Having a down night...

[aidensxmomma]

Sometimes I feel like maybe I shouldn't have another baby. I'm really worried about having another one. I am definitely worried about how long it's going to take. It took me about 13 months to get pregnant with my youngest. And my cycles are really long and irregular (on cycle day 71 right now). It's going to be heartbreaking if it takes that long (or longer) again.

Also, I know that I'm going to be an absolute nervous wreck when I get pregnant and even more when I have a newborn. I lost my youngest daughter suddenly to SIDS when she was 3 1/2 months old. It's been almost two years since then. I've been spending a lot of time with my best friend and her 5 month old daughter. I can't sleep when I'm around the baby if there's not someone else awake. I'm not sure how I'm going to handle it when I have my own.

I really do want another baby (or two or three ) but I think now that I have a TTC date and am not waiting indefinitely anymore, it seems more real and I'm starting to get cold feet. Is this normal?

 

[Eline]

I'm understand that you are very worried. It might help to talk about this with your gp. I had a niece with an elevated SIDS risk and she was given home a heartrate monitor from the hospital that registered her heartbeat when she was sleeping and had an alarm to go off when anything would be wrong. It was a very small monitor she could take wherever she went. There are also some monitors you can buy online I've found, but I don't know how effective they are.

 

[aidensxmomma]

I didn't even know they made those. I will definitely talk to my doctor about getting one when the time comes. I bet it would be a massive help to me. Thank you.

 

[callmedan]

aww im so sorry for what you have been through
try not to worry, you have been blessed with 3 beautiful children already and i know you must be so nervous after what happened with your little girl but dont let it put you off! you are obviously a great mum and you have 9 months to gear yourself up, maybe take up something like yoga to keep you calm?
good luck xx