Feeling weird.

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by petal040, Dec 19, 2009.

  1. petal040

    petal040 Guest

    Kind of a pointless thread but just wanted to share something I'm experiencing...

    LO has recently started to go to bed earlier than me. Up until recently, we all went together at 10pm. We co-slept for a while until she started moving around then she went into her cot beside me with no problems. I had started trying to move her bedtime forward 5 mins per night because I wanted to have some time without her in the evenings (she is bf and won't accept milk from anything other than me - so I am always with her, and really wanted to just have some time without her with me and without worrying that she might get hungry!).

    That plan didn't really work - we got to 9.30 but that was all - and I was still going to bed with her. Then - suddenly - a few days ago she started getting tired around 8.30pm. I tried putting her to bed and lo and behold it worked!

    So - for four nights in a row she has been up asleep in bed between 8.30 and 9pm, while I have been downstairs.

    The thing is - now it's happening - I feel strangely uncomfortable about it. I worry that she is feeling sad up there because she is alone (which is stupid - because she is asleep - and if she cried I would go up straight away).

    I am also still going to bed at 10pm on the dot because I worry that she is up there, being good, waiting for me to come at 10 as usual - and that if I don't come she will feel sad because she is waiting and nobody is coming :cry:

    I love her so much. Can you love someone too much? Lol...

    I guess I'll get used to it in time.

    I've been thinking a lot about going back to work too. I am actually really looking forward to it, but have been thinking about how I would like her care to be while she is with her childminder (e.g. I want them to be understanding if she is still bf, I might like to try blw etc). I think I just want to feel reassured that everything will be okay.

    It's weird. :)
     
  2. steph1505

    steph1505 Well-Known Member

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    Awww! Ur so sweet! I know what you mean about feeling weird when they go to bed! I sit on the couch like "what now?" I think we just get so used to them being so reliant and constantly having to attend to them that when they are in bed we dont know what to do with ourselves!

    But dont worry yourself, she is asleep all cosied up in bed all happy! I really dont think she will be lying awake feeling sad! Im pretty sure if she was...u would know about it!!

    And I cant really help with the breastfeeding part because I formula feed Brandon but when you go back to work, just make sure that you are comfortable with whoever is caring for ur LO! :D

    x x x
     
  3. petal040

    petal040 Guest

    Lol... thanks... on a sensible level I know she is fine, but it's like a weird kind of irrational silly thing...

    If I'm like this now I wonder what I'll be like when she leaves home hahaha :)
     
  4. zoe0504

    zoe0504 Well-Known Member

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    HI, i had the same feelings, Oliver went up to bed early at around 4-6 weeks. I was constantly running up to check he was ok in our big bedroom all alone. i imagine if he woke up he'd look at me and say 'hey i was sleeping, do you mind!!!'. I think just as much as our babies have separation anxiety, we do too! Especially when they start sleeping through, you feel not needed as much! I get lost of an evening once Oliver's down for the night, around 7 till 6, it;s quite boring without him!
    I too am battling with work, they have told me i can't go back part time, i have to go full time.Part time my family could look after him but not if i went back full. I am SOOOO unhappy with this as i morally disagree with baby's going to childminding or daycare. Don't get me wrong anybody who does it, it's their choice but i feel that at 7 months old Oliver is still going to need me. I want to teach him all the little things like waving and kissing and playing games,not somebody else who I hardly know let alone Oliver.
    Am i alone in feeling like this??? Sorry for rambling, i think i needed to get that off my chest!!! hehe!!
    x x x
     
  5. petal040

    petal040 Guest

    Don't worry about rambling - I do it all the time haha...

    I would love to be there for LO until she is older too but financially it's unrealistic. I enjoy work so am looking forward to being back but not looking forward to not being with her - I need two of me! :)

    I think I share your feelings in a way :)
     
  6. zoe0504

    zoe0504 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks! I would love to go back to work as it's a bit of me time, able to talk with friends and do what i do best! (apart from being a mummy and a wifey!) I enjoy what i do but i think it would be so hard for me to jump back in full time. Obviously financially it would be a great help but i'm trying to think my way around the situation! Too many decisions!
    I'd like to think it gets easier as mom and baby settle into a routine with work and care, just too afraid to try it out!
    Good Luck to you x x x
     

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