How did you know you were ready to try?

MillieJoan

WTT for #2 late 2013 :-)
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Hi everyone,

Well, I'm going to apologize in advance b/c this is probably going to be a bit long. My DH and I have been TTC #2 since June without success, and we already have a 21 month-old daughter. My period returned when DD was 9 months-old, but it never got back to "normal," and my luteal phase was consistently short (anywhere from 8-10 days). I started acupuncture for fertility in August, along with taking some Chinese herbs, did manage to get pregnant last month, but it ended in a chemical. This month, my cycle has been really weird - my body kept gearing up to ovulate and then not, and then at one point I thought I HAD ovulated b/c my temps rose for three days, only to get a positive OPK (my first of the cycle) on the 3rd day! I also used progesterone cream, on my acupuncturist's advice, after what I *think* was my actual ovulation (after the positive OPK). THEN I had cramping 3-5 days after that, then no symptoms at all except awful carpal tunnel, which I had when I was pregnant with DD. I've started get cramps again the last few days (I'm 12 DPO today), and I'm pretty sure AF is coming; my pregnancy tests have all been negative, and without any other symptoms, I truly don't believe it worked this month.

The thing is, this month ttc was ridiculously stressful for both me and my DH. I have vulvodynia, which makes "traditional" sex painful, and DH gets performance anxiety whenever he knows I'm ovulating. :dohh: We did manage to dtd for basically a week straight, from the time I first got EWCM to a day or so after my positive OPK. But it was awful lol. Add that to the fact that we just moved to a new house and are still trying to paint and get things organized, plus that DH started a business recently that he's working hard to get off the ground, and my own anxiety about having both a toddler and a newborn and... well, yeah.

So I guess my question is this: How did you all know it was time to try for a baby, whether it's your first or second or third or whatever? Both DH and I really want a sibling for our daughter, and we'd like them to be close enough in age for them to actually enjoy playing together. We're also not positive we won't want a 3rd child, and I'd like to leave some wiggle-room for when we'd ttc that one (I'm 28 now, almost 29, and would like to have a few years after the 2nd, if we want, before feeling we should ttc again before I get too old!).

DH says he's thinking he'd like to wait a year - oh, I should add that we're hoping to conceive before February so we don't have a dead-of-winter baby, since we live in such a snowy climate - and try again next August. He thinks my body will be "back to normal" by then and that we won't have to worry about progesterone cream or anything like that, but I'm not so sure; it's been almost 2 years since DD was born, and my periods still aren't anything like they were before I had her. I'm worried this is just how my cycles are now, that they need some help, you know, and that delaying is just going to give us fewer chances to conceive. I think he's right that all the temping, etc, is stressing me out, trying to interpret every sign; but b/c I just had the miscarriage, I feel like it would be incredibly irresponsible not to use progesterone, and for that I need to pinpoint ovulation.

Ok, I'll end this now... I guess I'm just really looking for reassurance. I feel like DH is waiting for the perfect time to try again, and I don't think there ever will be one. His business is hopefully going to pick up in the next few years, which means he'll be even busier, and who knows what else might come up? It just seems like if we want another child, and we do, we should go for it, and take each day as it comes if we're lucky enough to conceive, but I also know that from a practical standpoint we do have a lot going on right now.

Thanks for reading, if you made it through that novel lol! :flower:
 

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