French children don't throw food

[Pielette]

Has anyone been watching This Morning today?
They were just talking about this book that an American woman (married to a Frenchman and living in France) has published about the things the French apparently do better than the British.
Firstly, it says that the French don't feel bad about formula feeding, namely because men feel left out by breastfeeding. Well I'm a formula feeder myself but not through choice and not because my husband felt left out!
Secondly, French children are apparently better behaved because the French are stricter. Thoughts?
And lastly, we should all be thinking of our husbands and getting back to being 'sexy wives' as soon as possible. I'm back at the gym but simply because it makes me feel good! Not because I decided I should be returning to being a 'sexy wife'!

 

[Ozzieshunni]

What a load of crap! What is up with this TV program? First the BFing shite and now this?

 

[darkangel1981]

Yeah watched it.... dunno what i think lol

 

[Raven24]

I literally just caught the very end of it, so basically we should all smack our children, formula feed so our partners dont feel left out and on top of that make ourselves as sexy as possible to please our partners?? Is she for real i think she needs to get a grip and it seems ot me thwt she i valuing her husband higher than her children. How do books like this grt published

 

[Harleyy]

She's n idiot.

I ff. And even I can't believr she said that about bf,
See now I'm thinking this....
Some lady somewhere in the world, was watching this, pregnant, she is going to believe it.

 

[darkangel1981]

Oh yes i forgot about the being a mother doesn't come first bit......

 

[Pielette]

I literally just caught the very end of it, so basically we should all smack our children, formula feed so our partners dont feel left out and on top of that make ourselves as sexy as possible to please our partners?? Is she for real i think she needs to get a grip and it seems ot me thwt she i valuing her husband higher than her children. How do books like this grt published

Apparently so. Damn I was doing it all wrong, putting my child ahead of everything Thank God this book is here to help me!

 

[mum22ttc#3]

I see the first minute or so but didn't bother watching after that, what a pile of crap.

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Their husbands help out with feeds? REALLY? Amazing!

 

[Green Lady]

Lol, DH used to complain that he couldn't feed the baby, but now that we're weaning he doesn't want to feed her. And if he wants me to be a 'sexy wife' while running on 4 hours sleep a night, he'd better shell out for some major spa days!

 

[midori1999]

I didn't see it, but France has one of the worst rates at uptake of BF in the developed world. In general (because not all!) breasts are viewed 'for your husband, not your babies' (direct quote by French paediatrician!) and it is thought of as anti-feminist to BF.

My SIL is French and she is very strict, but I don't think her child is any better behaved than mine. He also wakes at night still at 18 months and they have resorted to actually drugging him (were originally given medication to make him sleep abroad, English GP won't give it to them so they still get it from abroad) to make him sleep.

My niece is French (sister grew up in France from a toddler, married to a Frenchman and niece born and brought up in France) and she is spoilt and appalingly behaved.

 

[Fergie]

I watched it in a manky pair of trackies, sloppy jumper and holy socks after FF Boo and watching her play in her porridge .. so i'm not the perfect mother then .

 

[Xuxa]

i know i'm gonna be bashed for this, but it's my opinion so here goes...

I BF DD1 exclusively for over two years - first 12 months only breast no solids, from there breast and solids. This time i am exclusively FF.
I do agree that it's much better not only for my relationship with OH but also his relationship with his daughter. And yes, he does feed her mostly during the day but if i need it during the night too.

Do i agree that we have to be a bit strict with our children to make sure they are well behaved? Absolutely!!! I know i've got a really well behaved 4 year old, that is still a child but knows how to behave herself. Kids need to know their boundaries and when they are crossing the line.

Now the part about being sexy for your husband. I agree 100%! I'm sorry, but i would hate it if my OH stopped being the person i am attracted too. And yes, he is a father but he is my husband too, so he better not forget that! I love feelign sexy for him, i love that he still feels attracted to me and please don't hate me for saying this but i do believe that i'm a wife before being a mother and being a happy wife makes my kids happy. They know they are in a safe environment, that their parents love esch other and nothing not even them will rock that.
Like my OH says, me and him together can make kids, him and kids together can't make another one of me.

Saying this, i do know how when you're BF that is the last thing on your mind. So, maybe what the woman said doesn't apply to your reality or what you believe in but i guess that people that think like her (i guess like me too) like to know they are not bad mothers for thinking that way.

 

[lozzy21]

What a load of poo, why should I make myself nice for my husband? If my partner only finds me attractive when my hair and makeup are done and when I'm wearing nice clothes then I dont think I really want to be with them.

 

[Ozzieshunni]

My DH told me he's attracted to me whether I'm scruffy in PJs or all dressed up. It doesn't matter to him.

 

[vintage67]

Sweeping generalizations will always upset people.

There are well behaved/misbehaved children all over the world.

 

[Pielette]

My husband's the same, it makes no difference to him whether I'm dressed up or not, he still tries it on I do make an effort myself, I've started exercising properly again and I like to look my best, but to be honest it's for my benefit and he loves me just as I am, whether that's slobbing around the house in my trackie bottoms or wearing a nice dress.
Personally I don't think it's fair to encourage women to FF just so their partners can feel involved. As I said before I FF but it wasn't a choice I wanted to make, and my husband told me that he would support whatever I decided to do. And he bonds with our son in all sorts of ways, not just through feeding, through baths, changing him and playing with him. I don't agree with that as a reason to not breastfeed. If I could I would be breastfeeding right now, sadly that isn't the case. I do agree with the whole not feeling guilty thing though, so many of us beat ourselves up for it when we did absolutely everything we could to get breastfeeding going properly.

 

[buddyIV]

I didn't see the show, but I read an article in the paper about it. I thought she sounded pretty ignorant about certain things...has she met all the kids in the UK and France, such that she could make a sweeping statement like "French children aren't as fussy about food"? My DS is an amazing eater, and because we eat at the table everyday, his behaviour when we eat out is great! Plus, throwing things from a height is part of a child's development: learning about object permanence and the physical forces of gravity. If they're not throwing some food out of their highchairs, they must be throwing something from somewhere!!! Bang goes her theory on that one! And I'm sure we could all find exceptions to her rules.

I just find it hard to believe anything that makes such a massive generalisation about parenting styles, I mean even in the microcosm of BnB we have a huge range of different parental attitudes and parenting methods.
That being said, I know we can make certain assumptions based on cultural differences. But they're just that: assumptions! They're certainly not facts!

Whilst I do happen to think it's important to make an effort for your partner, I'd never put make-up before play-time with LO! Plus, it's pretty inconsistent to say BF is anti-feminist, and yet prioritising your husbands sexual needs above all else isn't???

Yikes: sorry for the essay

 

[Jetset]

I read an article on this with loads of extracts of the book and I have to say I think some of it is fantastic. I am planning on buying the book as a lot of what they wrote (in the article) are things I have been doing anyway.

Don't get me wrong, there are bits which I don't agree with, but I think that is everything you read!

 

[Xuxa]

i didn't mean that i wear make up and do my hair for him... I never wear make up unless it's for a special ocasion and i have curly long hair, so never do anything to my hair either. But i like to feel good about myself and i the better i feel about myself the more confident i feel the better my life is.

Now, this time i am not FF by choice either (or maybe kind of...) but i'm not unhappy at all!! in fact i quite en joy it. But so does he, which is awesome.

Anyway ladies, it's just a tv show and one woman's opinion. i wouldn't have been so upset by it only because i agree with to some extent i guess...

don't be so offended by people saying that your husbands should be important. we all love our kids, but in a way they chose us, we did n't choose them. but we chose our partners and when our kids are gone, it's the two of you left.