hating myself right now :(

[mamacastro]

I'm almost nervous to write this for fear of being judged. I did something terrible today which I absolutely regret.
I am on klonopin for anxiety, and my psych told me to come off of it when I told him I was pregnant 1 month ago. I spoke to my OB,and she was completely fine with me staying on it, so I did.
Today I had a follow up with the psych, and was scared he would not prescribe my medication, so when he asked if I was off of it, the first thing that absent mindedly came out of my mouth was "unfortunately I miscarried".

I feel disgusting and like an idiot and feel like I "jinxed" my pregnancy. I prayed as soon as I left, and just don't know what to do.

I'm not sure if I'm looking for reassurance, or just needed an outlet to vent. Thank you for listening

 

[Eleanor ace]

. I'm sure we've all said or done things tat we instantly regretted, I know I have! Don't be too hard on yourself, you haven't harmed your LO with your words. Did you end up telling your therapist that you're still pregnant? If not I'd get that over and done with, I'm sure he will understand that you were just worried about not getting the medication.

 

[mamacastro]

. I'm sure we've all said or done things tat we instantly regretted, I know I have! Don't be too hard on yourself, you haven't harmed your LO with your words. Did you end up telling your therapist that you're still pregnant? If not I'd get that over and done with, I'm sure he will understand that you were just worried about not getting the medication.

I haven't yet. I was planning on finding one who is more accommodating to pregnant women and their needs. Thank you so much for your kind words. You don't know what that means to me!

 

[Tink_]

I agree about not being too hard on yourself. I am also on klonopin and stopped taking it when I found out I was pregnant which left me very anxious and thankfully was told by my GP I could take it sparingly if needed which gave me relief!

I think it's very scary suddenly being told you can't have medication that you know you need in order to get through anxiety and it's understandable that at that point something just popped in to your head.

I agree with you about finding a more supportive therapist. It would be good for you to find somebody who can weigh up the pro's and con's of medication for both you and your baby.

x

 

[wonders10]

First of all, I completely understand your need for the meds. My boyfriend takes the same and it's helped him a lot.

That being said, I made a off color joke to my doctor about my boyfriend offering me one of his klons because I was so anxious about my pregnancy sometimes. She looked horrified and even though she knew I was joking, said absolutely do not take it.

I don't know if it's a different situation if you have been taking it awhile, but maybe double check that it's safe?

 

[mamacastro]

First of all, I completely understand your need for the meds. My boyfriend takes the same and it's helped him a lot.

That being said, I made a off color joke to my doctor about my boyfriend offering me one of his klons because I was so anxious about my pregnancy sometimes. She looked horrified and even though she knew I was joking, said absolutely do not take it.

I don't know if it's a different situation if you have been taking it awhile, but maybe double check that it's safe?

My OB said there isn't enough evidence to prove that it is unsafe in the first or second trimester. She has had many patients use this med during pregnancy. Also, I'm on a super super low dose! She feels I would benefit more by being on it, than off of it! I was nervous that it was not safe, but double triple checked and will be seeing a high risk just to be monitored!