Bournefree
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- May 14, 2009
- Messages
- 1,420
- Reaction score
- 0
Bronwyn's Birthday Diary!
It's mammoth - sorry!.. But a true account of everything that happened!!!
This is our first child, and we got the birth (more or less) we planned for - happy days!
25th Nov 2009, 9:56am
Had a bit of a restless night, after having a sweep 9pm, at the birth centre, I was stretched to 2cm!! The reason for the sweep was, to get me into labour, as I’m 4 days over, and I don’t want to go too much over, or I would have to choose to be induced - and that is totally want I don’t want - needs must! I was a jolly strange and uncomfortable experience. My MW Jill, even commented, it was quietest she has ever seen me!! but I'm up and about having a nice cup of tea at the moment, and I have got lots of intermittent contractions. I'm on my own at the mo; just waiting for my mum to come round, so I can get in and out of the bath, safely. I sent my other half to work... he didn't want to go but I figured it could be ages (It's possible that I could stay at 2cm for a few days), and if it isn't.. he can be here quickly. My waters haven't broken, but I've deff started to loose my plug!!
Plus the other thing that is different this morning, is that I have very rosy cheeks!! How strange, I look like aunt sally!! hahaha!!! Anyone else experienced that?
Nov 25th, 2009, 4:03 PM
Well had a couple of stronger contractions today, and just now, a whole load more gunky bloody stuff has just fallen away from me. I think things are on the move more, and more! I'm very excited, and feeling good. Can't sit still though!
Nov 25th, 2009, 4.30pm
I'm pretty sure, as things are at the moment, we are in the beginnings of labour.. It is wonderful feeling. Just now, I have had one big show, lots of mucus, and blood have just come away. Tummy is rock hard, intense but not at all painful. I'm full of beans -can't sit still... and have to admit to having a glass of wine to celebrate!! I'm currently leaning over the dinning room table, while looking at the laptop.. keeping myself distracted - jigging about in my pants only - it just felt right.
I'm waiting for hubby to come home, haven't told him anything of what has been happening today.. as I don't want him driving like a nutter down the m-way to get to me, when realistically it could be ages yet!!!
Still I'm going to get him to blow-up the pool when he gets home. Although, full of beans, I'm calm - I think I've surprised myself - I always wanted to be, but sometimes you never really know how you're going to react! I have the radio on bbc 2, and have been dancing about a bit!! Ok, so maybe not calm, but happy and excited!!!
Nov 26th, 20009, 1.15 AM
Called Midwife, out to check. 1 Midwife arrived from the unit at the hospital and came with a student. I don‘t remember either of their names, and I‘m really sorry. But i have to say, that having a student there was actually great, as the MW had to explain every clinical decision, and how to write my notes, and what everything meant.
As I thought my waters had gone, (I felt what I thought was some trickling) I’ve been wearing a pad to stop any mess from the plug - it’s so hard when you don’t know what is a show, the plug, or your waters - and you are hyper-sensitive! The mw, really wanted to see the pad and I showed her, and I agreed to internal exam. They were cautious, as they didn’t want to be examining me internally if my waters had gone, due to infection. I was checked with a speculum, so they could see, without touching me. They weren’t broken, and then they checked by hand and I was still 2cm. Ahhh!! After that, I was having contractions ranging from every 3-5 mins but only lasting about 10 secs. MW’s said it was latent labour, rather than established 1st stage labour, so they advised to wait until there were 3-4 contractions in a 10 minute period, lasting for at least a minute each. Also to try and get some sleep so I managed to get a couple of hours. It so weird when you don’t really know what is going on with your body!! They were strange and only slightly uncomfortable, but not in the least painful.
Nov 26th, 20009, 6 AM
Woke up after a fitful couple of hours and had contractions for a number of hours, with Gareth my OH timing them. We watched movies, and blew-up the birth pool - sterilised it with some Milton, but haven’t filled it.
Nov 26th, 2009, 2 PM
We finally decided in the afternoon to call the midwife again, really just for advice and maybe to examine me to see what stage we were at. So I was hopeful that things were moving along, but had no idea how far or fast, I really wanted some feed-back.
Midwife Chris arrived at the flat. I was still having some fairly intense contractions, 3-4 in every 10 mins but still ranging in length from 20 secs to 1min. My OH had been timing my contractions for hours and writing them all down on a notepad (this was good to look at after, and easy to show the MW when they asked about my contractions - plus it gave Garth something to take control over).
I was examined by Chris the MW, and was found to be 3-4 cm dilated. Woohoo, something IS happening now!! Chris said I was well on the way, but still in very early onset labour.
She wanted to feel my tummy during a contraction, and I laid back on the sofa - then I quickly exclaimed, “oh my god, I think my waters have really gone now, it feels all warm and wet!“
She quickly lifted my nighty, and put her hand between my legs…. And pulled out the hot water bottle!!!!!! My contractions and discomfort soon disappeared into howls of laughter!!!!
I was advised to have a hot bath so I could rest a bit, and see where we were in a few hours. She was a wonderfully gentle natured lady, and very comforting - she rubbed my back for me, even cuddled me; and when I was standing through a contraction, she took hold of my hips from behind, and we did a kind of salsa!!! That felt great - even though, it must have looked quite bizarre!!!
She also reminded me to have something to eat - with all that was going on , and the excitement.. I hadn’t eaten anything since the night before. I really didn’t realise I was famished. She said anything calcium rich is good for helping your muscles; So between contractions, I busied myself making a cheese sandwich. My mum was round at this point, and she really wanted to make it for me, but I refused, saying that it was a brilliant distraction, even though it took a good 15mins to make the thing!! And a about an hour to eat it!!
