Homebirth- wise for me or not?

[Beckster30]

Hi Ladies,

Have read lots of threads on here and it's really made me want a homebirth again! I'd like some opinions on whether I should ask for a homebirth again and if you think it's even advisable. I'll try and keep this short but please bear with me!

I have 3 kiddos, 1st DD traumatic labour, rushed from local birth centre, scary for DH and I, very long labour ended in ventouse delivery, stitches and swab left in which was only discovered after a few days (but thats a different story!) 2nd DD induced at 10 days but was a lovely, relaxed, relatively short labour 5.5 hours, 2nd stage only 1 minute. DS 3 years ago, was all set up for a homebirth, very excited about it but after several unsuccessful sweeps and totally miserable at 12 days overdue decided to give in and be induced. My waters were broken at 2.30pm, put on a syntocin drip and he was born at 8.30pm. But despite it being a hospital birth, midwife was wonderful, minimal fussing, dim lighting and I kind of got myself into my own hypnotic state, totally in tune with my body (didn't know anything about hypnobirthing then) I managed fine with gas and air and he was born a very healthy 10lbs 13.5ozs. Trouble is the placental site was so huge I bled a lot after and they kept the syntocin drip going all night to try and slow the bleeding down. Once I was home all the midwives that visited said it was a good thing I ended up delivering in hospital because of the complications afterwards.

My midwife this time is lovely and they are very pro homebirth here but she has said a couple of times it would probably be best to deliver in hospital again incase I end up having another big un. I'm hoping to have a hypno birth this time around, reading the maria mongan book and eagerly awaiting my natal cd and feeling very positive and excited about the birth but would really like to try and have it at home, if only I could be more patient when I go overdue! My next appt is next tuesday when I'll be 36 weeks, is it too late to ask then? This baby is measuring right on target and I don't feel anywhere as big as I did with DS, do you think I should go for it?

If you've got this far, thankyou!! and sorry for the waffle

 

[Jenniflower]

Not a waffle at all!! You've had quite a few experiences so obviously we needed to know them Firstly, 36 weeks is definitely not too late to decide on a home birth, you could hold out until 38 if you wanted! It's whenever you decide that matters.

Let's see... reading on, I would say it sounds like your body totally knows what to do you've just had a very different pregnancy for each birth. If you don't mind me asking what was the trauma involved in the first pregnancy?

You don't sound like bleeding after births is quite a normal thing, you just happened to have a big one at the time so it caused some problems. That said there's no reason why you couldn't have just been transferred and hooked up that way anyways. It's only a "good thing you were in hospital" because it meant you didn't have to deal with the stress of transferring. But that's a really silly thing to say because everything is better in hindsight.

My opinion, and it's only mine, would be to say definitely go for the home birth if it's something you're interested especially, as you say, you're bubs is right on target and not looking like a chunker. I think even your midwife would agree there's no reason to assume this one will be big, especially if they're measuring just fine. I would give one bit of advice though. Stop getting induced! hahaha. Trust that bubs will come when they're ready. Even if it's passed the 10-12 days they usually allow just ask for monitoring. You have less need for interventions during and after if you let LO come on their own accord.

 

[Beckster30]

Thank you so much Jenni for taking the time to read and for your great advice!

Don't mind you asking at all, I think my first was kind of a typical long slow first birth and if I'd known then what I know now I wouldn't have got so excited so early and just rested to build up energy for what was coming. In short I was in the birthing pool in local birthing centre and DD's heartrate began to dip quite low with each contraction. Without really being told anything at the time was whisked into ambulance and blue lighted to main hospital half an hour away. So when I say traumatic, it was especially for my DH who was told nothing by midwife and was left standing outside the unit while he waited for his Mum to collect him to follow us. When he arrived an hour later he was a mess and had thought he'd lost the both of us Anyway I ended up developing an infection during labour, the delivery ended up being ventouse because her heartrate was still dipping and I suppose I just found the whole thing quite brutal, there was about 6 people in the room at the end and it was so far removed from what I had envisioned. In the days that followed the pain from my stitches was getting worse, I was still spiking a fever and on the day after I was discharged, 4 days after the birth, I went to the loo and a swab fell out, it had been left in when I was stitched up. The fever I had was from that. So I found the whole thing during and after traumatic and had a very hard time bonding with my daughter and developed severe PND after.

The births of my 2 youngest after that seemed a breeze in comparison and really enjoyed both labours.

You're right about the bleed and the midwife did say it would have just given them a panic with the blood, but all that would have happened like you say is I would have been transferred, no biggie really and they're trained to deal with these situations!

I had a long chat with DH last night and he thinks going for it a home birth again is a great idea, it also solves a lot of practical issues for us like childcare etc I have also told him not to let me cave and get induced if there is no problem When you're overdue every day seems like a week but actually it is still such a short time and baby WILL arrive when he is ready. Just need to stay strong I think in the back of my mind last time was the worry that I wouldn't manage with just a couple of little cannisters of G&A but with DS manged just fine with only a bit at the end, so think I'll be totally fine, who knows may manage without this time!

I just love the idea of birthing in my own home and then getting tucked up in bed after with my new baby and a cup of tea

Again thanks for the great advice, I'm looking forward to getting the ball rolling now

 

[Mum2MJ]

I agree, I would def book it anyway, you can always change your mind if that's what you want to do - good luck x

 

[Beckster30]

I agree, I would def book it anyway, you can always change your mind if that's what you want to do - good luck x

Thank you! I'm getting really excited about it now, just hoping MW will be on board, I know they can't refuse as such but it would be nice to have her support!