I'm not technically due to join in in the baby group for a couple more weeks, small one is due to join us in another 3 weeks but I've just had the health visitor round for a 'pre baby' visit and was wondering if this was the norm now (I'm sure the health visitor never came out before I had my first son who is 5 1/2). I found her to be quite patronising, we've lived here for 4 years now and have had no contact from her for our son. We registered with the doctors when we moved in and he's been at nursery from 2 1/2 and is now at school. But she started going on about his 'development' and how he wouldn't have had any 'assesments' and basically acting as if it was a major problem. I'm not breast feeding (please don't shoot me down, I've given it alot of thought and I know I wouldn't feel comfortable, wouldn't want people round, wouldn't go out and would probably resent my baby for it. All in all I feel that a bottle fed baby with a happy mom is better off than a breast fed baby with an unhappy mother). But as soon as I mentioned that, her tone changed and I feel she spoke down to me. She also began to lecture me about having an elective section (I have severe SPD, a bad hernia and had an emergancy c section with my son plus the hospital I have to go to is almost 2 hours drive away) the consultant is fine with my choice and my reasons for it but she started going on about how 'rewarding' having a 'natural' birth is. Does anyone know if they have a legal obligation to see/weigh/assess my baby or can I refuse let them come and not go to the clinics? I'm thinking wait until I get out of hospital and then write a letter to them saying that I feel she spoke down to me and that I don't feel that there is any need for her to 'assess' my child, assure them that if I feel there is any problems that I will seek medical assistance from a doctor and then be free to bring my child up without her judging me. Or would this possibly flag up up as a 'problem' or a 'concern'? Sorry for the rant but it really got to me that she walked into my house, spoke to me as if I had been hiding my son from her and questioned his development and my parenting of him (he's at a tiny but really good school if there was a problem with my parenting they would have spotted it), then dispite the fact that I could justify my decisions to her about feeding and c-section she proceded to go on about how wrong I was and how I need to give it more thought - hello I've thought of nothing else for the last year.