I was using my TENS machine, and I made a comment to the MW, saying “I don’t think it is helping, it seams to be only making it worse!!” She quickly pointed out that they were going to get stronger, with, or without the TENS, as I was in labour!!… which gave us all a chuckle... but I was doing really well, so it must be having an effect.
Chris the MW told us she was on-call till 8 PM and she was more than happy to stay with me if I wanted. It was a really sweet offer (I never imagined a mw saying they could stay with me for 6 hours!!!) but I decided I was happy and ok, so would have a bath and call her if necessary. I also sent my mum home, so Gareth and I could be alone and peaceful for a few hours.
Nov26th, 2009, 3.30 PM
Had a nice bath and the contractions let off slightly. Also managed to get some sleep for about 20mins in the bath, under Gareth’s watchful eye. When I got out, the contractions started up again. This time a more intense than before. I felt my waters break with a pop type click feeling, at around 16.45 PM and found also a bit of blood had leaked. I was wearing a my knickers still, and a pad.. And to my surprise, all of my waters were absorbed by the pad. Gareth rang the midwife with out me knowing (must be all those movies!).
They wanted to speak to me on the phone to judge how I was doing. It was a long conversation, where I didn’t say too much, as although not painful, I couldn’t really speak very well during a contraction - and was doing some pretty heavy breathing down the phone. Any other time, I was thinking, I could be arrested for this!!! The MW co-ordinator asked if we wanted Chris the MW to come back, but I thought I could wait while.
I Immediately began to feel sick after I was off the phone and vomited into a bucket in one big rush. Gareth flushed it and I could hear him retching in the bathroom! (he hates sick , even his own- I thought, he was an absolute star!!)
When he arrived back in the room, he rang the midwife and got Chris back out; This was because a had a bit of a panic attack: I began to question whether I would be able to cope. It was a totally visceral flight/fight response. I told him I wanted to go in and have an epidural, (not because of the pain, I wasn't in any - I just didn't want to be involved in any of it!!).. and even said “I'm not joking” in the most serious voice I could muster. But he stayed very calm and composed, got my breathing under control, and reminded me I would really regret that decision, and to not make any rash judgements until Chris the MW had arrived and assessed the situation. (a little thought of mine went out, thinking bloody hell, he really DID listen to me!!!)
I knew he was right - and I had even warned him to hold fast for me; as during our anti-natal classes the MW’s had talked about this transition stage response… That total need for escape is very real and powerful, if only for a short while. (3mins at the most). These were the sort of feelings that other women have experienced before labour proper begins, and is a good sign. After the very brief interlude, Gareth filled the pool. All the while, I telling him how to do it, and interfering!!! It made me feel better!! Hahaha!
Nov 26th, 2009, 5 PM
Midwife Chris arrived back, and agreed that my waters had gone and that I was just about ready to get in the pool. I told her I had been sick and I nearly got in the car to the hospital!!! To which we all laughed!! (she was so in tune with what I wanted) I also said to her I felt bad that I had lost most of my cheese sandwich!! She said “that’s a really good sign, you have just had a flood of hormones, because your waters have gone and your body is readying itself".
She went to get the rest of her kit from the car, and I just couldn’t wait to get into the pool, so stripped off totally starkers in the living room and almost jumped into the pool.
After being sick etc, that flood of hormones feeling left me - I felt totally different.. It’s hard to explain, but I was more IN myself, as my body took over - I didn’t have to think about anything, or make any conscious decisions or have any really conscious thoughts (I can remember having about 3 conscious thoughts, right up until she was born), I was happy.
Gareth put some music on which I didn’t even notice; and I had spent months choosing my babies birthday play list!!! (I was told the music was on, much later after the baby was born, and what went on from here, is more Gareth‘s recollection on what happened step by step, and my recollection of what and how I felt)
All through, Chris the MW held my hand and rubbed my back. I was given the gas and air - she assured me she had a total of 6 canisters in her car (they were smaller, 40cm ones, diddy, and very portable), and not to worry about using too much; she wasn’t going to run out. It was assuring, even though I didn’t feel I needed it, she assuring me every step of the way.
I was breathing on it fairly regularly but very gently (at first, I was hesitant to use it, as I thought, I don’t want to be “out of it“, as I wasn’t in any pain, but It was good to control my breathing, and more as a distraction than anything else). I was using it before I felt a contraction coming on and breathing it out during a contraction. I was totally calm, and felt peaceful. My position at this point was on all-fours leaning over the edge of the pool. The water came all the way up to my back, and felt so good to swish side to side and wiggle my hips - one point during a brief brake in contractions, I let my legs float out behind me - and that felt amazing to stretch - I didn’t remember this, but Gareth told me; Chris the MW said “blimey, this birth pool has loads of room~!“
The water was topped up with more hot from the hose connected to the kitchen sink, and Chris the MW used the hose during this point to place it on my back - which felt soooo nice!
Nov 26th, 2009, 6.30 PM
My midwife Jill (who I had seen for all of my anti-natal visits, and who had supported my home birth plans throughout) arrived to assist Chris. Jill was an immediate help, with great words of encouragement. (she knew me well) During this time she told me to push down with each contraction. But they were not involuntary pushes at this time, so I was not quite yet in 2nd stage labour.
