Feeling depressed :(

[OhTheJoy]

We have only been actively trying now for 3 cycles but its really getting to me.

I really feel for people who have been trying for months on end and getting no where.

Cycle 1 i got BFP and had a CP so it was a 71 day cycle (didnt bleed until next AF was due)
Cycle 2 BFN.
Im on cycle 3 now.

1 and 2 i ovulated on CD20, 2nd cycle was confirmed with OPK and BBT.

This month ive had a positive OPK for 2 days and now its gone negative again (faint line) Yet ive not ovulated, But its early in my cycle think im CD12.

I just feel like its not going to happen, OH doesnt want me to put pressure on it happening as he feels like BD is being "forced" around ovulation (that sounds horrible but like its a chore not fun- so a lot of the time he says no) he says it will happen when it happens, but im too impatient for that!

I just wish my body had not geared up to ovulate and then didnt! i got my hopes up for them to just come crashing down.

Ive been and had blood tests on CD3 and everything came back as normal, but im still panicking ive got PCOS or something else (i dont know why)

I just get annoyed when it happens so easily for some and not for others

Why cant there be a switch that just turns and BOOM your pregnant!

I need to calm down but dont know how to and really dont want to be getting depressed again, it took me long enough to get off anti-depressants in the first place.

OH thinks im obsessing about it too much, but i cant help it, its in my nature lol

What do you do to take your mind off it? i think about it 99% of the time, i read online that your ovaries could be failing if you get a LH serge and no ovulation, so i am panicking i cant have kids!

Argh! i think i am losing my mind

 

[FarmersWife5]

I hear you!! Its soo stressful. DH & I are our 4th cycle, and my OPKS were a disaster this cycle So pretty sure we are already out. He wants it too, but just tells me itll happen when its meant to be. UGH its meant to be now lol. I am sorry to hear about your chemical that is no good :/.


I wouldn't worry about your ovaries failing, do you mind me asking how old you are?
I know they say it can take a year, however if we get to cycle 6 I may scream lol.

I have just been overly picky on everything I do because we are TTC. DH & I agreed I need to relax. I wont have a drink take Tylenol or anything because I get paranoid. But I honestly think its making me stress more. Im just going to live my life normal, until we actually get a BFP.

Oh yah and Zumba, that is a blast!
Good luck!!

TTC is S-T-R-E-S-S-F-U-L-L !

 

[TTC First]

I totally understand where you are coming from, I was there too. I think that it's in our nature as women to stress about this kinda stuff.

When I first started I would think about TTC 99% of the time and now its only about 90% of the time. lol

I had to make sure that I stayed away from these boards for a while and kept busy. It helped me stress out less.

All the best to you and may this be your last TWW

 

[Wewantourmush]

Hi I feel exactly the same. Im currently trying for #2 and we have been for about 6 months now. I had a chemical pregnancy last month and feel so down like its just not going to happen. I have had one miscarriage and an ectopic too resulting in one tube being removed so I also worry about that. I know exactly how you feel hun. And if you need to talk im here xxx

 

[OhTheJoy]

Cheers! think i know im totally out this month, didnt BD at the right time and i think i may have ovulated as i got a temp increase today, but i had a temp increase at same time last month and it went back down the next day.

Aww i feel for you, does that mean you ovulate every other month? im all new to this so dont really understand what happens etc.

 

[Wewantourmush]

No it just that little bit harder I think. It confuses me sometimes. Do you check your temp everyday? Thats something ive never actually done. What do you actually look out for?xxx

 

[OhTheJoy]

I do my bbt everyday, if your considering it i would sign up to fertility friend and they do a little course explaining how to do it etc. I got my thermometer from amazon cheap just make sure its to 2 decimal places. Its good to let you know you have ovulated just doesn't give advanced warning of it unless you opk too x

 

[Literati_Love]

I totally understand! I am only on my second cycle trying, yet since my first BFN I have been having panic attacks about being infertile and just really despairing... Like, is this ever going to happen? It feels like everyone I know got pregnant on their first try or it was an "oops" so thy didn't even have to try! I am so jealous of "accidents"... It would take so much of the pressure off! And now people keep asking if we're going to have babies soon and I hate it because it's not in our control! I would love to have a baby in 9 months but instead it could be a year before I get pregnant, or more! That is weird that your body prepped to ovulate but then didn't? Do you just know that because your temperature didn't elevate? I hear you about being a struggle to get DH to BD because it becomes a "chore." The pressure seems to get to my husband!