Does anyone have children far apart in age?

[XcupcakeX]

As above really...im 21 and Lola is 9 months, im not ready for another baby just yet and im thinking by the time iv been to uni in september and then been in my job for a few years i'll be 29/30 when i come to have my second baby and Lola will be 8/9 years old. Is this too big of an age gap? Does anyone have any experience of this and how did your oldest child feel when you had your youngest? Thanks

 

[lisac25]

first of all what an excellent choice of name hehe, my lola is 14 months old and my eldest isabelle is 7 1/2 and the age gap is excellent for us, admitedly we didnt intend the gap to be so big to start off with, we sarted ttc when isabelle was about 4 but things dont always go to plan lol anyway, lola adores her big sister, now she is a bit older they play lovely together, isabelle does get a little annoyed sometimes when she is busy doing "grown up" stuff but on the whole they get on excellently, she is a very proud big sister loves showing her off to all her friends, and is also a massive help, if i run out of nappies or wipes etc she runs off to get me some more, when i was breastfeeding she would get me snacks and drinks or pass the tv buttons, so on the whole anyway its worked well for us, if u wanna know anything else let me know x

 

[ouchwithNo.2]

Our son is 6 and our daughter 11wks.
We werent going to have another hence the age gap. Really because we didnt think we would afford it (and you always do, somehow!) and I had been put off by the birth.
However, when he started school he kept asking why he didnt have a brother or sister to love like all his friends. It made us think hard and we took the plunge..
Harry being 5 was old enough to understand the changes, old enough to express how he felt rather than misbehave and attention seek. There is always a degree of rivalry, I hated my brother and we have 3yrs gap, OH used to have wars with his brother and they are 14mths apart.
I truly think that the age gap has worked. Harry adores his sister, she even shares his room until we convert the space.
He is old enough to help, look after her for 20mins while I get ready in the morning, hold her while she is waiting for bottle (sat down!)
I know they will never be playmates but harry isnt short of friends and thats so important I think with age gaps, you need that outgoing older child.
What I do know they will be there for each other when they are older, when something happens to us, when ella pinches his mates as bf's (!) and someone for harry to love and care for.
It works for us, I wouldnt have it any other way x

 

[XcupcakeX]

first of all what an excellent choice of name hehe, my lola is 14 months old and my eldest isabelle is 7 1/2 and the age gap is excellent for us, admitedly we didnt intend the gap to be so big to start off with, we sarted ttc when isabelle was about 4 but things dont always go to plan lol anyway, lola adores her big sister, now she is a bit older they play lovely together, isabelle does get a little annoyed sometimes when she is busy doing "grown up" stuff but on the whole they get on excellently, she is a very proud big sister loves showing her off to all her friends, and is also a massive help, if i run out of nappies or wipes etc she runs off to get me some more, when i was breastfeeding she would get me snacks and drinks or pass the tv buttons, so on the whole anyway its worked well for us, if u wanna know anything else let me know x

Thanks How was Isabelle as an only child before you had Lola, did she ever get lonely?

 

[Mynx]

There's an age gap of 17 years with my 2 girls!
The huge gap wasnt planned, I never wanted a second child but Evie came along unexpectadly - of course I wouldnt be without her now!!
I have to say, it's not an ideal age gap really because it was like starting all over again. Just as my eldest became independant, I fell pregnant with Evie. I had no baby stuff left over from having my eldest - I didnt have the space to keep stuff like and never planned on a second child! So we had to buy it all over again. People always say that it must be nice having a live-in babysitter and the extra help but tbh, she's 18 next month, the last thing she wants to do is sit in with her baby sister or change crappy nappies lol! She has occasionally babysat for us but it's a rare thing!
My eldest was a little freaked out when I told I was pregnant (it's the "Eeew Mum's had sex" kinda thing ) but once she got her head round it, she was fine. She loves her little sister to bits tho, even if she doesnt do anything to help out!!

 

[lisac25]

no not really, she had lots of friends, and was at playgroup then nursery then school, so always had people to play with, i always taught her about sharing etc anyway, i also aggree with ouchwith no2 with isabelle being a bit older it was easier to explain all the changes while i was pregnant and she understood what was happening, so when her sister was born it was an easy transistion for her, we had decorated the nursery together gone shopping for baby things together, so she was ready and prepared when lola arrived x

 

[Tudor Rose]

Im 25, (DH 35) DD1 is 6 DS is 5 DD2 is 7 weeks tomorrow.
There is 6 years between me and my middle sis, there is 14 years between me and my youngest sis

 

[Lara310809]

there's 11 years between myself and my little brother, and 13 years between him and my big brother. TBH it's a very different relationship. We didn't live together, but would see each other every other weekend, so it was like a part-time sibling if you know what i mean. He's come to stay with me when i got my own place, and he knows that he can always come to me if he needs help, but not from his parents. While I'm still his sister, we've skipped all the bickering etc that I had with my big brother, because I was more mature. When he was old enough to bicker, I was already 16

 

[britt1986]

I don't actually have any experience with it myself, but my brother and I are 10 years apart. I don't ever recall being lonely. I had my friends as a younger child. When my brother came along, I don't ever remember being jealous. I was actually quite excited. I helped my mom out alot. It was a tough time for my mom, but that's a different story. I think that having children far apart in age isn't a bad thing. The older child can be a big help in my opinion.

