Feel weird about nursing a child of the same sex?

[arlosmama]

We just found out we are having a girl and for some reason I am having a hard time getting my head around the fact that I will be nursing another female. I nursed my son for 19 months and never had nervousness about nursing him, but for some reason I am having a bit of a struggle with this. I am hoping that my instincts kick in and it will be a no brainer. I also can't tell if it is because I am nervous about having a girl in general. I am not a girly girl and I hate anything with pink or purple or bows or ruffles...so I can't tell if it is a combination of my nervousness about not knowing what I am doing and how to raise a girl or what.

Has anyone else had this or had a boy first and a girl second? Does it come back naturally?

 

[beth_terri]

It will kick in itl just be those silly hormones. Ive had a boy and im hoping for a girl this time. Ive struggled to come to terms with being pregnant (even though planned) and sortof thought if its a girl itl be ok but if its a boy its gona be awful> i really dont know why I feel like this and im worried about how im gona bond with baby whan its here. But im sure it will be fine when it comes to it.
I suppose breast feeding will be the same wether its a boy or a girl
xx

 

[lisab1986]

OMG im the same! I dont know what were having yet but everyone is insisting were having a girl...if they are right i would much prefer to bottle feed I would like to breastfeed and formula feed so oh doesnt miss out so much this time but if it is a girl it will take a little getting used to..im also not in the slightest bit girly so im well in my comfort zone with lads

 

[arlosmama]

THANK YOU LADIES! It is such a relief to know that I am not alone. I feel so guilty about feeling this way and I have such a love affair with my little guy that I just don't know what to do with raising/nursing a girl. I have so many friends who nursed their daughters but most of them had their daughters first. Ugh...I do hope it is hormones...because I am going to feel bad if I don't bond. Although it took me some time to bond with my son at first but we had rough times after he was born...

I understand exactly how you are feeling. Remember you're not alone.

Just curious...are you planning on finding out the sex? After we found out with our girl we were both so spun that I told my hubby I was so glad I have 32 weeks to adjust and get my head around it...lol...a mothers instinct has to kick in...at least it better!

 

[lisab1986]

We plan on finding out the sex ..i really dont care what were having as long as its healthy but ill be the first to admit i will struggle to get my head round having to do girly things IF we are having a girl.

 

[beth_terri]

At first I wasnt going to find out. But I think I am now so that ill have plenty of time to get my head around it if it is another boy!! I feel bad for feeling this way but I cant do anything about it!
xx

 

[megrenade]

OMG im the same! I dont know what were having yet but everyone is insisting were having a girl...if they are right i would much prefer to bottle feed I would like to breastfeed and formula feed so oh doesnt miss out so much this time but if it is a girl it will take a little getting used to..im also not in the slightest bit girly so im well in my comfort zone with lads

you could pump a bottle instead? it would keep your milk supply up
(that's what I'm planning to do)

 

[notmommyyet]

My mom had that problem with me. I dont know what she did about it just wanted to tell you your not alone. I actually think my mom bottle fed me

 

[MrsMystery]

Seeing these posts just made me feel better a little. I was told by the sonographer on Friday that she's about 70% sure my LO is a girl. First off, 70% is a strange number so that doesn't help...

But also, I, for some reason, am terrified of raising a girl. I feel so unprepared and like I have no clue how to bring up a girl. As the OP wrote, I am also not a girly girl and I also cannot stand pinks and purples and frilly things and flowers etc...I've seen some really nice girls' clothes out there but the stuff I like is SO fng expensive!!

Anyway, it is nice to see I'm not alone in this...sorry I can't offer any advice though. I'm on my first little one.

 

[lisab1986]

OMG im the same! I dont know what were having yet but everyone is insisting were having a girl...if they are right i would much prefer to bottle feed I would like to breastfeed and formula feed so oh doesnt miss out so much this time but if it is a girl it will take a little getting used to..im also not in the slightest bit girly so im well in my comfort zone with lads

you could pump a bottle instead? it would keep your milk supply up
(that's what I'm planning to do)

Thats what i plan to do i think i breastfed with no problems with my youngest so im hoping ill be the same this time..be it from a boyyle or breast.

Seeing these posts just made me feel better a little. I was told by the sonographer on Friday that she's about 70% sure my LO is a girl. First off, 70% is a strange number so that doesn't help...

But also, I, for some reason, am terrified of raising a girl. I feel so unprepared and like I have no clue how to bring up a girl. As the OP wrote, I am also not a girly girl and I also cannot stand pinks and purples and frilly things and flowers etc...I've seen some really nice girls' clothes out there but the stuff I like is SO fng expensive!!

Anyway, it is nice to see I'm not alone in this...sorry I can't offer any advice though. I'm on my first little one.

