Feeling low still three months after a mc

[Reyrey7]

Hi

I miscarried with my first baby earlier this year. Why does it still hurt when I think about the little bub ?
Mother's Day was pretty tough because I so wanted to be a Mummy. It seems every one else has forgot.

I think it's hard because I had so many plans already and then they are taken away from you.

We are renovating our house at the moment and I work stupid hours, so me and my husband aren't really in the best place either. He is working so hard at work, then working on our house in the evening and at weekends.
So we haven't really had much time to try again for another little bub.

Sometimes I think it may be best to wait until the house is livable to start trying, so at least I can help out painting, moving furniture,etc But then in the next moment I just want to be pregnant again.

I dunno why but I felt so happy being pregnant, I cannot explain it but I guess everyone feels it. Like your not alone. Now I feel so empty.

With all the extra stress, I told my husband today that he doesn't make me feel attractive... Now I feel like a b**ch as he is working so hard, so I dunno how we are meant to have the time for each other. Tonight he went to bed without saying goodnight, which is so unusual for him. But I don't blame him coz I was pretty horrible. I don't mean to push him away.

It's just I want another baby, and I just feel like we cannot ttc until we have sorted out our problems. We have been together 8 half years. Is it normal to feel this way? Or should our relationship still feel exciting and should we still make each other feel attractive ?.

Sorry to waffle.

 

[trinity1100]

It is OK to feel sad. I have a daughter, but I still miss the baby I lost and feel that may be I don't deserve to be a mother again. It is hard to see the tummy not growing, when there should have been a baby. I don't have the freedom to cry anymore. My daughter gets upset when I cry. So I try to push my feelings away.I agree with you, no one remembers the loss we go through. It is all forgotten very quickly. My husband is upset too.but he does not show it to me. He just tells me that god gave us one baby. Try to forget about it. May be your husband is upset and does not want to talk about it. May be he feels hurt he is trying to keep himself busy. Only the mother feels the true sorrow. Even when I have my daughter to cheer me up, I feel like s###. So I understand how you feel. Sometimes miracles happen when you least expect it. I conceived two times in when I was not obsessed about ttc. It is difficult to do that. May be your house renovation will bring about some diversion and change. Hope you get your rainbow baby soon.

 

[trinity1100]

I think that you should talk to your husband about how you feel after the loss. I feel that the changes to your house with the renovation will bring some change and the rainbow baby you deserve.