 

[trumpetbum]

My new baby will be almost 9 years younger than my youngest and my kids are so looking forward to it. Of course my girls have each other, so maybe not the best example. However, my bff has a daughter who was 8 years older than her little sister and 9 years older than her little brother and she is a great example of an age gap working out fine. She dotes on the Los and has had a great run as the only child, so she really appreciated it when her siblings came along. Families come in all shapes and sizes and children generally adjust.

 

[v2007]

Mollie is 10 and Katie is 1.

The gap is big but its easy to look after them both, Mollie does her own thing and i look after Katie.

But Mollie enjoys playing with her and Katie loves it.

V xxx

 

[redpoppy]

My brothers have 3 years between them and then there's a 9 year gap and then me.

Although I don't feel in any way unstable I do miss having a sibling close to my age. I feel like I grew up an only child and although that meant a lot of attention it also meant I spent a lot of time being dragged around places without a playmate. I also envy how close other people are with their brothers and sisters and how they joke and even fight.

I've heard it's different if you have an older sister as even sisters who are a LOT older tend to be interested and bond with younger siblings. However, my LO is just 8 months and I would ideally like to have number two within three or so years so that she has a younger brother or sister to play with.

If I had wanted kids earlier (there's a part of me that wishes I had done) I would have had two in my early 20s and then 2 in my late 20s or early 30s and then be done. I'm 33 now with my first (I thought I NEVER wanted kids) and now feel I want to squeeze three in before I hit 40.

 

[iceylou]

my son is 12 and nicole is 6 wks, kyle luvs his little sis. he was abit strange about it when we told him i was pregnant but then realised nothing was gonna change, he still goes to rugby matches with his dad etc.

im the youngest in my family, im 37, my bro the eldest is 56, sis 54, sis 49 and sis 47!!! my bro is only 4 yrs younger than my mil!!!

nicole is also the youngest in the grandkids, eldest is 29 (she has a 1yr old), 27, 25, 23, 22, three at 19, kyle 12, sarah 10

 

[willow71]

my LO is 3 months old her her sister (my partners daughter) is 31 years old

 

[kizzywizzy6]

There's 9.5 years between my son and daughter, Freya is now 3 weeks old and her big brother dotes on her and he is a big help aswell.

 

[emsiee]

We do. My son is 12 and Jessica is 2 months old. I had my son at 19, and im now 30. Admittedly, I didnt plan it this way but its been the best thing ever. My son really helps us with Jessica.
I didnt feel ready in my twenties to have any more kids, as my son wasnt planned and I hadnt done what id wanted to do then, ie, career, etc... but as soon as I turned 30, I did, so we started TTC.
Its a lot easier to look after them both too, my son does his own thing, and I look after Jessica.

 

[poppy666]

My 4 boys are 17, 18 & 19... Korben is 5mths old, so 17yrs gap with youngest ( well was lol) Dont think it really matters, but have realised Korben will be more an only child because of the gap so at the moment trying for one more if im lucky, but my age may go against me just turning 40, we will see x

 

[tee516]

Hi my name is tee. My daughter mz j is about to be 13 in a month. Me and my fiance' have been tryin to concieve for 3 yrs now with no luck .does any one have some advice?

 

[poppy666]

With me who tried for 6yrs, relax and try forget your baby making. we went out for the weekend and got pretty tipsy and thats when Korben was concieved, now im trying again but using OPK;s to help out a little, good luck sweetie xx

 

[lisac25]

Hi my name is tee. My daughter mz j is about to be 13 in a month. Me and my fiance' have been tryin to concieve for 3 yrs now with no luck .does any one have some advice?

i aggree with the other poster, i know its sounds massivly difficult but just try and forget about it, with my first we werent really that bothered about when it happed and i fell preg really quickly, withing 3 months, with my second because we really wanted it to happen it ended up taking nearly 2 years, and it only happened when i decided to stop woriying about it. maybe have a look in the other secion of this site trying to concieve, will be lots of people in the same situation for you to talk to there x