torch2010
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Hi all, I don't post here often but need some support right now.
October 2003 I had my daughter, perfectly healthy in every way.
January 2007 I had my first miscarriage
August 2008 I had my second miscarriage
October 2008 I had my third miscarriage
August 2009 I found out I was pregnant and terrified, we got to 12 weeks and all was great, baby was bang on dates and we finally started to relax a little. On the 15th of December 2009 at our 20 week scan we were told our little boy was very poorly, he had a condition called hydrops fetalis. We were advised to terminate the pregnancy as I was so ill as well. We didn't, I was his mum, he needed me to keep him safe. They told us he would not survive to 21 weeks, we were scanned every week and every week he was still fighting, even though we knew the end was near we had to keep positive. On the 20th of January we were told he had died. Our lives have been destroyed and we miss our boy so so much.
Christmas day 2010 we find out we are expecting again and I am currently 26+6 with our rainbow baby, a little girl, who is doing so well but I am so so scared.
It took so long to prepare for her, but now we have her nursery ready and her pram and clothes etc but I keep having to remind myself she isn't here yet and I get so sad. I just want to enjoy the next few weeks and I can't.
I have no idea if this is normal or not? I feel guilty for being pregnant so soon after Cai growing his wings.
x
October 2003 I had my daughter, perfectly healthy in every way.
January 2007 I had my first miscarriage
August 2008 I had my second miscarriage
October 2008 I had my third miscarriage
August 2009 I found out I was pregnant and terrified, we got to 12 weeks and all was great, baby was bang on dates and we finally started to relax a little. On the 15th of December 2009 at our 20 week scan we were told our little boy was very poorly, he had a condition called hydrops fetalis. We were advised to terminate the pregnancy as I was so ill as well. We didn't, I was his mum, he needed me to keep him safe. They told us he would not survive to 21 weeks, we were scanned every week and every week he was still fighting, even though we knew the end was near we had to keep positive. On the 20th of January we were told he had died. Our lives have been destroyed and we miss our boy so so much.
Christmas day 2010 we find out we are expecting again and I am currently 26+6 with our rainbow baby, a little girl, who is doing so well but I am so so scared.
It took so long to prepare for her, but now we have her nursery ready and her pram and clothes etc but I keep having to remind myself she isn't here yet and I get so sad. I just want to enjoy the next few weeks and I can't.
I have no idea if this is normal or not? I feel guilty for being pregnant so soon after Cai growing his wings.
x