does your DH not find pregnancy attractive?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by Kylarsmom, Jan 25, 2011.

  1. Kylarsmom

    Kylarsmom 3 amazing kiddos!

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    Just wondering if Im alone on this, DH doesnt find pregnancy attractive, and we dont ever DTD anymore =( Part of it is that Im so tired and sick at night, but I do want to do it a lot more than we are, and I feel like I have to beg, and he complains and doesnt enjoy it. I dont get it. Im still ME. I think its childish to let something like that bother you, I mean, if he loves me , shouldnt he love me no matter what I look like or how I'm changing? I can't help that he doesnt find it attractive, but I cant live with out sex or the closeness to him for 9 months, it's really hurting my feelings. And yes, I've talked to him about it a lot and it's not really doing much.
     
  2. Pipnosis

    Pipnosis New Member

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    Kylarsmom,

    I am sorry to hear about the problems you have had with your DH. I hope that as time unfolds so too will his reasons, and that those reasons are met with solutions.

    Has he said why he's been unenthusiastic for DTD lately? Some men do know why, but perhaps your DH doesn't. And what have you two said to each other when discussing it? Have you brought anyone else into the discussion, such as a counsellor, mutual friend or midwife?

    Some men can find it hard to discuss the relationship with their other half, so I understand if he clams up (I have done so too when my wife says 'we need to talk about something.') Yet if you approach it gently, let him know that you love and desire him, that sex carries no risks for the baby, and assure him that you understand it might be tough for him to talk about, then maybe your "DTD-life" will bloom once more.

    The best of luck to you.
     
  3. kdea547

    kdea547 1 DD, 2 Angels

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    Has he said that it's because he doesn't find you attractive? Maybe he just finds it weird to be doing that with you while you have a little one in there? I would think that most men would find their wives/girlfriends as attractive or more so now that you have the little life that you created together inside of you. You probably aren't at the root of the problem - pregnant women are beautiful!
     
  4. marina294

    marina294 Mum to 2 DD's

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    Lol we hadn't done it for a while tbh I was so tired I wasn't to bothered ! One night in bed he asked nw If I had gone off him of course I said tired but still want to dtd but he hadn't instigated dtd either then he turned over in all seriousness and said am,I allowed to dtd he thought he was going to hurt,the baby,or me the donut -maybe he is scared and doesn't want to admit it
     

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