Do your family members know you are TTC?

Discussion in 'Trying To Conceive #1' started by LuluSS, Nov 14, 2011.

  1. LuluSS

    LuluSS Well-Known Member

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    Feeling a little down today.

    Back in July when me and DH started TTC, I had told my mom and sister. My sister didn't directly tell me (she told my mom, who told me), but basically she doesn't agree with me TTC. That really irritates me because I am married, graduated college this year, and have a career now. She, on the other hand, did everything backwards.

    Also, this morning I emailed my mom and told her how I got a BFN this morning and I will be going onto my 5th cycle of trying. She never replied. Keep in mind, me, my sister, and mom email each other EVERYDAY several times a day. So it's not like she didn't get the email.

    For now on out, I am going to choose not to disclose my TTC efforts.

    Anyone else face similar issues?
     
  2. Impet Limpet

    Impet Limpet Mummy to two under two

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    My DH parents know as do my own and my nana. We sort of said "once we're married we'll be getting a wiggle on". However we haven't said anything about whether we've been successful or not, we plan to keep it quiet until 12 weeks once we get a sticky bean, unless there's a compelling reason to disclose it any sooner.

    Maybe your mum isn't quite sure what to say, don't take it personally.
     
  3. LuluSS

    LuluSS Well-Known Member

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    Well, that is how my family is unfortunately. They are very judgmental and still try to "control" my life somehow. It is sad. But I have decided to just keep quiet until I actually get a BFP. Thanks.
     
  4. Impet Limpet

    Impet Limpet Mummy to two under two

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    We wish you both the best of luck :thumbup:

    Sometimes those you think would be happiest for you just act odd!:shrug:
     
  5. KozmikKitten

    KozmikKitten Well-Known Member

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    Hello! :flower: I understand some of what you are saying! We did not plan on telling our families about TTC, but I had a m/c in August and it just came out with my in-laws. Now they know we are TTC and I feel almost embarrassed to talk about babies with them (my SIL and 2 cousins are also pregnant right now). My MIL starts to get uneasy any time the subject comes up, and that makes me feel even worse!
    As for my parents, I have not told them. My mother has always been very self-involved; always going on about her own problems. I had planned to tell her about the m/c but couldnt get a word in about my life as she cont to discuss her problems. So, I will not be telling her about TTC or any subsequent (god forbid) m/c's that I may have.
    GL with everything; I hope you get a bfp soon so that you may celebrate with those who are close to you!
     
  6. ChattyCatty

    ChattyCatty Well-Known Member

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    My family does not know we're trying. I already put enough pressure on myself, I don't want to have to tell them constantly that it's not happening yet. Especially since I feel that everyone around me is getting pregnant so easily!
     
  7. LuluSS

    LuluSS Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to hear about your m/c :(

    Yeah, my MIL knows as well but she seems ok with it. I just never felt like I "fit in" with my family :(

    Sorry to hear that your mother is so self-involved. Mine can be like that at times as well. But as long as we have our caring DH's then everything will be ok.

    Good luck to you as well and I hope you get a sticky BFP soon!!!
     
  8. LuluSS

    LuluSS Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, that is true.

    But it is nice to have the support! My family knows and they never ask for updates! :wacko:
     
  9. Cordae

    Cordae TTC #1

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    DH and I are keeping it mostly quiet right now ourselves. His sister and her husband know, and my sister and her husband know. Also, our best friends (a couple, who were TTC themselves but are now 4 months preggo!) know. We told these people because we (me, mostly) wanted a bit of a support network. We are both very close in terms of relationship and age, to our sisters and spend a lot of time with them. It would have been impossible not to share.

    My mom I think suspects... she knows I've been baby crazy for a decade now and knows I feel ready. She's been asking questions, although nothing direct, and every once in a while I can tell she is thinking it. She will, of course, be one of the first people to know when I do get pregnant but until then, no one else!!
     
  10. MrsAttard

    MrsAttard Well-Known Member

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    I've only told one friend, and DH has only told one too. We haven't specifically told our families, but I'm pretty sure they know. This summer, since we'd been married for several months, ppl started asking when we were going to, not know we'd been trying for 6+ months already. But I told them that we we're going to have fertility issues due to DH's medication, so it likely wouldn't happen soon or naturally. Thankfully, no one has really asked since. My MIL knows a bit more, since we see her more regularly, but I def wouldn't feel comfortable telling her, or anyone, monthly updates.
     
  11. WM61711

    WM61711 Well-Known Member

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    DH and I have been trying for 3months, I am more reluctant to tell people-Im not sure why, maybe our ages (Im 22 he's 24) but I just feel like I want to keep it to ourselves for now, dont want to deal with any judgement/pressure. He is actually the opposite, he's told his parents, friends, even let it slip to my aunt- which I wasnt too crazed about but shes agreed to keep it hush- I've only told me friends that were NTNP. Im sure my mom has an idea though, and I know everyone would be excited for us and supportive...still, Im just going to wait we get that BFP:)
     
  12. hippiekinz

    hippiekinz FTM to Mason

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    I'm in the same boat! There is no way I'm telling my family were TTC. My mother in law already puts enough pressure on me about when will I make her a grandmother (yet she has 2 grandchildren already). If I said anything to her I can already feel the pressure increasing more. That's why I'm on here a lot asking questions since it's just me and my husband that know. Once I get a BFP then I'll say something =)
     
  13. MrsAttard

    MrsAttard Well-Known Member

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    There is NO WAY I could discuss most of this stuff with my family, or most of my friends. Just tonight I wanted to discuss something that was a little beyond my DH, and DH was like "why not talk to your mother?" "thats the last person I would ask!" Then he said, "okay, how about my mother?" I stand corrected honey, your mother is, in fact, the LAST person I would ask, but thanks.
     
  14. taylorxx

    taylorxx Well-Known Member

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    None of our family members know. I'm not sure how some of them will take it because OH & I are not married yet.. but I know my mother will be over the moon. I would tell her.. but she'd bug me EVERYDAY about it lol. xx
     
  15. mrsc81

    mrsc81 Mummy of 2

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    Unfortunately i told my mum, who told my dad which of course is fine, and i told my sister who has told god knows who! :growlmad:
    I really wish i hadnt said anything as my mum asks me almost everyday what my fertility monitor says, if i could be pregnant etc, etc.. :dohh:
     
  16. Miss Vintage

    Miss Vintage Well-Known Member

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    I told some close friends that we were NTNP (not strictly true), and my mum knows we're TTC. She's very relaxed about it though, when I tell her I'm worried that it's taking longer than I expected, she just says "don't worry, it will happen, there's no rush". I think this is quite good for me, as I tend to over analyse TTC. My father-in-law, however, has been asking when I'm going to make him a grandfather since our one year anniversay (we've been together 8 years), so we're not telling him! I kind of wish I hadn't told my friends anything about it though, because not having tried to conceive themselves, they don't really get why I wasn't pg straight away.
     

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