grrrrr i don't want your negative opinions of just do one!!!

[missmayhem]

what is it with people since i reviled i'm pregnant all i have got is

ohh you don;t want to breast feed it does the baby no good, formula was invented for a reason

hypnobirthing is a load of crap, you'll be screaming for drugs just you wait and see

cloth nappies, ha that won't last

you'll hate baby in your room, you'll have it in it's own room by the 2nd night

ahh you say that now but just you wait till your in labour, then you won;t want all that hippy stuff.......

don't bother with a birth plan it all goes out the window (if the fact i may be allergic to pethidine goes out the window, i'm gonna bloody well worry)


i'm just fed up to the back teeth of people not supporting me.

the fact is they know sweet FA about any of what they are talking about....... none of them have even looked up hypnobirthing

its like nobody wants me to succed in what i want.....

my mum was hell for it untill i sat her down and explained everything to her now she's full supporting me, and loves my new fluff stash.....

but as for everyone else!

arrggg i just want to shake them and yell at them, its my life my body what has it got to do with you

 

[Nyn]

it's lovely getting unwanted advice isn't it?!

Stick to your guns hun, you soon learn who you can talk to and who you can't. Third time round for me and I'm still getting comments and 'advice'.

 

[Tampa]

Good rant!
It's hard to just take these comments on the chin, isn't it? I've heard all the above about natal hypnotherapy - "that'll go out the window when labour starts". Why do people feel the need to share their negative "pearls of wisdom"?
Now it's expressing breastmilk "you won't manage it, your oh won't be interested in feeding the baby etc".

Our births, our babies, our lives!

Aaaargh

...and relax! (hurray for those relaxation techniques

 

[mummylove]

what is it with people since i reviled i'm pregnant all i have got is

ohh you don;t want to breast feed it does the baby no good, formula was invented for a reason

hypnobirthing is a load of crap, you'll be screaming for drugs just you wait and see

cloth nappies, ha that won't last

you'll hate baby in your room, you'll have it in it's own room by the 2nd night

ahh you say that now but just you wait till your in labour, then you won;t want all that hippy stuff.......

don't bother with a birth plan it all goes out the window (if the fact i may be allergic to pethidine goes out the window, i'm gonna bloody well worry)


i'm just fed up to the back teeth of people not supporting me.

the fact is they know sweet FA about any of what they are talking about....... none of them have even looked up hypnobirthing

its like nobody wants me to succed in what i want.....

my mum was hell for it untill i sat her down and explained everything to her now she's full supporting me, and loves my new fluff stash.....

but as for everyone else!

arrggg i just want to shake them and yell at them, its my life my body what has it got to do with you

Just ignore it hun. Through one ear out the other. I know its hard to ignore. Even if things dont work out how u plan least u can try and do it ur way

 

[missmayhem]

it's got to the stage i'm just gonna tell people to butt out and mind their own business if i want advise i will ask for it, best of it is one of the couples don't even have any kids....

OH's family are totally ignoring the fact i'm pregnant bar digs at how i'm gonna fail (that and blocking the toilet door going pisssshh pissh pisssh and other annoying water sounds)


i may not believe in what my friends or family are doing but i support them 100% regardless as that what friends are for

 

[GilmoreGirl]

ohh you don;t want to breast feed it does the baby no good, formula was invented for a reason

I remember getting this one when I was pregnant the first time! Still makes me mad! I remember people saying that I was going to "starve" my "poor little baby". I exclusively breastfed both of my children and they were BOTH always in the 98th and 99th percentiles for weight... so I'm PRETTY sure they weren't coming anywhere close to starving.

People need to learn to filter what they say... especially to a pregnant woman! We're going through enough!

 

[miss.anna]

It really annoys me too...just because you're pregnant people feel they have a right to ask you anything...

'are you going to breastfeed?' etc etc I just feel like saying what the f**k has it got to do with you!!!

'do you know what you're having?'

'have you got a name?'

'when are you due?'

zzzzzzz I feel like making a sign and walking round with it on my head saying GIRL, EVA, 10TH OCT

'are you fed up?' yes I am actually...fed up of random strangers asking me the same questions!!!!!

Rant over lol.

 

[missmayhem]

ohh you need to start thinking of names

why don't you want to share your names

arggggggg

the later is usually followed by, you called your dog Bear, what a stupid name for a dog i'm gonna call him backside as in bear backside..... and you think i'm sharing my babies name with you

 

[franny_k]

I hate to say it but this is only the start. "Well intentioned" people will also offer plenty of "advice" on the best way to raise our children, too, without thinking for a second that what they're saying is a)ignorant and b) offensive. However, "well intentioned" people cannot have been raised very well themselves, for they are seriously lacking in two departments: empathy and an open mind.

You stick to your guns because you will ALWAYS know what is best for your child regardless because you're the MUM!
xx

 

[Cashewnut]

Ive learnt to ignore the crap, I cant breastfeed, so when people ask and I say im bottle feeding, I get all the lectures under the sun, when in fact I would love to try, but the pain would be unbearable and just not worth it, makes me feel even worse though!

Its your birth, and your baby, so entirely your choice!

