Doula opinion...

[gina8177]

I've interviewed 2 doulas so far and wanted to interview one more before making my decision. My midwife provides a lot more support than most midwifes here so I probably don't need a doula, but I would still like one.

Out of the first 2 I liked 1 a lot and felt that what she can provide will compliment my midwife well. She's attended 30 births and will have more plenty more under her belt by my due date. The other one was a little intense for me and she had only attended 5 births.

So I've been waiting to interview the last one. She has attended over 100 births, has 5 kids and is also in midwifery school. But I've waited for her to get back into town. She canceled our first appointment as she had to take a postpartum doula shift at the last minute, and I was ok with that. She was supposed to come over Friday night, she didn't show up, phone, email, etc. Honestly this kind of put me off. What happens around my due date if she just doesn't show up. She may have a valid excuse but I don't even feel like bothering. It's been two days and I still haven't heard from her.

Do you think I should give her another opportunity to meet us or just say forget it and go with the one doula we like so far?

 

[kmac625]

It's up to you hun, but I'd be ticked enough not to use her, though she seems like she'd be great otherwise...If you're still unsure you could always try once more to get ahold of her and if you still get no response or her explanation of why she missed the appointment is rubbish I'd just go with the other doula you liked.

 

[gina8177]

I was pretty darn annoyed. DH said I should phone her but I honestly feel I shouldn't have too. I just can't believe that she would miss it and not bother to get a hold of us to complain. I'm sure hormones are making me more bitchy than normal too! lol!

 

[Janidog]

I wouldn't contact her again and if she couldn't attend the agreed time then imagine what she could be like at your birth.

Im also interested in having a doula, but im also wanting a home birth where i would have 2 midwife's anyway, so would a doula mean to many people in the room?

 

[Blob]

I'd say leave her, if she cant make these meetings how often will she ditch you when you really need her

 

[Jetters]

I would call and hear her excuse but to be honest just cos she's been at a hundred births, that doesn't mean she's any better than the one who's been at 30!!

That was damn rude and unprofessional of her not to call, or to send a message afterwards to apologise.

Janidog, my ex girlfriend is a doula and was at many homebirths where there were also mw's. It's up to you, if you feel that your home is big enough, and also the doula will no doubt come much before the mw's do.

 

[gina8177]

I ended up going with another one that I liked. She finally emailed me last night to tell me that she accidently doubled booked and had one of her kids xmas things to go to. I'm sure she is good, but I didn't like that it took 48 hours to find out why she didn't make it.

I think it's up to you how many people you are comfortable having. For me it will be me, hubby, midwife and doula. And I think that the doula will provide a lot of support to the DH as well.

 

[Nimyra]

How soon is the right time to start looking for a doula?

I'm interested in getting one because my OH will be overseas for a lot of my pregnancy - and although we'll try to time his 2 week leave to coincide with my EDD, these things aren't exact and I want to be sure I have support.

 

[gina8177]

I'm not sure what the right time to look for a doula is, apparently I am not the norm interviewing and choosing one so early. But this way I don't have to worry about them filling up and not getting to choose one I like.

So I guess it's never too soon!