Even if nobody reads this....

Angels123

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Today I went to the baby shower of one of my best friends. Her due date is 2 days after mine was.

Looking at her beautiful baby belly and all the love and joy in the room. Words can not express how hard today has been on my heart. Although I am so happy for her, I am still really really sad for myself.

Emotionally today is UNBEARABLE!!! :(

Even if nobody reads this getting it out by writing it down helps.....I miss you every day my tiny angel xxxxxxxxxx
 
:hugs:

Sorry for your loss! You are very brave and strong for going and I am sure your friend was very happy you came.

Tomorrow is a new day!
 
*hugs* I feel the same as you at the moment hun, I've got lots of people that I know that are pregnant and due around the same time as I would have been and while I am happy for them, every time they mention a scan or feeling the baby move or even seeing their blossoming bellies it feels like a knife in my heart. Nobody else realises how I feel because I tell everyone I am ok ect. Thank god we have this forum to be able to talk freely and let out emotions. So sorry for your loss sweetheart xxx
 
:hugs: I am so sorry x
 
:hugs: I am sorry hun I know how you feel hun i think the pain never ends.
 
you did well in going,i still find myself avoiding anyone I know who is pregnant.:hugs:
 
omg wot a fantastic friend u are!!!! i had a missed misscarriage nearly 4 weeks ago,at the 12 week scan it was the most horrible thing ever,im sorry 4 ur loss 2 hun x
 
Thanks everyone for your support, I am overwhelmed by your kind words x
 
I'm so sorry for your loss. My best friend & his wife are having their first baby, after trying for 7 years. Our babies would have been 3 weeks apart. Although I am so happy for them, I can't help but to feel so much pain in my heart when they talk about the baby. I put on a good face & act like nothing is wrong, but inside I am hiding a bunch of emotions & holding back my tears. It seems like every happy moment for them breaks my heart a little more. First, she started as a high risk pregnancy & one day, she began to experience some bleeding. I prayed for her & the baby to be ok & thankfully they were. Then, exactly one week later, I began to bleed, so naturally, I called her to get some advise but unlike her, I did lose my baby. In my heart I felt that I was going to have a baby girl, but I never found out the sex. Then, a month after my mc, they found out they were having a girl. =( I nearly passed out, but somehow pulled together the strength to smile & congratulate them. Then, the baby shower came around & as painful as it was, I pulled through & attended - even played games. Inside, however, I was tortured. All I could think of is how much I wanted it to be my shower, for my baby. =( As happy as I am for them, I am so sad that I will never get to hold my baby.
 
Oh dear :( I am so sorry to hear that you lost your baby too. I made a dacision the other night after a couple of drinks. I have thrown out the positive pregnancy test I have been holding onto (I would look at it eveyday), taken the scan photo's out of my draw...and I'm letting go and moving forward. I think it's really the only way I'm going to survive this.

I do hope that your okay, I know there will be other babies for us, babies we can love, play with and watch grow. My main focus now is not going to be my sorrow, but getting my mind and body in the pest possible condition to try again.

Much luv to you all x
 
:hugs:

This must have been so hard for you. You are a very strong person and a very good, selfless friend.
 
Yes, let's not let our sorrow overpower our lives & let's move forward. I had some ultrasound photos that I had not seen since before the mc. I was planning on looking at them when I was ready, but never got a chance. 2 months after my mc, I finally got the courage to look at them, but when I went to get them out of the drawer they were in, they were nowhere to be found. When my husband realized what I was looking for, he confessed that he threw them out after the mc!!! I could not believe what I just heard, I could have choked him, but instead just sobbed. I was so angry at him & so hurt and although he was very remorseful, he assured me that it was the best thing to do so that we could move on. Because I love my husband so much & because he is such a kind and loving person, I knew that he did it with the best intention, and now I can say that it was probably the best. I know now that if I had those pictures, I would just be looking at them all the time & would not be able to get through my depression.

Life is better for me now & I know it will be for you too. I know you'll have beautiful babies and that you will be an excellent mother.
 
I am so sorry. I suffered a miscarriage as well years ago. It does get easier but I understand that it's hard now. My prayers go out to you.
 

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