Home vs Hospital Birth

[BrandiCanucks]

I've had two hospital births. One was a very negative experience, to the point that the nurses went behind my back and told my daughter's father that I was starving my daughter (at a day old) and she "NEEDED formula". Rather than help a first time mom with breastfeeding, they pushed the formula. My second experience wasn't as bad. My son was born perfectly healthy, apgars 9 and 9 and was a breastfeeding pro. But he stopped breathing 3 hours after birth and landed in the NICU for a week. It turned out, he swallowed the mucus plug on his way out.

I have taken many different routes and experiences with this pregnancy, as it is my last. My daughter was conceived via artificial insemination with donor sperm, and I'm seeing a midwife rather than an OB.

Initially, given my son's birth experience, I wanted another hospital birth, but my midwife keeps reassuring me that the likelihood of his experience happening again in very slim. She also says if it happens again, I am only a few minutes from the hospital and she would be in the pediatric ward where I could stay with her all I wanted, unlike the NICU.

So, now I'm considering a home birth. Has anyone here experienced both? Which was the better experience and why? Do I have anything I should be concerned about if I go for a home birth?

 

[NaturalMomma]

I have had both.

ds1 was born in the hospital. Things were great when it was DH and I at home laboring. I labored for 15 hours before I went into the hospital. Things started to go wrong as soon as I walked in the doors. I was progressing just fine as told by my Doctor, but he still broke my waters and put me on Pitocin so I could "be done by this afternoon". That made things worse for me as I told him numerous times that I don't do well with medications. So the nurse gave me Nubain, made it way worse, she gave me the Epidural which has caused me to have back pain still 3.5 years later. I was very disconnected from the expierence, had PPD, a 2nd degree tear which formed a egg size blood clot, a baby who wasn't breathing and a baby who was so sleepy he wouldn't breastfeed. DH and I both felt that that birth was bad and could have gone very differently. We both feel very disrespected and Dh told me he didn't want anymore kids in the hospital, which is totally fine by me because I feel the same.

ds2 was born at home. I got up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, I stood up and realized my water had broke. I put a pad on and went back to bed for a few hours when I couldn't lay anymore. Got the birth kit out and my pool blown up and started to fill it. Those who were attending the birth came a few hours later. My oldest son played for awhile and then went with MIL to the hotel to swim. DH and I did a lot of walking around town. Most of my labor was spent alone with him. Finally I hit transition, spent the time doing squats, being on the birth ball and in the birth pool. My son was ultimatily born in the living room with me standing and squating. The MW caught him but only had him for less than a second when she handed him to me. My DH had kept pressure on my perineum to help with tearing, which I didn't. I was breastfeeding within less than 20 minutes and it was amazing.

For my first son's birth my first picutre of him is him in a warmer with an oxygen mask, naked and crying alone. It saddens me everytime I see it. My second son's first picture is so beautiful. My DH is sitting behind me, I am sitting on the birth stool with my son in my arms and you can tell I have a rush of oxytocin. I am smiling and happy, not in any pain at all.

 

[TattiesMum]

I've had both as well

My eldest daughter was a hospital birth ... as with NaturalMomma I was labouring well at home - in control, comfortable and relaxed. As soon as I got to the hospital I felt immediately out of control and scared - the midwives hardly spoke to me at all, connected me to monitors despite my birth plan specifying that I wanted to move around, tried to break my waters with a monitoring head clip and THEN wanted to put said clip in baby's head.

When I refused they just left me only to re-appear when I buzzed for them when I went into 2nd stage and tell me that I couldn't possibly be that far along because I'd only been there for 3 hours and was 5cms on admittance .... They had to eat their words when she started crowning and then rushed around in a panic which panicked me too. At no time did I feel like she was mine until I got her home - it felt like the hospital owned her

I couldn't get out of the hospital quickly enough afterwards - I was only in for 12 hours but it seemed like a lifetime and I swore I was never ever going back there.

My 2nd daughter was a planned home birth ... just over 3 hours from start to finish which I put down to being totally relaxed, being able to keep moving and feeling calm and positive about the whole experience. The midwives arrived soon after I called them and were with me the whole time, but supporting rather than controlling me

I laboured all over the house LOL and eventually had her on my bed (my choice), delivered onto my tummy, and in an atmosphere of calm happiness - then we broke open a bottle of bubbly which we shared with the midwives, who were happy to stay and chat like friends rather than health professionals. A shower in my own bathroom, a nap in my own bed, a takeaway for dinner and being able to sleep in my own house with my little family were worth more than words can say - perfect

What's really scary is that my eldest daughter is now 21 so you would hope that things had changed over the years - yet this year my 2nd daughter went into the same maternity unit to have her son and I was her birthing partner. Absolutely nothing had changed - like me she laboured quickly and the reactions of the midwives and the way we were treated was almost exactly the same as it was 21 years ago

 

[Mervs Mum]

I've had 1 hospital, 1 birth centre and 1 home and while I LOVED both my second and third births, by far my home birth was my favourite. I'm a passionate believer that the best place for a woman to birth is where SHE feels most comfortable - be that hospital or home - but if I were to have any more there would be no question where they would be born. Home all the way

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