Nov 26th, 2009, 7.15 PM
Involuntary pushing began, as I hit 2nd stage labour. My body totally took over - I find it hard to say where I was, but, I was in a totally different place. I was still using the gas and air, and had to have a bottle change. Further on, in every contraction, I was using up quite a lot of energy letting out some very primal, animalistic moans on breathing out, which I didn’t realise I was capable of!!!>>??? - this was one of my totally conscious thoughts “ What on earth is that noise.?? Oh it’s me! How strange is that?” - I almost chucked to myself! There were 2 voices that I heard talking to me during labour, one was Gareth my OH, and the other was my MW Jill (Chris was still there, but as I was Jill’s patient, she took the lead) I was wonderful to hear her voice, even though, I not even sure if I opened my eyes much until the baby was here!
Gareth was supporting me in more ways than one; he was giving me drinks of squash, (I was so thirsty throughout - even to the point, when the mw‘s said, “if you need to wee, do it in the pool, it’s all sterile”, (I didn‘t once feel the need to wee, but I must have done a few in there!!). He was also spraying my face and back with cold water and rubbing my lower back during the contractions. During this time, and right up until the baby was born, I was leaning out over the edge of the pool, and had a firm grip all around this thigh, with both arms. While he leaned over and stroked my back.
I found him really helpful and comforting when having a contraction. When he left me to get some more squash for me, and to go to the loo; each time, I really, really wanted him back. To feel his warmth, and encouragement felt like a life-blood at the time!
I was on all fours, kneeling on my left leg, and with my right foot planted on the floor of the pool with my leg bent. It was the most comfortable position for me, but it made it very difficult for the midwives to see what was happening. One of the midwives got a head torch from their car. Gareth and I hadn‘t had the time or the whereabouts to think about turning on the lights since it had gone past dusk. (the room was dimly lit to say the least, talk about mood-lighting!)
They asked a couple of times if I could try a push whilst facing forward sitting on my bum in the water, which I tried to do, but found the position to really uncomfortable, so that was soon dismissed, and I was assured to adopt any position comfortable. They were really apologetic about asking me to move! I reverted to the position I was in before and stayed like that till she was born.
Jill also advised me to concentrate all my energies into pushing downwards into my bottom, and not to expel too much energy with noises (not that I was really loud - I’m assured by Gareth).. and to concentrate on my breathing - as for one, I would end up with a sore voice!! I found this to be great advice - it made a big difference to my labour. I didn’t realise it till I was later told, the noises I made after this advice were totally different; I was breathing through it. It became obvious to Gareth that I had taken the advice on board, and labour was easier for me.
During this time, a third midwife, Katy arrived, as Chris and Jill were due to finish their shifts at 2000 PM. I didn’t even notice her presence. I now had 3 midwives, this must have been quite sight!! Jill managed to source a portable mirror from the bathroom, which she held under the water at the bottom of the pool, whilst Katy shone the torch on it. This way, they were able to see what was happening with the birth.. They told me they could see the head and she had fair hair!!!... and told me to feel between my legs; only about a 4cm diameter was touchable, putting my fingers only slightly inside me. I was overjoyed to know she was nearly here!!!
Nov 26th, 2009, 8 PM
Midwife No. 4 arrived, Angela; who would work with Katy when Chris and Jill were due to leave at the end of their shift at 8pm. However Chris and Jill decided to stay as they wanted to be here for the birth. And on their own time, I might add! They didn’t want to see me this far and not be with me and met my baby, as I was quite close!
Around this time, the baby’s head began to crown properly. I remember Jill telling me this bit could be “quite burney” but I didn’t feel that at all. She was very encouraging, telling me when to push and when to breathe. Gareth was also giving words of encouragement, and although the room was full (I had no idea there were at this time 4 midwives, and my OH) - Gareth’s and Jill’s were the only two voices I heard. I was not even aware that Katy and Angela had arrived! The contractions were coming faster now as the head was crowning, and Jill was very keen for me to actively push hard with each contraction, as she was wary that the head might go back in - which I felt it did a few times - it was a little out, and then each time, out and in a smaller amount. So she was asking me to give 3 good pushes each time there was a contraction. This I found difficult to do, as I was quite tired. I even remember thinking, when Jill the midwife said to me, “Come on now, this is it, the last one, and you have to keep it going - the babies head will be born after this!“ - It was one of my conscious thoughts, and I thought, “bollocks bet it is going to take 3 or 4 more contractions, and she’s is having me on!!!”
I did manage some almighty pushes that I kept going after that contraction, and was told that the head was completely free, then without warning or a pause, the baby slipped out and into the water to the bottom of the pool - nobody caught her - we all didn‘t think it was going to happen then!!
The next thing I knew, I was being told, “turn around and pick up your baby!
I turned around couldn’t really see because of the dark, and felt for her.. There she was!!! (it was seconds, I assure you!!, (not that she was in any danger, as she was still attached, and hadn‘t had the reflex to breath yet, being under water) - and I didn’t even know then it was a girl!!!
Nov 26th 2009, 8.32PM
I turned around and lifted the baby from the bottom of the pool, picked her up and sat down on my bottom in the water and cradled her up near my breasts. She looked at me, with one eye fully open, and the other half open (really soon afterwards the MW’s had turned on the lights. I was a little shocked, and all a wonder!! She started to breath with little bubbles at her lips! But no cries.
The cord was wrapped down her tummy, through her legs, and around the baby’s ankles but once it was unravelled, we discovered she was a girl! I held her in my arms for a quite a while. I kept wanting to lift her free of the water, stroke her, and look at her, but was reminded to try and keep her body submerged - for warmth!! She had her APGAR obs done with me holding her (I didn’t even know they were doing it - I was totally absorbed in her eyes). It was only then, that I looked up and noticed all the people around me - and said “oh hello, everybody!!, this is Bronwyn!!
4 midwives there for her birth; I was in fantastic hands. The next thing I said was… “I know why there is a lack of midwives!!?? Well there all round here!!!.. To which we all had a good laugh!!!
