History repeating itself.

Discussion in 'Miscarriage Support' started by tamithomas, May 29, 2013.

  1. tamithomas

    tamithomas Well-Known Member

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    Gah, I hate times like these. I'm having serious anxiety issues today (more like paranoia) because it feels like history is repeating itself. A couple that we know that gave birth two weeks after our m/c last August wants to meet up with us at the coffee shop Friday evening. They only want to meet up when they need something or have news to share. Woman's intuition is telling me they're pregnant again.

    I know I'm running on a bunch of if's but: what if I do get bfp again and yet again m/c right before they give birth? What if I watch them go 2 under 2 and still no baby on my end? What if they m/c and they ask us to be there for them after the blatant cold shoulder attitude they gave us during ours? (They called to ask if we'd go to the hospital to meet the LO, told them the news and all we got was "that sucks..so are you still coming?" like as if we told them I stubbed my toe, after that it's like it never happened and got the baby shoved in our faces something awful)

    I know it's a lot of maybes but my mind is running in circles. I don't know if I'd be able to be around for this pregnancy but at the same time I can't help but feel guilty because it's not their fault we're having issues conceiving. This is going to be a toughy. I hope for once my gutt feeling is fooling me but it rarely ever does.

    Luckily DH and I already have a plan that if a bfp announcement does come up, we have the "we can't stay too long because we have something in the oven, the literal one"

    Thanks for letting me rant.
     
  2. ClaudiasMummy

    ClaudiasMummy Well-Known Member

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    I am sorry for your losses. I know this sounds silly but we can't live on 'what ifs'. You have to live for the moment and embrace life. I know it's hard after loss. But you never know - you could have a bfp and not mc. I hope these people one day learn it's not nice rubbing people's faces in things.
    If you don't want to go, don't.
     
  3. tamithomas

    tamithomas Well-Known Member

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    True. We're going anyways just in case I'm wrong, it'd be wrong of us to cancel on a possibility. After being able to vent on here with that post yesterday I feel much better today. Hopefully they just want my DH to cook for them again or something lol just nervous on the fact that they put emphasis on just wanting to chat. I live in one of those towns where people don't contact you unless there's something in it for them. Gotta love small towns haha. Up and onwards :)
     
  4. Topanga053

    Topanga053 Well-Known Member

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    So glad you're feeling better today! The "what ifs" are AWFUL!!! I kill myself with those all of the time! It drives my therapist crazy. He told me that his grandmother used to say (in response to what ifs like that) "what if I was a duck and went 'quack quack'?"

    That ALWAYS makes me laugh when I'm having a "what if" day and reminds me how completely useless those what ifs are!
     
  5. tamithomas

    tamithomas Well-Known Member

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    Oh my goodness I'm blue in the face from laughter from that :haha::haha::haha::haha::haha::haha: Thanks for the good laugh. Joking aside it's definitely a saying I will be adding to my back pocket to shake myself out of these mental battles with myself. Thank you!
     
  6. Topanga053

    Topanga053 Well-Known Member

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    I'm so glad! I don't know why, but it always makes me feel better!! Probably because it always makes me laugh! :haha:
     

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