 

[Leopard]

ohh you don;t want to breast feed it does the baby no good, formula was invented for a reason

--- Lol whut? Breastfeeding is healthier than formulae! xD As for pethadine allergies, im codiene which means I cannot have it either

 

[Rainie]

You know i love the fact that as soon as you get pregnant everyone has a oppinion, a idea and they seem only to happy to bug the hell out of you with it. When i found out i was pregnant this time had all the unwanted crap they give you and in the end i snapped and told them to stay the hell out my life as what i needed more than anything was there support and guidance more than them moaning about my choices or trying to change my mind. IT was bad enough coming to a dicision without worrying about what every tom, dick and harry had to say about it and just because if they had kids and needed every drug going does not mean we will!!!

some of the woman on here amaze me as they did not have drugs, had the birth they wanted with no pain relief and loved it! so that is inspiration for us to stick to our guns!

hell i am having a c section and was told dont take a birth plan,...... stuff that mine is two pages long and i have a natural birth one incase i go naturally lol.

 

[missmayhem]

i can take codine, oramorph but so cna my mum and grandad


i know forumla is a great substitute if you cannot BF, but mothers should be support no matter what they choose.

 

[janeybaby]

Just take no notice peple always offer their advice and not everyone has the same opinions so what works for one doesn't for another!!!

I would agree with the birthplan one though..... for me when I had my first I didn't stick to it at all and would say I was deluded when I wrote it and didn't bother with 2nd and 3rd and won't be doing one this time either however for you and your allergy its a must so do what you want and don't let others tell you otherwise

 

[Rainie]

ohh you don;t want to breast feed it does the baby no good, formula was invented for a reason

--- Lol whut? Breastfeeding is healthier than formulae! xD As for pethadine allergies, im codiene which means I cannot have it either

rofl ok yes formula food is getting better and better with each new idea they have and they do keep working on there formula to be as good as breast milk but it never will be AS GOOD or BETTER as it is impossible to. I personally am formula feeding because i cannot breast feed i dunno my brain will not let me and not only that i am top heavy it scares me so as i didnt with my daughter wont be with him. But if i could have expressed it i would but seems little point to doing that.

Some peoples comments do make me laugh!!!

 

[Mazzy]

What I don't understand is why is going natural on all things considered "hippy?" Why do people view nature in such a negative light?

I would venture to guess these are the same people who didn't want to deal with taking care of a child in the first place, so they turned their efforts over to the easiest possible thing and/or if they even tried the natural way in the first place and gave up pretty easily, then it's probably the reason why they want everyone else to fail. Because if you succeed where they failed, then you might just prove to them that they are weak.

I'm not saying that if you try the natural way and give up that you're weak...I'm saying that these people who go on and on about it being too "hippy" must somehow feel they've failed in some way. I guess I just see it as a sort of jealousy.

If you don't try to do things the natural way, then you can't criticize someone else who does. And if you try to do things the natural way, but give up, that is your choice. There will always be people who can get through certain obstacles and people who, for whatever reason, are unable to. You never know which way life will take you until you go through it. So why not just try anyway? Seems silly to tell people "bah humbug."

 

[Kirstiedenman]

definitely know how you feel its like when people find out your pregnant there is no holding back and there opinions are the only ones that count!!! It is so frustrating! I have had so many people with omg you have to read this book and oh really thats how your going to do this and ha see how much your husband helps when baby arrives! grr its so annoying that apparently everyones else's birth and mother experience is what mine is going to be like but every pregnancy is different and every child and mother is different so everyone has the right to do what suits them. Very frustrating I just tell them now I dont have any way of how I want to do things I will just do what feels natural to me and just change the subject if they continue to talk about it.

 

[Celesse]

If you decided you wanted to FF, have an epidural, use disposable nappies and put baby in thier own room straight away you would also come up against "comments". And it gets worse when they are here.

Parenting is a very emotive issue. What works for one family doesn't work for another. What works for one generation doesn't always work for the next generation and advice changes as we find out more. And everyone thinks you should be doing in thier way, especially when they have children and you don't yet, or when your children haven't reached the same age as thier children. And they feel insulted if you don't follow thier oh so expereienced advice. My advice, politly listen, smile and nod and then ignore them.

 

[Louisex]

I can't believe people would say those things. I can't imagine any one of my family or friends saying things like that to me x

 

[sun]

I hate to say it but this is only the start. "Well intentioned" people will also offer plenty of "advice" on the best way to raise our children, too, without thinking for a second that what they're saying is a)ignorant and b) offensive. However, "well intentioned" people cannot have been raised very well themselves, for they are seriously lacking in two departments: empathy and an open mind.

You stick to your guns because you will ALWAYS know what is best for your child regardless because you're the MUM!
xx

This is so true!! Those same people who are telling you what you should do now will be doing the same when you LO is here too - you'll be getting the "My LO was walking, talking and such and such age, etc etc..." or advice to do all kinds of parenting things you might not want. It never ends!

I don't go into much detail about what I'm doing regarding labour/delivery. We're planning a homebirth this time around and only OH and I and the MW know about it - there's just no reason to get negative advice as MIL would go insane if she knew. I also BF my son for 18 months (almost 19!), had a natural birth and used cloth since birth - I plan the same for this one. It's all about what your choices are. I didn't get negativity from people, but I did get that superior "Oh you just wait until baby is here, then things will change about cloth and a natural birth" ... Best advice?

Every friend I have that has had children since my LO was born has bought cloth and one right now is going for an all-natural birth (due in a week!). They are all BF too, but it is pretty common practice to BF here. You will see that your experiences help open people's minds! xx

It annoys me to no end when people push their ideas on you! Different things work for different people - GAH!