Double child friggin fog headed

Discussion in 'Featured Tales from the Crib' started by KittyVentura, Oct 14, 2013.

  1. KittyVentura

    KittyVentura Autism Mum

    Jan 14, 2009
    Likes Received:
    Sometimes women ask me what it is REALLY like having two and I usually say something about the amazing side of it where they communicate and play nicely etc and add in a bit about how manic and non stop it is... Finishing with a bit of humour and a sincere comment that it is just wonderful.

    I never say about how sometimes I am really thirsty and I grab a can of diet coke (smite me) and move it unopened from place to place for about 3 hours thinking "where did I put that drink? I'm thirsty" before locating it, moving it to where I am and then being needed by one of the smalls, before I move to another place and forget about it until it starts again... 20 minutes late and twice as thirsty. Because the wonderful side truly does make it all fritter away into nothing... And I do eventually drink my can of diet coke... Just 3 hrs later than intended lol.

    Well just now a spectacular "double child friggin fog headed" moment happened. I needed he loo and, as my leggings were mucky and we are now home for the duration, figured I would use the upstairs bathroom and get changed into some slogs at the same time.

    So, about 45 minutes after this genius idea first strikes me, I head upstairs. Fin hot on my tail begging to get his train track out right now... after he just put it away in a fit of rage 20 seconds ago because he couldn't make a dieselworks. I send him back down with the promise of doing track in just a minute, Mummy JUST NEEDS TO PEE. I close the gate and rush back up. He starts screeching at me about the unfairness of it all and Amelia has come to join in and is hanging off the staircase rattling and banging it. Giving a general "insane asylum" sound effect and vibe.

    I pull my leggings down en route from bedroom to the loo... Trying to save precious time because, even though I have only been gone 25 seconds so fàr and the rooms are baby proofed pretty well after having 2 and 2, it is not long before certain death will occur (boom boom boom boom).

    Fin suddenly ramps up his screaming, like a bear has got in the house and is actually eating his leg so I rush from the toilet to the top of the stairs, leggings round my ankles and bladder fill to bursting, to see he is fine... Just clearly a bit mental because he is screaming like he is being killed but actually smirking too.

    Relieved that death has been avoided for another moment I back into the toilet and sit down...

    Ahhhhh sweet relief... OMG an empty bladder definitely never felt THIS good before... Oh me oh my... Wait... Something isn't right... Something DEFINITELY isn't right...

    Oh that's right I forgot to pull my pants down and have just pissed myself. Brilliant.

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