Funniest Toddler Stories!

[Button#]

In the mornings OH gets up with Ashley and I get an extra hour in bed. If he asks for me he tells him mummy's asleep it's the morning. This morning he asked for me and OH said mummy's asleep to which Ashley replies it's morning. Can't believe they're ganging up on me.

 

[mummy2be...]

Yesterday rel came up to me and asked really apprehensively (because she didn't think she stood a chance)
"Mummy please can I go out and play in the rain (head down no eye contact)
So I said "yeah rel of course you can"
A look of pure joy spread over her face and she said
"Oh mummy, your SUCH a good parent"

Lol !!

 

[Natsku]

you are SUCH a good parent!!!

I sent Maria to play outside the other day and told her she could ring the doorbell to let me know when she wanted to come back in but she decided that it meant she could also ring the doorbell to let me know when she didn't want to come back in so every few minutes she'd ring the doorbell, I'd open the door and she'd shout "I'm not coming in!!" and push the door shut and run off to play

 

[Natsku]

I asked Maria today why she hadn't pooped all weekend and she informed me that she's saving her poop for daycare so that I don't have to change her stinky nappy - what a great kid!

 

[Groovychick]

Natsku!

Fre was having a bath and her younger brother decided to investigate. As soon as he entered the bathroom and did a HUGE fart. Fre immediately declared "Joshua, watch the attitude with your bottom!"

I nearly died laughing!

 

[Bevziibubble]

I asked Maria today why she hadn't pooped all weekend and she informed me that she's saving her poop for daycare so that I don't have to change her stinky nappy - what a great kid!

Hahaha! What a good girl to think of mummy like that! Poor daycare, though!

 

[Natsku]

at the attitude with the bottom!

 

[Reidfidleir]

I finally have one lol.
I heard him trip and tumble a bit over his feet in the kitchen (I was cooking two feet away) but I didn't pay any mind because I could tell it was nothing.
Then I hear him say: "hep me! Hep me! Hep me!" First time I've heard him say that!
So I turn around and see him half laying down with one arm raised pitifully towards me. Hahaha! Looks like he's got a flair for the dramatics!

 

[Gemmamuk]

I've just walked in to find Alex trying to breastfed his doll!!
He's obviously spent too much time watching me feed his baby brother 😂

 

[Groovychick]

Joshua was watching my Dad drinking a spritzer and declared very adamantly"share!"

 

[emrhian91]

This is hilarious
Definitely subscribing

 

[BabyMamma93]

M is in between toddler and baby but he is so comical.

i have 3 dogs, lets just say i cant feed them while he is in the room, firstly bcos one of them is scared of the sound of metal moving, and his food bowl is metal (no we dont do it to torment him haha) anyway M has to go over to the bowl, they all move away he then proceeds to feeding them one bit of food at a time. its a good job they are patient.

then when they give up, he grabs a handful this time and puts it in his mouth!

when he eats his food he puts his face in his bowl and tries eating like a dog.

funny but not funny, i was in my bedroom folding some clothes, i put Ms toy box in his room so he could play while i do the clothes, next thing i head a small bang and M starting to cry, i look into his room to find him head first inside the toy box -.- he did this before with a toy car he has, toppled straight in.

when my OH asks him 'where are all your girlfriends, he points to the door and says 'there'

he thinks he plays xbox when he has the controller when OH is playing, then he walks off, remembers he is 'playing' and runs back in front of the tv to play again.

he also loves my bitch, she has had a litter of pups so is very maternal anyway, he goes to her face and tries to scrunch it with his hands making all sorts of random noises like hes trying to say 'tickle tickle' like i say to him.

whenever i smell his feet and say 'oohh they stink' he grabs them and sucks his big toe

 

[BabyMamma93]

After we got my DD used to peeing on the potty we started with trying to get her comfortable with using the big toilet, just incase we we're ever out and about and didn't have access to a potty. She was quite happy to sit on the big toilet but being quite short she really struggled with getting on but being independent she didn't want any help. So I brought a stool to stand on so she could get herself up.

Me, DH and DD were playing in the garden one day when she declares she needs a wee, this is the conversation

DD: Mummy I need a wee wee but I need to use my big toilet
Me: Ok darling would you like me to come with you?
DD: No I can do it myself
Me: Ok well give me a shout if you need me, you can use your stool to do a wee

Off she goes, 2 minutes or so later she comes back down

DD: Mummy there's wee wee on the floor but it was an accident, come and see

So I go up to the toilet and sure enough there's wee all over the floor

Me: Oh dear that's a bit of a mess what happened here
DD: I did it but it was just an accident
Me: That's ok we can clean it up, what happened did you miss the toilet
DD: No.... I did a wee on the stool like you told me too
Me:

oh my, that is just too funny!!!!

 

[Torsornin]

they animated it too! it is on netflix!

 

[Groovychick]

My daughter stopped at the top of the stairs this morning and informed me "Hurry up Mummy, I'm not waiting until Christmas".

 

[MelliPaige]

He puts his hands I his mouth and yells for daddy, if he doesn't answer Leo says daddy stuck lol

 

[Rhea Santiago]

I like it when my son makes her baby sister laugh. He just said a while ago that he doesn't want her sister to join a Miss Universe Pageant because he doesn't want her sister to get naked. Lol. He doesn't want to see her sister wear swimsuit because for him its already naked and said her sister has nothing to wear so many people will actually see her body. He's really a sweet and overprotective brother. We just laughed while he's very serious talking.

 

[WackyMumof2]

I was on the way home from town the other night and DS2 asked me where about in the family he fit in. I was honest and told him blankly, oh your the middle child, Christopher is your big brother, Alexander is your little brother so you're in the middle. Well, I wish I'd kept my mouth closed because then I'm dealing with a screaming 7 year old who is demanding life isn't fair and he doesn't want to be the middle child anymore. I told him it didn't matter if he was second born for the 40th born, if there was someone older and younger than him, he was still in the middle regardless. The more he argued, the more ridiculous his claim became and the harder I laughed. Told him that his behaviour was 'stupid'. We get home 20 minutes later and he came running into Dad saying 'Mum said I was stupid' when that wasn't what I said at all. Lol. But I was telling MIL last night and she didn't believe me so I told him he was the middle child and as you guessed it, he broke down into a hysterical mess. Lol.

 

[Parkep]

My youngest has a fascination with Dora the explorer. She is the most active kid Ive ever seen, put on Dora? She's a zombie haha. Anyways, we were all in our room watching cartoons one morning with the door shut. She kept walking up to it and saying something. About the third time I asked my husband what open in Spanish was, sure enough that's what she was saying.. Her babbling now makes so much more sense, it's half Spanish! Lol