I had my daughter Ava 3 months ago but recently I cant get my feelings about the birth out of my head. I had an emergenct section following an induction that didnt go to plan. It was quite traumatic of course as I'm sure they all are and that is part of it but the hardest thing I am finding is that I was delivered under general anaesthetic which means that I wasnt really present for the birth as such. I know that the most important thing is that me and my daughter are both alive and well which is all I thought of at first but now I cant stop feeling upset that I have no memory of her arrival into the world. I remember clearly being wheeled up to the ward to see her and being accutley aware that she already had her little sleepsuit on - I know this sounds weird but something inside me felt the need to see her properly without her clothes as she would have been when born. I was not offered skin to skin and was too grogy to thin of asking. I feel I missed out on something I cannot replace. Has anyone else had similar feelings? I dont know how commonly general anaestheic is used, I believe it was ecause I have a low platelet count which apparantly rules out epidural.