Fed up

Discussion in 'Long Term Trying To Conceive' started by kaye, Jun 2, 2011.

  1. kaye

    kaye Well-Known Member

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    Hi

    well i am really peed off, managed to convince myself that month 20 was my month and even stupidly began symptom spotting, which i havent done for while. So today is only cycle day 24 but last night, the tp was discoloured and i have really bad stomach cramps and this morning again, the tp was discoloured again which usually means AF on her way. On cd24!! WTF is going on. I am so upset and gutted. Sick of trying just to fail month in month out. I just now beleive it wont happen to us.

    So i need to ring the hopsital today is AF shows up full flow to arrange my Hysterosalpingogram to check my tubes, but they told me if they are clear then nothing more they can do for us as nothing wrong to fix. Gutted.

    Just dont know mentally how much more i can take
     
  2. cranberry987

    cranberry987 Mum after ttc 16 cycles

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  3. lucylou35

    lucylou35 Member

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    Hi,

    I know exactly how you are feeling..I am on 18th month of trying, I was so sure it had happened this month as fertile time was when we were on holiday and I was so nice and relaxed.I always have a 26 day cycle so when Af hadn't showed day 26 or 27 my hopes were really up, but then yesterday day 28 Af appeared was so gutted.
    Just think it will never happen.. and don't know if I can take much more, feel so depressed.
    How do you cope with the disappointment each month?
     
  4. kaye

    kaye Well-Known Member

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    i dont cope well to be honest, i cry alot and i am all worked up all the time. Its all i think about! I need to try and de-stress. I tried reflexology this month, which was ok. Not sure wether to keep going to that.

    Sending babydust your way ladies xx
     
  5. cranberry987

    cranberry987 Mum after ttc 16 cycles

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    I would book things in your diary so you have something to look forward to rather than the endless cycle of waiting for ov/af. go to gigs, meals out etc, go to the zoo.
     
  6. lucylou35

    lucylou35 Member

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    It is so hard isn't it,I find the day my period starts the worst, I am just so emotional but then usually within a few days I get a bit more positive again and focus on lots of BD!

    Thanks cranberry987 for your advice, I do usually have lots of things to look forward to, and now as of a week ago have a wedding to plan!
    but it still sometimes takes over your thoughts
     
  7. dizzyshell

    dizzyshell Well-Known Member

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    I had exact say issue last cycle.its cycle 17 last cycle and i NEVER symptom spot and im serious never have .But last cycle i started getting pains in right side and felt sick , was hungry all time boob pains , headaches every night .Everything pointed to BFP i even nearly told my mom on 5dpo i was pregnant i believed in it so much.
    Ive 27day cycle ovulated cd11 so i did hpt 9dpo and BFN .I thought ok , maybe to early so 10dpo/11dpo came BFN.
    Then came the witch 4days early i was so angry and gutted.I really believed for once in 17cycles it was my time .

    Because ofthis now i'll NEVER think im pregnant again.
    To make matters worse insted of my usual 4-5days AF , I had her in town for 8days .Its cd10 now and BFN on ovulation sticks normally i start getting a 2nd dark line but sod all no hint of a line.So now fxxk knows when i'll ov and i had perfect ov time if all had been normal , all weekend would of BD but now im late ov cant do it , as on hoilday not with o/h next weeks so another BFN this cycle again GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

    BIG HUGS HUN XXXXXXXX
     
  8. dizzyshell

    dizzyshell Well-Known Member

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    sorry to sound dumb here lol but is TP meanTAMPAX ??xx
     
  9. wantanerd

    wantanerd Well-Known Member

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    I get the disappointment and I am probably setting myself up for some as well with this cycle but I was seriously tired of worrying and hating myself after getting my hopes up. So for this month, I am insanely hopeful it will be my month but I have my back up plans all laid out for the next few cycles to remind myself this is not the end and come hell or high water one day it will happen for me. =)
    Remember to never give up! It will happen! Being positive gets me a lot farther than being negative.
     
  10. kaye

    kaye Well-Known Member

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    toilet paper lol xx
     
  11. kaye

    kaye Well-Known Member

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    Bigs hugs right back too xx

    I will also never symptom spot again! I will never let myself beleive i am pg either until i am least a week late. I cant beleive AF showed 4 days early.
    I now have my appointment for my tubes and uterus to be checked on 10th June, so no sex until after that now either, so that probably means i am out next month too.

    Frustrated!

    Good luck to us all, praying we all get our BFP soon
     
  12. dizzyshell

    dizzyshell Well-Known Member

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    Hi again

    TP -tampax lol how silly am i :dohh:

    I was 4days early for AF last cycle i wanted to smash the house up :growlmad:

    Ive had dye test and rest and all was fine .Your be fine babe dont worry.And you can have sex after dye test .Well few days after at least.

    Did AF properly show as yet ??

    how long did you say ttc ?do you use opks ?xx
     
  13. kaye

    kaye Well-Known Member

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    Glad your test came back clear, how long have you been trying?

    Well the weird thing is, this morning the toilet paper was discoloured, then this afternoon it went a bit red (just when i wiped), then tonight its totally stopped again. But as soon as i seen red i rang hospital to book my appointment for the test on tubes. So god knows whats going on, see what tomorrow brings now. this was cycle 20.

    Good luck to you xx
     
  14. kaye

    kaye Well-Known Member

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    Update, AF dissappeared after her little show yesterday and hasnt returned.

    made appointment that i will have to cancel. Dont know whats going on. Playing games with my mind & body!
     
  15. Dazed

    Dazed Going with the flow

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    Sorry your having a hard time Kaye. I had my mental breakdown last month. It never gets any easier does it? Well, hopefully with the witch hiding ATM it will mean something.
     
  16. kaye

    kaye Well-Known Member

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    Hope your having a better month Dazed? xx
     
  17. Dazed

    Dazed Going with the flow

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    Well, we still have yet to see. Emotionally its been up and down, and there has been a bit of force having to have been used with my doc. Only time will tell I guess.

    I hope you get more help soon other than the HSG.
     
  18. Bradpittswife

    Bradpittswife Cautiously pregnant

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    Sorry your having a bad month honey- I know exactly how you feel :hugs:
    My cycles vary in length from 32 to 42 days so when af didn't show by day 45 I thought maybe we'd had a miracle... day 51 brought utter crushing disappointment on a level that I can't even begin to explain to anyone who hasn't experienced it. I know in my heart it is highly unlikely to happen naturally but we still hope no? Anyway I now have my hsg scheduled for June 9th- it was supposed to be may 19th and all my blood tests that i had done were pointless as they were way too early! We go back to FS on June 14th and now I think she'll just send me away for another month or so to try and get the right blood test timing :-(
     

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