Gareth cried, we had a few photos taken, and after he ran off to make loads of phonecalls.
I wanted to stay in the pool, with the baby still attached to the cord to deliver the placenta naturally. However, after about half an hour, I got cramp in my legs so hard, I had to stand and get out. I tried to do this with her still attached and everything, but was offered to cut the cord.. So as Gareth was still making phone calls, he was quickly summoned and asked if he wanted to cut the cord, which he did. He described it like squid - which I think is pretty apt!! It was a fascinating structure, all the vessels, all coiled around each other - and had gone mostly white, as it had stopped pulsating.
The baby was then taken by Gareth wrapped in an old blue towel of ours, while I walked about a bit to ease the cramp, and then I was lead into the bathroom to try and deliver the placenta, as they suggested it might be comfortable to sit on the loo to do it.
They placed a plastic bag around the bowl to catch the placenta so they could examine it after, but it wasn’t really working for me; I was too excited.. Didn’t feel any further contractions.. and felt I was missing out on my baby, who was in the next room.
I said,” it’s not happening now, I want to fed her" - so we all trundled back into the living room, with the MW, holding control of my cord, which was about half a meter long!! Behind me!! I sat down the sofa, wrapped in towels, and with a large bed-wetting pad underneath me and fed her. Whilst I had be in the bathroom, she had been weighed, dressed, and wrapped up in a blanket - she looked so tiny.. But she knew what to do at the breast (more than mummy!). I was helped and encouraged by the MW’s who told me to remain calm, when I was saying “she doesn’t know where it is!?” She fed well, after a hesitant start, from me and her! Then I was reminded that I still had to deliver the placenta!! Woops! Right, so I gave her to Gareth, and by this point, although, I wanted everything to be as natural as possible, after an hour of trying to deliver it, I was getting frustrated!! So agreed to have the injection - they didn’t think that it would really work so well this long after, but I had it in the thigh anyways.
After waiting 30mins after the injection, I was laid on our bed, with one of my midwives, pulling every now and then on the cord, - it suddenly felt different. Where as before, I said, “no - it doesn’t feel right, stop pulling! “ (I have to say I didn’t like her doing that, and she only did it the once!) It suddenly came away, I wasn’t aware of any contractions - I have no idea if the injection did it, or it was just going to come anyway.
It was checked, and complete - I only had a brief glance at it, and I have to say now, I wished I had a more detailed look!; After all it supported my baby for 9 months, what a wonder!
I lost 150ml of blood… nothing significant or even noticeable. (I only had one baby bed wetting pad under my bum.. on our nice clean bedding!) After the delivery of the placenta, whist still laying on my bed, Bronwyn was bought into the bedroom and placed in the mosses basket beside me. The MW Katie, looked carefully at my vulva, I was bruised. I asked them to bring me a mirror, as I wanted to see for myself what needed to be done~! I was purple!! They were very obliging, explaining everything to me ( I’m one of these people, that want everything explained to them, to make me reassured.). The MW examined me, she had some concerns finding the apex of my wound. I had torn in my vagina, not my perineum. A type 2, 2nd degree tear. It was probably in the last all-wholly push, with her head and shoulders coming through at once. She basically couldn’t find the beginning. She was so lovely and apologetic. I said to her, I was happy to go in, if she wasn’t confident.. So she said, “no, you have come this far, lets not go in now!!” She said that she would call the most experienced MW in the area, and she would be able to do my stitches much better, as she wanted to give me the best!! The main problem was the light in the bedroom - damn those energy-saving light bulbs!!! - Gareth, ran out to the car, like a hero, and got his maglite!!! That was an experience!??! - Gareth proudly shining, and focusing, his high powered torch between my legs. Hahaha!!!
It took less than 10mins from calling the senior MW, to the time she arrived. Jacky was the lady, for the stitches!!! She was about 50 I'd say, and had an air of confidence. So then there were 5 midwives!!!! Soon after Jacky had arrived, Jill and Chris left, leaving me after lots of hugs and cuddles, with 3 MW‘s (the take over 2, and the senior mw to do the stitches). It was strange to be totally aware of all the contraptions they had brought; each cylinder had to be signed off, and also the medi-vac and portable incubator - in case of arrest. I had no idea, there was absolutely loads of it!!! They were so prepared for everything.
It does sound so silly, to say, but I was worried about the stitching - I was tender. As they touched me, I winced with pain. I even said "Gosh, what a wuss you think I must be!!!" They assured me that, my natural pain relief was gone, and it was normal. They gave me a novocaine injection into my bottom, vagina, and around my vulva (the injection was really painful, I even had gas and air for the injection being done!!! - if you read this and think what a plonker, I understand - but that was pain!!!! Child birth isn’t pain, it’s something entirely different! Anyway, after that - nothing, nothing at all was felt!!). I watched to amazement, via the mirror, as they stitched delicately between my legs.
So after the stitching, all but one of the MW’S had left, and most was cleared away, we all had cup of tea together, and the MW was happy, we were happy, so left.
We settled down to feed again and after all the excitement had died away at about 1am, we all went to sleep. Happy and healthy and totally in love with each other!!! (Gareth had never held me so tight!!)
Thank you for reading my family story!.. and a thanks for all the help and advice this site has offered me from, mummies, expectant mummies, and some men, all over the English speaking world!!!
A special thanks goes to all my wonderful MW's; their support, training, advice, and friendship - fantastic!!!! Thank you so much xxx
The pictures!!!
From the first 2 pictures, you can see it was almost totally dark! I'm sorry ladies (and some gents) for the odd boob and cord on show! …..and my inexplicable hair - but I blame that on being really hot, and the water spray I used - thank goodness for hair bands!!
