does anyone ever feel torn between WTT and TTC

[MissKM]

hiya everyone,
i was just wondering if anyone ever feels really torn between WTT and just trying now?

theres a few reasons as to why me any my fiance want to wait, but sometimes (most of the time) i just dont want to wait any longer!!

i feel alot of the time that im waiting for him more than anything else...

 

[OmiOmen]

I would love to TTC now and basically have to remind myself that it is not the right time. The way I feel and logic seem to be in a constant battle but it is not like starting a month early or something like that, it is a 2 year wait for me.

 

[MissKM]

ye i feel like that all the time, i just keep trying to remind myself that its my last year of uni and i need to be able to do my work...especially if i didnt have an easy pregnancy...id probably be the type to get constant morning sickness lol.

sometimes i just dont want to listen to these worrys!!

how come your waiting 2 years? if you dont mind me asking

 

[odd_socks]

I wish that we could be TTC right now but i guess for now i have to wait...

 

[MissKM]

how do you keep up the strength to wait...im just find it unbearable sometimes x

 

[odd_socks]

how do you keep up the strength to wait...im just find it unbearable sometimes x

i honestly dont lol i often cry myself to sleep and break down when i see a baby or someone tells me they are pregnant, i totally understand how u feel....if u need a chat feel free to PM me i know how u feel tho

 

[Sherileigh]

I'm torn as well...we're going to start very soon. Just waiting for some health things to clear up. But I'm torn for a few reasons....mainly can we handle two? And the BIG HUGE reason....will my son be ok? I feel like I'm cheating on him...lol...and it'll hurt his feelings. Silly I know. Then there's part of me that can't wait to start TTC again.

 

[MissKM]

aww im sure your son will be ok...it will probably take some adjusting but once the new little one is old enough to play, im sure your son will be over the moon lol.
sometimes i wish i had a magic wand!!

 

[Ilovemychild]

I can totally relate!! I'm ready to TTC number 2 but my husband isn't. I can see his reasoning, our financial situation isn't as good as it could be, I'm a stay at home mom right now, but I dont think we could afford for me to stay home if we had 2 kids, our relationship needs some mending, we want to move into a house rather than this apt building, the list goes on.

I've got baby fever something fierce right now and it doesn't help that almost all of my friends are pregnant or are planning to try soon.

I just have to remember that it takes two of us to parent. If he's not ready, WE aren't ready. My time will come.. and yours will too!!

 

[HollieQ]

I just tell myself that the time isn't much in the long run of things, even a year isn't a long time in your life - logically!

But yes, emotionally, it's reaaaally hard. Depressing sometimes.

I have a big list of things to get done to the house first, and determination and a spreadsheet to pay off some debt first, which means i need to be in work a bit longer to earn the money to pay it off, concentrating on that has helped me cope! (kind of )

I do wish everyone around me would stop getting pregnant though! LOL.

xxxx

 

[wishandwant]

yes, i'd love to ttc right now but have to control myself sometimes, its so frustrating

xx

 

[OmiOmen]

ye i feel like that all the time, i just keep trying to remind myself that its my last year of uni and i need to be able to do my work...especially if i didnt have an easy pregnancy...id probably be the type to get constant morning sickness lol.

sometimes i just dont want to listen to these worrys!!

how come your waiting 2 years? if you dont mind me asking

I had 4 months of really (really, really) bad "morning" sickness and the rest of my pregnancy got worse with things like hypertension, borderline pre-eclampsia, breech positioning and smaller things like strep-b. So although the MS was really awful it was sort of easier to carry on through (if you do not mind throwing up every 20 minutes, lol). Although the reason we are waiting until then is that it will take us to my last year of Uni. We will be trying in January 2013 so that even if it takes right away I will only have a few months left there.

 

[dadams14]

Ilovemyson your situation sounds so similar to ours. I an currently a stay at home mum with a 1 year old son. Im desperate to have another so the age gap isn't so big but my partner reminds me money is tight and says we should wait a year so when the next baby is born my son will be in nursery. Its s hard fighting with such strong emotions!!

 

[MissKM]

its somewhat comforting to know im not alone in my battle lol.
my friends either have kids or have no desire for them which makes it really difficult to talk to them about it...they dont seem to understand.
sometimes logic escapes me and i just get really frustrated!! xx

 

[BlaireUK]

90% of the time I feel confident in our decision to wait until we have ticked a few things off our to-do-before-children list. But my reason for waiting is based on an assumption that i'll fall pregnant as soon as we start trying. But if I don't (the odds say it won't happen straight away) then i'll be mad and a little upset for not trying sooner and ticking off the list while we wait.

I'm not sure that makes sense but I hope you get the jist!

So yes, i'm torn too!

 

[MissKM]

i totally get you...i think a lot of us think under that assumption, i know i do. but every now and then i sit and think 'what if its not that easy' and i end up sat worrying about if ill come across problems. that sounds really silly but ive never actually been pregnant before, ive had a few scares but never a positive test, so sometimes i just cant help it xx

 

[hippymama23]

YYYESSS!!!!! I totally feel torn!!! We have so many reasons to wtt, but sometimes it just feels like, ahhhh screw it..lets just do it!!! But then I have to think about the potential baby we will make and how to give him/her the best conditions possible to come into!! But that isnt to say...deep down I'd love to TTC RIGHT NOW!!!!! And it doesnt help that my DH has extreme fever!!!! haha!!!

 

[MissKM]

id love a magic wand!! then i could put in place everything thats making us wait so that TTC could being now

wishful thinking i think

 

[dadams14]

Me and my partner didn't plan our first baby and we were both in a bad place at the time with our relationship...plus he was in a houseshare and I was living at my parents.

In those 9 months we bought a house, car, furniture.......and made a family and a home....and now we are stronger than ever. Don't ask me how we made it here but we did and it was the most fulfilling year I have ever had.

I know this isn't the same for everyone and it was a huge risk but it's got me believing that where there is a will there is a way. Would there have ever been a right time? Will there ever be a right time to have number 2?

Not knowing what is going to happen tomorrow could be a reason both for following your heart and taking that leap or it could be a reason not to!! I think it's all about perception. haha....am I talking a load of rubbish?

I guess what I'm saying is, I want another baby

 

[hippymama23]

True, there never is going to be a so called "right time", I wanna take that leap!!!