funny things you sed whilst in labour

[SophiasMummy]

thought would start a thread on some of the things we may remaber saying whilst in labour generaly when on gas and air etc. heres mine

the one thing i remember saying is in reply to my mum she told me the gas and air was my new best friend to which i replied actually the gas and air is like -friend 1- it will do for now until something better comes along and that my epi will be like -friend 2- the trusty friend who i wanted and was waiting for. lmao i only remembered that i sed this about 2 days ago

 

[FayDanielle]

About Gas and air I shouted
'Oh god, I feel drunk! Get some of this girls, cheapest night Ive ever had'

I was in a room with 3 other girls and there other halves until 53 minutes before Mia was born!
Will add some more!
x

 

[Dragonfly]

I started to call my cat for some reason, I remember it and telling my other half to get the cat. Then I told my OH I hated him. nice lol

 

[bbyno1]

I don't think i said anything funny

 

[dizzymeg]

i didnt use the G and A that much during labour but was sucking it for dear life when i had my stiches, so it was just me, OH and midwife, but I was saying that I havnt been drunk for ages, and they they should sell the stuff! haha

 

[smokey]

just as im told they can see the head
"please dont tell me its ginger"
turn around to realise my student mw is ginger.

being wheeled to the delivery room
"dont forget my gas ladyyyyyyy"

when they tried to get me to move to another bed I had a go at a nurse while I was hugging the pillow half asleep.
I told her to get off and go find her own pillow this ones mine.

 

[cabaretmum2b]

The MW told me to get in the bath as it would help the pain, and it made me feel worse. I shouted from the bathroom "She said I'd feel better, and I don't! Where's that lying bitch gone???"
And then, also from the bathroom (most of my labour was spent on the loo until my epidural!) I heard OH say to my mum "I feel like I'm in a play that I haven't rehearsed" and I shouted "That's such a GAY thing to say!!!"
And when I was induced, I was given a painkiller that made me really woozy, and when I saw the TOCO contractino thing go up on my monitor, I shouted "RING THAT TOCO BELL!" and laughed for about 3 minutes. At the time, I'd decided "Ring that taco bell" was the taco bell motto, and it was only afterwards I realised it wasn't.

 

[LulaBug]

I had been pushing fruitlessly for over an hour, had been in labour for almost 55 hours and was doped up on gas and air, was knackered and I remembered screaming at the top of my lungs "EUTHANISE ME, PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY" over and over!

 

[2016]

The first time they examined me in labour I was 10cm dialated and I asked if there was any chance labour would stop now.
While on all fours I said I felt like a farm animal so yelled out "MOOOOOOO" while pushing a few times (it helped!) :cow:
I hugged my bump and wailed that I would miss it and wasn't ready to say goodbye.
When I first saw LO crowning (I was using a birthing mirror) I burst into tears and said "oh wow he's perfect! I love him so much!!!"
Apparently between pushes I would mutter under my breath "Easy, easy this is easy" followed shortly by "Come on Squiggle, we can do this!!" as the next urge came. Squiggle was my bumps name btw.

 

[Nut_Shake]

Hmm...

I told my hubby he was being insensitive because he was sending a message whilst i was having contractions and he should be stroking my hair.

The midwife that tried to make me give natural birth after we had already decided that i was having a caesarean was told to 'f*** off and give me my caesarean!' ( i very nearly kicked her in the head too)

Whilst waiting for the anaesthetist to put in my spinal block i actually started begging her to hurry up. Actually begged

Once the spinal block took effect i thanked each and every one of the people in the operating theatre for being there for me

 

[FayDanielle]

I was put into a wheelchair from a labour suite to delivery ward.
Just before I was sat on the toilet, and telling the midwives I wanted to push even though they said I wasnt in labour, they soon changed their minds!

Well I had a man push me upstairs and I shouted 'Run Tony, RUNNN'!

I apologised at 3am that morning when he wheeled me and Mia onto postnatal!
x

 

[Nut_Shake]

 

[Dragonfly]

I had been pushing fruitlessly for over an hour, had been in labour for almost 55 hours and was doped up on gas and air, was knackered and I remembered screaming at the top of my lungs "EUTHANISE ME, PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY" over and over!

In my first labour I screamed to be put down.

 

[Nut_Shake]

just as im told they can see the head
"please dont tell me its ginger"
turn around to realise my student mw is ginger.

being wheeled to the delivery room
"dont forget my gas ladyyyyyyy"

when they tried to get me to move to another bed I had a go at a nurse while I was hugging the pillow half asleep.
I told her to get off and go find her own pillow this ones mine.

 

[shel030785]

I complained that the pool water was dirty and that they should have better cleaners! (the dirt i was refering to was coming from me,,,,,, my plug etc)

The midwife also brought me some toast during the earlier stages of labour and told me to eat it before she came back as my energy was low. I ate it all and when she came back in the room she said well done and i shouted 'I didnt eat it my husband pinched it all?' I have no idea why i said it and poor hubby looked so embarrased bless him.

Im sure there is many more
xxx

 

[Lyndz]

I was completely drunk on the gas and air to the point it was making me hallucinate. I said to my DH and my mum:

"I've just seen that i was in the drive through at McDonalds and there was a hamburger on the path and it had an actual cow in it. In the bun".

Then the midwife came to examine me and when she left i went:

"Psssssst.... Did you see that midwife.... She was in the hamburger".

Whilst pushing with all my might i said to the midwife:

"Just get stuck in! Get in there and pull her out!"

 

[louandivy]

I told my boyfriend that I thought I was going to poo myself approximately 395832985098502 times during my 11 hour labour

 

[Nut_Shake]

just as im told they can see the head
"please dont tell me its ginger"
turn around to realise my student mw is ginger.

being wheeled to the delivery room
"dont forget my gas ladyyyyyyy"

when they tried to get me to move to another bed I had a go at a nurse while I was hugging the pillow half asleep.
I told her to get off and go find her own pillow this ones mine.

I was completely drunk on the gas and air to the point it was making me hallucinate. I said to my DH and my mum:

"I've just seen that i was in the drive through at McDonalds and there was a hamburger on the path and it had an actual cow in it. In the bun".

Then the midwife came to examine me and when she left i went:

"Psssssst.... Did you see that midwife.... She was in the hamburger".

Whilst pushing with all my might i said to the midwife:

"Just get stuck in! Get in there and pull her out!"

I told my boyfriend that I thought I was going to poo myself approximately 395832985098502 times during my 11 hour labour

i am DYING HERE!!! Hahahahahaha

 

[Torz]

i kept going on about a tv programme i used to watch with my cousin on a sunday morning at my graddads called the land of the geints but i couldnt remember the name of it at the time. i just kept rambling about little people in grass, god the things that come to mind when in the throes of labour lol

 

[KittyVentura]

Mine were all to do with pain relief lol.

"I feel like I'm paused!" - First taste of G&A

"My Fingers are sausages - I need Mummy... or an ambulance!" - G&A again. Pretty impressed that I managed to quote the inbetweeners whilst in labour

"I won't lie to you Michael - I really like the G&A. It's like that park of a really good night out where you're drunk enough to be everyone's friend but not so drunk that people hate you yet!" - To my anesthetist (sp?)

"I love you Michael... you gave me the best thing ever... until the baby is here... but for now... I love you!" - After my epi

xx