It's mammoth - sorry!.. But a true account of everything that happened!!!
This is our first child, and we got the birth (more or less) we planned for - happy days!
25th Nov 2009, 9:56am
Had a bit of a restless night, after having a sweep 9pm, at the birth centre, I was stretched to 2cm!! The reason for the sweep was, to get me into labour, as I’m 4 days over, and I don’t want to go too much over, or I would have to choose to be induced - and that is totally want I don’t want - needs must! I was a jolly strange and uncomfortable experience. My MW Jill, even commented, it was quietest she has ever seen me!! but I'm up and about having a nice cup of tea at the moment, and I have got lots of intermittent contractions. I'm on my own at the mo; just waiting for my mum to come round, so I can get in and out of the bath, safely. I sent my other half to work... he didn't want to go but I figured it could be ages (It's possible that I could stay at 2cm for a few days), and if it isn't.. he can be here quickly. My waters haven't broken, but I've deff started to loose my plug!!
Plus the other thing that is different this morning, is that I have very rosy cheeks!! How strange, I look like aunt sally!! hahaha!!! Anyone else experienced that?
Nov 25th, 2009, 4:03 PM
Well had a couple of stronger contractions today, and just now, a whole load more gunky bloody stuff has just fallen away from me. I think things are on the move more, and more! I'm very excited, and feeling good. Can't sit still though!
Nov 25th, 2009, 4.30pm
I'm pretty sure, as things are at the moment, we are in the beginnings of labour.. It is wonderful feeling. Just now, I have had one big show, lots of mucus, and blood have just come away. Tummy is rock hard, intense but not at all painful. I'm full of beans -can't sit still... and have to admit to having a glass of wine to celebrate!! I'm currently leaning over the dinning room table, while looking at the laptop.. keeping myself distracted - jigging about in my pants only - it just felt right.
I'm waiting for hubby to come home, haven't told him anything of what has been happening today.. as I don't want him driving like a nutter down the m-way to get to me, when realistically it could be ages yet!!!
Still I'm going to get him to blow-up the pool when he gets home. Although, full of beans, I'm calm - I think I've surprised myself - I always wanted to be, but sometimes you never really know how you're going to react! I have the radio on bbc 2, and have been dancing about a bit!! Ok, so maybe not calm, but happy and excited!!!
Nov 26th, 20009, 1.15 AM
Called Midwife, out to check. 1 Midwife arrived from the unit at the hospital and came with a student. I don‘t remember either of their names, and I‘m really sorry. But i have to say, that having a student there was actually great, as the MW had to explain every clinical decision, and how to write my notes, and what everything meant.
As I thought my waters had gone, (I felt what I thought was some trickling) I’ve been wearing a pad to stop any mess from the plug - it’s so hard when you don’t know what is a show, the plug, or your waters - and you are hyper-sensitive! The mw, really wanted to see the pad and I showed her, and I agreed to internal exam. They were cautious, as they didn’t want to be examining me internally if my waters had gone, due to infection. I was checked with a speculum, so they could see, without touching me. They weren’t broken, and then they checked by hand and I was still 2cm. Ahhh!! After that, I was having contractions ranging from every 3-5 mins but only lasting about 10 secs. MW’s said it was latent labour, rather than established 1st stage labour, so they advised to wait until there were 3-4 contractions in a 10 minute period, lasting for at least a minute each. Also to try and get some sleep so I managed to get a couple of hours. It so weird when you don’t really know what is going on with your body!! They were strange and only slightly uncomfortable, but not in the least painful.
Nov 26th, 20009, 6 AM
Woke up after a fitful couple of hours and had contractions for a number of hours, with Gareth my OH timing them. We watched movies, and blew-up the birth pool - sterilised it with some Milton, but haven’t filled it.
Nov 26th, 2009, 2 PM
We finally decided in the afternoon to call the midwife again, really just for advice and maybe to examine me to see what stage we were at. So I was hopeful that things were moving along, but had no idea how far or fast, I really wanted some feed-back.
Midwife Chris arrived at the flat. I was still having some fairly intense contractions, 3-4 in every 10 mins but still ranging in length from 20 secs to 1min. My OH had been timing my contractions for hours and writing them all down on a notepad (this was good to look at after, and easy to show the MW when they asked about my contractions - plus it gave Garth something to take control over).
I was examined by Chris the MW, and was found to be 3-4 cm dilated. Woohoo, something IS happening now!! Chris said I was well on the way, but still in very early onset labour.
She wanted to feel my tummy during a contraction, and I laid back on the sofa - then I quickly exclaimed, “oh my god, I think my waters have really gone now, it feels all warm and wet!“
She quickly lifted my nighty, and put her hand between my legs…. And pulled out the hot water bottle!!!!!! My contractions and discomfort soon disappeared into howls of laughter!!!!
I was advised to have a hot bath so I could rest a bit, and see where we were in a few hours. She was a wonderfully gentle natured lady, and very comforting - she rubbed my back for me, even cuddled me; and when I was standing through a contraction, she took hold of my hips from behind, and we did a kind of salsa!!! That felt great - even though, it must have looked quite bizarre!!!
She also reminded me to have something to eat - with all that was going on , and the excitement.. I hadn’t eaten anything since the night before. I really didn’t realise I was famished. She said anything calcium rich is good for helping your muscles; So between contractions, I busied myself making a cheese sandwich. My mum was round at this point, and she really wanted to make it for me, but I refused, saying that it was a brilliant distraction, even though it took a good 15mins to make the thing!! And a about an hour to eat it!!