I know what you mean..my oh has seen a dress that he wants to buy IF were having a girl and its like £25 i honestly think girls are sooooo expensive

 

[littlemamana]

This topic kind of weirds me out. Why would it be a problem to breastfeed a female baby and not a male? There's nothing sexual about breastfeeding and if you see it as being sexual you need to address that issue. It's a natural thing and you shouldn't deprive your female baby of that awesome nourishment just because she's a girl.

 

[beth_terri]

Arlosmama- Reading this thread has somehow made me think too much about breastfeeding a girl. Id never thought about it before- just that I will breast feed my baby. But now im thinking its strange nursing a girl!! Even though it obviously isnt strange at all. I keep remembering my little boy when he first fed off me and I would look down and see this beautiful baby boy feeding. Now im thinking how strange would that be to see a girl feeding off me. Im over thinking it!

 

[beth_terri]

This topic kind of weirds me out. Why would it be a problem to breastfeed a female baby and not a male? There's nothing sexual about breastfeeding and if you see it as being sexual you need to address that issue. It's a natural thing and you shouldn't deprive your female baby of that awesome nourishment just because she's a girl.

This was a bit cruel and disgusting. No one mentioned anything sexual about it. Everyones allowed an opinion and worries during pregnancy.

 

[amy19604]

I don't understand either, i don't see the problem or the difference. a baby is a baby.

 

[littlemamana]

This topic kind of weirds me out. Why would it be a problem to breastfeed a female baby and not a male? There's nothing sexual about breastfeeding and if you see it as being sexual you need to address that issue. It's a natural thing and you shouldn't deprive your female baby of that awesome nourishment just because she's a girl.

This was a bit cruel and disgusting. No one mentioned anything sexual about it. Everyones allowed an opinion and worries during pregnancy.

Okay, so then, what exactly is the issue? The fact that the women in this thread are comfortable nursing male children but not female children is obviously an issue with the gender which naturally leads one to believe that you are somehow viewing it in a sexual light which, as I said in my post, it is not sexual in any way. It's a mother's way to nourish her child and I think this whole worry is rather odd.

 

[jenniferttc1]

I always thought it would be the other way with women feeling weird breastfeeding a boy for some reason. I have no weird feelings to breastfeeding either gender. They are both just babies that need to be fed.

 

[nostress]

Seems like it would be more difficult going from having a little girl sucking your nipple to having a little man sucking off your nipple... Just saying. Either way, a baby is a baby. If I was having a freaking gorilla I would still breast feed it from my very own breast, not pump. I loved the experience with my first child, and wouldn't take that experience away just because my next baby would be of the opposite sex. I was actually thinking of being a wet nurse once, I had a ridiculous milk supply with my first LO and loved nursing sooo much.

 

[littlemamana]

Seems like it would be more difficult going from having a little girl sucking your nipple to having a little man sucking off your nipple... Just saying. Either way, a baby is a baby. If I was having a freaking gorilla I would still breast feed it from my very own breast, not pump. I loved the experience with my first child, and wouldn't take that experience away just because my next baby would be of the opposite sex. I was actually thinking of being a wet nurse once, I had a ridiculous milk supply with my first LO and loved nursing sooo much.

Hahaha I loved the gorilla part!

 

[judge12]

Yeah I don't understand...I'm having a girl and I am put off breastfeeding a baby, not once have I ever thought of it's gender just be strange having a baby feeding from me.

 

[beth_terri]

This topic kind of weirds me out. Why would it be a problem to breastfeed a female baby and not a male? There's nothing sexual about breastfeeding and if you see it as being sexual you need to address that issue. It's a natural thing and you shouldn't deprive your female baby of that awesome nourishment just because she's a girl.

This was a bit cruel and disgusting. No one mentioned anything sexual about it. Everyones allowed an opinion and worries during pregnancy.

Okay, so then, what exactly is the issue? The fact that the women in this thread are comfortable nursing male children but not female children is obviously an issue with the gender which naturally leads one to believe that you are somehow viewing it in a sexual light which, as I said in my post, it is not sexual in any way. It's a mother's way to nourish her child and I think this whole worry is rather odd.

But the issue isnt only nursing a girl but for a few of the people who replied including the op the issue is raising a girl full stop. But they have also said this worry will no doubt go away as soon as that baby is here if not before. Ive said through all this that no doubt it will be exactly the same feeding either a male or femle- its just a baby. Then ive over thought things and thought gosh its gona be different from feeding my son. But even that no doubt when the babies here if it is a girl that thought will go completely out of the window and at the end of the day I will just be feeding my baby.
I just dont think theres any need to make someone feel wrong for having a pregnancy worry that we all know will most likely be down to hormones!