FOB seeing LO

[laura1991]

so me and FOB go back to college on monday, we have been trying to sort arrangements for him seeing lily, so i said tuesday 3-6 because shes in bed for 7 and friday overnight till 5 oclock saturday, he said im being unfair and taking lily aways from him he wants monday 3-6 thursday overnight and 9-6 on saturday, i said this was un fair on lily because she will be in nursery all day and she doesnt want to be going backwards and forward

i think im being fair
what do you think?
xx

 

[JoJo16]

i wouldnt even let my fob have alice over night so i dont think ur being unreasonable atall. i dont really no ur situation tho :/ x

 

[trumpetbum]

You're taking her away from him because it isn't the times he wants? Sorry but you're her main caregiver and know when the least disruptive for her. I'd tell him politely that you don't want it to be a cause of unease between you both but that overnights during the week, away from her main home aren't an option while she attends nursery and that this is for her benefit, not yours or his
You could maybe leave it open to negotiation for another couple of hours during the week if he feels that he needs more but I totally see where you are coming from with regards to Thursday nights.
I also agree that many people wouldn't allow overnights so you're not being unreasonable imo.

 

[totallyashley]

I am not planning to let FOB have Daisy over night for a long time! In fact I have to be there for all foreseeable visits! I think you are being pretty fair. I don't want to be mean or anything but the first thing that came to my mind is that he wants his Friday and Saturday nights out...

 

[annawrigley]

I think you're being fair! I wouldn't allow Noah to stay there overnight but then again i don't know how capable your FOB is. xxx

 

[wishuwerehere]

I think you're being more than reasonable, as you can see overnight access isn't common for a young baby - and you should tell him that!
We're back to uni in less than a month and I'm dreading this conversation with him...he doesn't seem to get that nursery is costing me £500 a month and it would be totally unsettling for her if he just sauntered up there and took her out whenever he's free and he fancies it. *sigh*

 

[Serene123]

You're being more than fair, tell him it's that or nothing!

 

[mommieoftwo]

I was one of the few that did let FOB have my baby overnight.
He only had her friday nights though and pretty much saw her whenever in the day because we were still together.
And when we had Lanie we were living together and married.
I dont think you're being unreasonable at all hun x

 

[laura1991]

Hes a great dad, ill give him that, he looked after lily so i could stay at college but he end ed up depressed and became to controlling, i don't want to take lily away from him so thats why i said one night overnight even though it will be hard for me, he sees us both as equals, he doesnt see that babies need there mums more xxx

 

[Kailynnsmommy]

FOB see Kailynn 2 days a week for 2 hours each and thats it. I will not let him have her overnight for a very long time, if ever