I was using my TENS machine, and I made a comment to the MW, saying “I don’t think it is helping, it seams to be only making it worse!!” She quickly pointed out that they were going to get stronger, with, or without the TENS, as I was in labour!!… which gave us all a chuckle... but I was doing really well, so it must be having an effect.
Chris the MW told us she was on-call till 8 PM and she was more than happy to stay with me if I wanted. It was a really sweet offer (I never imagined a mw saying they could stay with me for 6 hours!!!) but I decided I was happy and ok, so would have a bath and call her if necessary. I also sent my mum home, so Gareth and I could be alone and peaceful for a few hours.
Nov26th, 2009, 3.30 PM
Had a nice bath and the contractions let off slightly. Also managed to get some sleep for about 20mins in the bath, under Gareth’s watchful eye. When I got out, the contractions started up again. This time a more intense than before. I felt my waters break with a pop type click feeling, at around 16.45 PM and found also a bit of blood had leaked. I was wearing a my knickers still, and a pad.. And to my surprise, all of my waters were absorbed by the pad. Gareth rang the midwife with out me knowing (must be all those movies!).
They wanted to speak to me on the phone to judge how I was doing. It was a long conversation, where I didn’t say too much, as although not painful, I couldn’t really speak very well during a contraction - and was doing some pretty heavy breathing down the phone. Any other time, I was thinking, I could be arrested for this!!! The MW co-ordinator asked if we wanted Chris the MW to come back, but I thought I could wait while.
I Immediately began to feel sick after I was off the phone and vomited into a bucket in one big rush. Gareth flushed it and I could hear him retching in the bathroom! (he hates sick , even his own- I thought, he was an absolute star!!)
When he arrived back in the room, he rang the midwife and got Chris back out; This was because a had a bit of a panic attack: I began to question whether I would be able to cope. It was a totally visceral flight/fight response. I told him I wanted to go in and have an epidural, (not because of the pain, I wasn't in any - I just didn't want to be involved in any of it!!).. and even said “I'm not joking” in the most serious voice I could muster. But he stayed very calm and composed, got my breathing under control, and reminded me I would really regret that decision, and to not make any rash judgements until Chris the MW had arrived and assessed the situation. (a little thought of mine went out, thinking bloody hell, he really DID listen to me!!!)
I knew he was right - and I had even warned him to hold fast for me; as during our anti-natal classes the MW’s had talked about this transition stage response… That total need for escape is very real and powerful, if only for a short while. (3mins at the most). These were the sort of feelings that other women have experienced before labour proper begins, and is a good sign. After the very brief interlude, Gareth filled the pool. All the while, I telling him how to do it, and interfering!!! It made me feel better!! Hahaha!
Nov 26th, 2009, 5 PM
Midwife Chris arrived back, and agreed that my waters had gone and that I was just about ready to get in the pool. I told her I had been sick and I nearly got in the car to the hospital!!! To which we all laughed!! (she was so in tune with what I wanted) I also said to her I felt bad that I had lost most of my cheese sandwich!! She said “that’s a really good sign, you have just had a flood of hormones, because your waters have gone and your body is readying itself".
She went to get the rest of her kit from the car, and I just couldn’t wait to get into the pool, so stripped off totally starkers in the living room and almost jumped into the pool.
After being sick etc, that flood of hormones feeling left me - I felt totally different.. It’s hard to explain, but I was more IN myself, as my body took over - I didn’t have to think about anything, or make any conscious decisions or have any really conscious thoughts (I can remember having about 3 conscious thoughts, right up until she was born), I was happy.
Gareth put some music on which I didn’t even notice; and I had spent months choosing my babies birthday play list!!! (I was told the music was on, much later after the baby was born, and what went on from here, is more Gareth‘s recollection on what happened step by step, and my recollection of what and how I felt)
All through, Chris the MW held my hand and rubbed my back. I was given the gas and air - she assured me she had a total of 6 canisters in her car (they were smaller, 40cm ones, diddy, and very portable), and not to worry about using too much; she wasn’t going to run out. It was assuring, even though I didn’t feel I needed it, she assuring me every step of the way.
I was breathing on it fairly regularly but very gently (at first, I was hesitant to use it, as I thought, I don’t want to be “out of it“, as I wasn’t in any pain, but It was good to control my breathing, and more as a distraction than anything else). I was using it before I felt a contraction coming on and breathing it out during a contraction. I was totally calm, and felt peaceful. My position at this point was on all-fours leaning over the edge of the pool. The water came all the way up to my back, and felt so good to swish side to side and wiggle my hips - one point during a brief brake in contractions, I let my legs float out behind me - and that felt amazing to stretch - I didn’t remember this, but Gareth told me; Chris the MW said “blimey, this birth pool has loads of room~!“
The water was topped up with more hot from the hose connected to the kitchen sink, and Chris the MW used the hose during this point to place it on my back - which felt soooo nice!
Nov 26th, 2009, 6.30 PM
My midwife Jill (who I had seen for all of my anti-natal visits, and who had supported my home birth plans throughout) arrived to assist Chris. Jill was an immediate help, with great words of encouragement. (she knew me well) During this time she told me to push down with each contraction. But they were not involuntary pushes at this time, so I was not quite yet in 2nd stage labour.
Nov 26th, 2009, 7.15 PM
Involuntary pushing began, as I hit 2nd stage labour. My body totally took over - I find it hard to say where I was, but, I was in a totally different place. I was still using the gas and air, and had to have a bottle change. Further on, in every contraction, I was using up quite a lot of energy letting out some very primal, animalistic moans on breathing out, which I didn’t realise I was capable of!!!>>??? - this was one of my totally conscious thoughts “ What on earth is that noise.?? Oh it’s me! How strange is that?” - I almost chucked to myself! There were 2 voices that I heard talking to me during labour, one was Gareth my OH, and the other was my MW Jill (Chris was still there, but as I was Jill’s patient, she took the lead) I was wonderful to hear her voice, even though, I not even sure if I opened my eyes much until the baby was here!
