fed up!

[jack79]

Hi ladies

I'm having one of those days where I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself and I'm spending hours online trying to find a magic answer to my fertility problems (even though I know I've been here quite a few times before and know there is no easy answer!).....

I'm just looking for some words of support really.... does anyone else have days like this when TTC just seems so hopeless, like it's never going to happen??

I also feel I can't talk to my other half about it, cos he has heard it all before and thinks I'm too fixated on the issue, which is creating more stress, which in turn is stopping us from conceiving....

Life is pretty shit at times!

 

[Princess Lou]

I could have written that myself. Lol.

I'm, constantly looking for answers to the million questions I have but never seem to get a response from professionals.

We've been at this for over three years and it just seems that we will never get where we want. I even stopped responding to medical treatments.

I don't want to talk to my hubby about it every time it's on my mind because I know he gets sick of hearing the same thing over and over again although he will never say this to me.

It's why I love this site so much, I'm not the only person feeling like this and I can get support off wonderful women who are going through a similar sort of thing or have gone through it. Good to know as well that I can offer ladies advice based on my own experiences.

XXX

 

[Sizzles]

I too know how you feel! I'm currently feeling ok with things generally, but then, I'm approaching ov and always feel more positive around now as we're in with a shot again. It's when dtd doesn't happen when it should that I get down and also as I approach af - especially if I have signs to suggest it's on it's way. Some days I cry a lot and feel that life is very unfair. I still think this at the moment, but feel more positive about the future. I can't bear the thought of never having a baby. I have a husband who really doesn't understand, and, like you say, feels I'm far too fixated on it to lead a normal and happy life. He says I shouldnt' think about things like when a baby would be due, when I'd start mat leave, when we could announce it etc. I give myself milestones, like if it doesn't happen this month I'll have had another birthday before (possibly) having a baby and will be a year older and will be more depressed about the situation... yadda, yadda, yadda. He doesn't understand that I can't NOT do this.
So, yes, I know how you feel and I hope you start feelign more positive again soon. It's a rubbish old process ttc in my opinion!

 

[jack79]

Thank-you both for replying... hearing that other people are going through the same rollercoaster ride of emotions definitely makes me feel more normal!

My OH and I are approaching the 2 year mark and although it may not be as long as some people, it's feels like a lifetime... I'm looking into acupuncture as a next step in the process, although I'm finding that my OH is a bit reluctant to give it a go. He's a believer in "it will happen when it's meant to happen" which can be quite frustrating at times!!

On a more positive note, after writing my post above I decided to go out for a run and it's cleared my head a bit... I actually feel a bit better about things already

xxx

 

[Amber3]

Hi there
I could also have written exactly the same. Just yesterday my husband told me I was too focused on this stuff and we had an argument (again). In a way he is right but I don't know how to change. I never thought that I would still feel so hopeless after 4,5 years of ttc. I guess I expected I would give up at one point and live pretty happily ever after. But I also still spend endless hours on the internet looking for the magical cure. Now I will start the gluten and dairy free diet soon and I am also taking something interesting called Propolis
Best wishes girls,
Amber

 

[jack79]

Hi there
I could also have written exactly the same. Just yesterday my husband told me I was too focused on this stuff and we had an argument (again). In a way he is right but I don't know how to change. I never thought that I would still feel so hopeless after 4,5 years of ttc. I guess I expected I would give up at one point and live pretty happily ever after. But I also still spend endless hours on the internet looking for the magical cure. Now I will start the gluten and dairy free diet soon and I am also taking something interesting called Propolis
Best wishes girls,
Amber

TTC longer-term can really test a relationship...i guess men just don't understand because they are...wel, men! My OH and I have had a number of arguments over the past few years, most of them down to frustration and being in a situation that is outwith our control. It's hard...

I went to see a nutritionist a number of months ago and she suggested I was eating too much wheat and dairy so I cut both from my diet for a couple of months. Over the past few months though I've found it hard to stick to the diet and now I'm not so strict, although eat a lot less wheat than before, and now only drink goats milk or rice milk... not sure it's made any difference to my fertility but you never know what's going on inside your body?!

Good luck with the diet.... what's propolis, haven't heard of that.....

xx

 

[Sizzles]

Is propolis that stuff to do with bees and honey? Or am I thinking of somethign completely different?!

 

[Armywife84]

Everyday!

I think it's hard because we don't have any physical support, aside from our husbands. The infertile friends I do have, don't live near me, are mourning losses, or have moved on and adopted. So none of them really want to talk about it. Or I don't want to bother them with my journey, when they're worse off than I am.

When you're having a crap day, it's best to have a nice hot bath/shower, change into pj's , and lounge on the couch with your glass of .

 

[secrethopeful]

it's been 16 months for me. We haven't reached the arguing stage yet, I try not to talk about it. It gets me down though and dh thinks he's done something wrong then. I can feel the tension building. It's just a matter of time.

 

[Amber3]

Yes Propolis is bee stuff. It is something I stumpled on that has been given to infertile girls with endo over a period of 9 months and a placebo group of girls in the same situation. After the 9 months 60% had gotten pregnant in the propolis group (2 x 500 mg a day) and 20% in the placebo group. I thought it sounded quite promising so I went and bought the stuff a few days a go.
Are you aware that more than 80% of infertile women have endometriosis. This is the knowledge that came from NaProTechnology in the US where every infertile woman started her treatment with a laporoscopy. Most people have no idea they have it.
Best wishes,
Amber

 

[Amber3]

Dear Secrethopeful
In my relationship the arguments were worst the first year of TTC. TTC is definately a test that clearly shows a couples ability to communicate and to cope with problems together. Tests we have not passed very well, but we still love each other
My husbands ever optimistic attitute has been my biggest problem. And now we have started the adoption process as well and he is very very positive about that too.
Best wishes
Amber

 

[mg80]

*

 

[Damita]

We aren't really arguing, I just sometimes, DH is way too positive and I am just negative so this can cause a debate.. first year was the worse..