have done without the kind words from the lovely lovely people here, and the idea that I shouldn't have been entitled to that because I don't qualify, is heartbreaking.

 

[chefamy1122]

Sparkle you have to understand that when this thread was originally started several months ago, there was a lot of posts in this section that were very upsetting to the LTTC girls.....

Good luck with getting a BFP!

 

[DiddyDons]

I have PCOS and have been trying for over a year now and I am lucky if I get one period a year, my cycles are so messed up its unreal ....do I qualify for this section?! I have my dairy in this section and im a bit confused as to weather I should be here now

Huge hugs to us all

 

[Nathyrra]

Don't worry chicks

There has been some hurtful comments in this section at times and I think we have all got in the way of self preservation. This thread is a product of that.

I think only you know when you're ready for this section! If you feel you are, then you are. Of course you belong!

It's a tough ole road, we all need somewhere to cry sometimes. This place will always be it for those that need it.

 

[jacky24]

I have PCOS and have been trying for over a year now and I am lucky if I get one period a year, my cycles are so messed up its unreal ....do I qualify for this section?! I have my dairy in this section and im a bit confused as to weather I should be here now

Huge hugs to us all

For sure you belong here... any PROBLEMS this is the section for you girls... and i am in the same boat as you hun.... after a loss, unexplained infertility, NO AF, NO Ovulation, OVERWEIGHT....

 

[tansey]

It's not just for long term TTC, it is also for ladies who have problems and/or are being assisted. Don't be offended.
I'd let it lie now or you could dredge up a whole lot of hurt.

 

[Vickie]

Hi, I just wanted to post a response to this thread. It is called "do you qualify to be here" I must admit, I felt a little offended.
After a year of irregular periods, I went to the doctor who said it looked likely I had pcos. This is only my second month of trying, but because I saw the thread included pcos sufferers, I came here to get advice, as it was a shock to the system. I instantly met a girl called claire who I have really clicked with and we have become quite good friends. I just found this section to be more encouraging and friendly. So when I saw this post, I instantly felt excluded and like this was some sort of club which only certain people are allowed in. I don't mean that to cause offence, but it is hard enough facing the fact that something you have always wanted will be difficult to obtain, compared to these other people who get pregnant so much as looking at eachother, so we should pull together rather than segregate. Personally, I don't know what I would have done without the kind words from the lovely lovely people here, and the idea that I shouldn't have been entitled to that because I don't qualify, is heartbreaking.

I'm sorry that this thread made you feel that way, however I don't think that is the way it was intended.

If you look at the thread date, it's almost a year old and came about at a time when there were some issues with new members to the forum coming in and posting about their pregnancies--it was insensitive to those who are struggling in their TTC journey. As far as I'm aware there have been no recent problems.

This section is for long term TTC AND for those who suffer known problems and are TTC (No matter how long they have been trying). Please girls don't feel excluded--that is not what this thread was about.

 

[Wobbles]

This thread is how old? I never understand why such old threads are dragged up for debate. As Vickie and others have mentioned 'back then' there were some other issues that raised this concern with some of the girls ...like people TTC 3 months no problems no reason to use this section - thats why there are 2 sections (TTC & this section), New people coming on announcing BFPs & insensitive remarks from people who were not TTC (they were pregnant or parents).

Theres background to the thread therefore theres no need for this to be an issue.

This section is for long term TTC'ers, known problems & assisted conception not all of them reach a minimum time of problems to 'qualify'.

Thread locked.