Gareth was supporting me in more ways than one; he was giving me drinks of squash, (I was so thirsty throughout - even to the point, when the mw‘s said, “if you need to wee, do it in the pool, it’s all sterile”, (I didn‘t once feel the need to wee, but I must have done a few in there!!). He was also spraying my face and back with cold water and rubbing my lower back during the contractions. During this time, and right up until the baby was born, I was leaning out over the edge of the pool, and had a firm grip all around this thigh, with both arms. While he leaned over and stroked my back.
I found him really helpful and comforting when having a contraction. When he left me to get some more squash for me, and to go to the loo; each time, I really, really wanted him back. To feel his warmth, and encouragement felt like a life-blood at the time!
I was on all fours, kneeling on my left leg, and with my right foot planted on the floor of the pool with my leg bent. It was the most comfortable position for me, but it made it very difficult for the midwives to see what was happening. One of the midwives got a head torch from their car. Gareth and I hadn‘t had the time or the whereabouts to think about turning on the lights since it had gone past dusk. (the room was dimly lit to say the least, talk about mood-lighting!)
They asked a couple of times if I could try a push whilst facing forward sitting on my bum in the water, which I tried to do, but found the position to really uncomfortable, so that was soon dismissed, and I was assured to adopt any position comfortable. They were really apologetic about asking me to move! I reverted to the position I was in before and stayed like that till she was born.
Jill also advised me to concentrate all my energies into pushing downwards into my bottom, and not to expel too much energy with noises (not that I was really loud - I’m assured by Gareth).. and to concentrate on my breathing - as for one, I would end up with a sore voice!! I found this to be great advice - it made a big difference to my labour. I didn’t realise it till I was later told, the noises I made after this advice were totally different; I was breathing through it. It became obvious to Gareth that I had taken the advice on board, and labour was easier for me.
During this time, a third midwife, Katy arrived, as Chris and Jill were due to finish their shifts at 2000 PM. I didn’t even notice her presence. I now had 3 midwives, this must have been quite sight!! Jill managed to source a portable mirror from the bathroom, which she held under the water at the bottom of the pool, whilst Katy shone the torch on it. This way, they were able to see what was happening with the birth.. They told me they could see the head and she had fair hair!!!... and told me to feel between my legs; only about a 4cm diameter was touchable, putting my fingers only slightly inside me. I was overjoyed to know she was nearly here!!!
Nov 26th, 2009, 8 PM
Midwife No. 4 arrived, Angela; who would work with Katy when Chris and Jill were due to leave at the end of their shift at 8pm. However Chris and Jill decided to stay as they wanted to be here for the birth. And on their own time, I might add! They didn’t want to see me this far and not be with me and met my baby, as I was quite close!
Around this time, the baby’s head began to crown properly. I remember Jill telling me this bit could be “quite burney” but I didn’t feel that at all. She was very encouraging, telling me when to push and when to breathe. Gareth was also giving words of encouragement, and although the room was full (I had no idea there were at this time 4 midwives, and my OH) - Gareth’s and Jill’s were the only two voices I heard. I was not even aware that Katy and Angela had arrived! The contractions were coming faster now as the head was crowning, and Jill was very keen for me to actively push hard with each contraction, as she was wary that the head might go back in - which I felt it did a few times - it was a little out, and then each time, out and in a smaller amount. So she was asking me to give 3 good pushes each time there was a contraction. This I found difficult to do, as I was quite tired. I even remember thinking, when Jill the midwife said to me, “Come on now, this is it, the last one, and you have to keep it going - the babies head will be born after this!“ - It was one of my conscious thoughts, and I thought, “bollocks bet it is going to take 3 or 4 more contractions, and she’s is having me on!!!”
I did manage some almighty pushes that I kept going after that contraction, and was told that the head was completely free, then without warning or a pause, the baby slipped out and into the water to the bottom of the pool - nobody caught her - we all didn‘t think it was going to happen then!!
The next thing I knew, I was being told, “turn around and pick up your baby!
I turned around couldn’t really see because of the dark, and felt for her.. There she was!!! (it was seconds, I assure you!!, (not that she was in any danger, as she was still attached, and hadn‘t had the reflex to breath yet, being under water) - and I didn’t even know then it was a girl!!!
Nov 26th 2009, 8.32PM
I turned around and lifted the baby from the bottom of the pool, picked her up and sat down on my bottom in the water and cradled her up near my breasts. She looked at me, with one eye fully open, and the other half open (really soon afterwards the MW’s had turned on the lights. I was a little shocked, and all a wonder!! She started to breath with little bubbles at her lips! But no cries.
The cord was wrapped down her tummy, through her legs, and around the baby’s ankles but once it was unravelled, we discovered she was a girl! I held her in my arms for a quite a while. I kept wanting to lift her free of the water, stroke her, and look at her, but was reminded to try and keep her body submerged - for warmth!! She had her APGAR obs done with me holding her (I didn’t even know they were doing it - I was totally absorbed in her eyes). It was only then, that I looked up and noticed all the people around me - and said “oh hello, everybody!!, this is Bronwyn!!
4 midwives there for her birth; I was in fantastic hands. The next thing I said was… “I know why there is a lack of midwives!!?? Well there all round here!!!.. To which we all had a good laugh!!!
Gareth cried, we had a few photos taken, and after he ran off to make loads of phonecalls.
I wanted to stay in the pool, with the baby still attached to the cord to deliver the placenta naturally. However, after about half an hour, I got cramp in my legs so hard, I had to stand and get out. I tried to do this with her still attached and everything, but was offered to cut the cord.. So as Gareth was still making phone calls, he was quickly summoned and asked if he wanted to cut the cord, which he did. He described it like squid - which I think is pretty apt!! It was a fascinating structure, all the vessels, all coiled around each other - and had gone mostly white, as it had stopped pulsating.
The baby was then taken by Gareth wrapped in an old blue towel of ours, while I walked about a bit to ease the cramp, and then I was lead into the bathroom to try and deliver the placenta, as they suggested it might be comfortable to sit on the loo to do it.
They placed a plastic bag around the bowl to catch the placenta so they could examine it after, but it wasn’t really working for me; I was too excited.. Didn’t feel any further contractions.. and felt I was missing out on my baby, who was in the next room.
I said,” it’s not happening now, I want to fed her" - so we all trundled back into the living room, with the MW, holding control of my cord, which was about half a meter long!! Behind me!! I sat down the sofa, wrapped in towels, and with a large bed-wetting pad underneath me and fed her. Whilst I had be in the bathroom, she had been weighed, dressed, and wrapped up in a blanket - she looked so tiny.. But she knew what to do at the breast (more than mummy!). I was helped and encouraged by the MW’s who told me to remain calm, when I was saying “she doesn’t know where it is!?” She fed well, after a hesitant start, from me and her! Then I was reminded that I still had to deliver the placenta!! Woops! Right, so I gave her to Gareth, and by this point, although, I wanted everything to be as natural as possible, after an hour of trying to deliver it, I was getting frustrated!! So agreed to have the injection - they didn’t think that it would really work so well this long after, but I had it in the thigh anyways.
After waiting 30mins after the injection, I was laid on our bed, with one of my midwives, pulling every now and then on the cord, - it suddenly felt different. Where as before, I said, “no - it doesn’t feel right, stop pulling! “ (I have to say I didn’t like her doing that, and she only did it the once!) It suddenly came away, I wasn’t aware of any contractions - I have no idea if the injection did it, or it was just going to come anyway.
It was checked, and complete - I only had a brief glance at it, and I have to say now, I wished I had a more detailed look!; After all it supported my baby for 9 months, what a wonder!
I lost 150ml of blood… nothing significant or even noticeable. (I only had one baby bed wetting pad under my bum.. on our nice clean bedding!) After the delivery of the placenta, whist still laying on my bed, Bronwyn was bought into the bedroom and placed in the mosses basket beside me. The MW Katie, looked carefully at my vulva, I was bruised. I asked them to bring me a mirror, as I wanted to see for myself what needed to be done~! I was purple!! They were very obliging, explaining everything to me ( I’m one of these people, that want everything explained to them, to make me reassured.). The MW examined me, she had some concerns finding the apex of my wound. I had torn in my vagina, not my perineum. A type 2, 2nd degree tear. It was probably in the last all-wholly push, with her head and shoulders coming through at once. She basically couldn’t find the beginning. She was so lovely and apologetic. I said to her, I was happy to go in, if she wasn’t confident.. So she said, “no, you have come this far, lets not go in now!!” She said that she would call the most experienced MW in the area, and she would be able to do my stitches much better, as she wanted to give me the best!! The main problem was the light in the bedroom - damn those energy-saving light bulbs!!! - Gareth, ran out to the car, like a hero, and got his maglite!!! That was an experience!??! - Gareth proudly shining, and focusing, his high powered torch between my legs. Hahaha!!!
It took less than 10mins from calling the senior MW, to the time she arrived. Jacky was the lady, for the stitches!!! She was about 50 I'd say, and had an air of confidence. So then there were 5 midwives!!!! Soon after Jacky had arrived, Jill and Chris left, leaving me after lots of hugs and cuddles, with 3 MW‘s (the take over 2, and the senior mw to do the stitches). It was strange to be totally aware of all the contraptions they had brought; each cylinder had to be signed off, and also the medi-vac and portable incubator - in case of arrest. I had no idea, there was absolutely loads of it!!! They were so prepared for everything.
It does sound so silly, to say, but I was worried about the stitching - I was tender. As they touched me, I winced with pain. I even said "Gosh, what a wuss you think I must be!!!" They assured me that, my natural pain relief was gone, and it was normal. They gave me a novocaine injection into my bottom, vagina, and around my vulva (the injection was really painful, I even had gas and air for the injection being done!!! - if you read this and think what a plonker, I understand - but that was pain!!!! Child birth isn’t pain, it’s something entirely different! Anyway, after that - nothing, nothing at all was felt!!). I watched to amazement, via the mirror, as they stitched delicately between my legs.
So after the stitching, all but one of the MW’S had left, and most was cleared away, we all had cup of tea together, and the MW was happy, we were happy, so left.
We settled down to feed again and after all the excitement had died away at about 1am, we all went to sleep. Happy and healthy and totally in love with each other!!! (Gareth had never held me so tight!!)
Thank you for reading my family story!.. and a thanks for all the help and advice this site has offered me from, mummies, expectant mummies, and some men, all over the English speaking world!!!
A special thanks goes to all my wonderful MW's; their support, training, advice, and friendship - fantastic!!!! Thank you so much xxx
The pictures!!!
From the first 2 pictures, you can see it was almost totally dark! I'm sorry ladies (and some gents) for the odd boob and cord on show! …..and my inexplicable hair - but I blame that on being really hot, and the water spray I used - thank goodness for hair bands!!
Thank you for sharing.
