how much free time do you get?

[catty]

I feel like I need to organise my time better so that I can get some more 'me' time

im at home all day with kids (usually go out but you know what I mean)
Then I drop them off at my MIL'S at 4.30pm and go straight to work where I work 5-8pm I get home about 8.20pm and heat up my food, eat, make bottles, put washing on, clean and get things organised for the next day. If im lucky I MIGHT have time to watch an episode of hollyoaks, browse this forum then off to bed.
Just feeling so tired and like I cant get out the bit.
I have 2 days off a week but because I work shifts il sometimes work 7 days in a row then get 2 off.
OH cant help much more as he works allday then picks the kids up, feeds lucas, gives evie a bottle and gets them to bed.
starting to think I was silly to take on this job!

So is this 'normal' in adult life? I used to have so much free time I didnt know what to do with it all

 

[Natasha2605]

I definitely think it's normal. It's very hard finding that balance between children,housework, cleaning etc. I work full time over 4 days 32 hours. Usually 2 8-4s and 2 2-10s a week. My kids go to bed no later than seven every night. My evenings are completely mine if I am not working. Tonight I've watched The Biggest Loser USA all night curled on the couch. I worked all day so it's my time to chill ( OH works nights).

I do get a lot of free time compared to others but I am very organised to allow me to do so. My house is spotless (always is as I keep on top of it all the time), kids stuff is out for tomorrow and my time is my own.

 

[catty]

I need to get organised! I still havnt even got the toys organised from xmas and there is sooo many!
They are actually a total hazard my son tripped over a toy and we ended up in a&e on boxing day but still there is crap everywhere. I seriosly am considering a cleaner but do you think there is such a thing as someone that could come and just generally organise my life for me haha like cupboards etc.
I mostly love being a family doing all the mummy stuff but sometimes I just want to be a slob and sit and be uninterrupted whilst I watch a 30 min tv show


edit - just realised that made me sound pretty bad, I did put all the toys away but my son wants everything out at once and continually pulls over all the storage boxes so there is toys everywhere.

 

[Natasha2605]

I need to get organised! I still havnt even got the toys organised from xmas and there is sooo many!
They are actually a total hazard my son tripped over a toy and we ended up in a&e on boxing day but still there is crap everywhere. I seriosly am considering a cleaner but do you think there is such a thing as someone that could come and just generally organise my life for me haha like cupboards etc.
I mostly love being a family doing all the mummy stuff but sometimes I just want to be a slob and sit and be uninterrupted whilst I watch a 30 min tv show


edit - just realised that made me sound pretty bad, I did put all the toys away but my son wants everything out at once and continually pulls over all the storage boxes so there is toys everywhere.

As your kids get older your free time becomes greater I've found. My two will be three (in eight weeks) and five in May and nowadays can take themselves upstairs to play for up to 60-90 minutes at a time. My life and house wasn't as organised up until the last year or so.

My two also help by tidying up after themselves etc so that's a good help as Im not always tidying at the back of them, it'll be different for you at the minute

Eta. I'm looking forward to February when I start my college course (through work done at home) as at least I'll be using my free time more meaningfully.

 

[pompeyvix]

I would say I get a fair amount of 'me time'. I work 3 days a week, but am out of the house from 7.30-6pm, so it's a full day out. The other 4 days I am with my LO. During the days, it is so busy, I barely get chance to think. However, I get most evenings to myself. We take it in turns to put Anabella to bed, but she is normally asleep between 7.45-8.30 (unless she has had a nap) and I go up to bed anytime between 10.30 & midnight, so I have at least 2 hours per evening, but usually more if Anabella is asleep early or is my husband is doing bed time.

Most Sunday mornings my husband takes Anabella swimming, and they are usually gone a couple of hours. I take the time to study towards my qualification, clean or just watch TV.

I also get a lot more annual leave than my husband (he gets statutory minimum and I get 8 weeks) so I have at a fair amount of time off where Anabella is in Nursery for 2 days, he is at work & I get a day to myself, which is usually spent doing to odd jobs I don't normally get round to doing and just relaxing at home.

I feel satisfied with what I get, but it has definitely got better and easier the older Anabella has become. Your two are still so young, it may be a while until you get lots of me time, but it will come

 

[Pearls18]

I think it's probably normal for the hours you work. I guess my "me time" is in the evening as I work 9-5 3 days a week, on a working day my husband usually puts the boys to bed by 7 during which time I am cooking dinner, he clears away afterwards and he would have already sorted the boys' nursery bags for the next day by the time I am back from work, so we will be sat down by 7.30 usually and in bed about 10.30 (I commute into central London so my days are quite long whereas DH is often finished by 4 so thankfully he's pretty helpful on my work days, he also does the nursery run as it is at his work, but I only work 3 days so I make up for it on my days off!)

Then on the days of the week DH works I would say my downtime is during DS2's nap at 1-3 as DS1 is quite capable of playing independently so i usually sneak something on the tv then!

On the weekends I will sometimes sneak upstairs if I need to chill out for half an hour or so, we alternate lie ins, I will sometimes pop into town to get a coffee and window shop, but generally weekends are family time.

So yeah I do feel like I get plenty of time to myself but I think that is down to a very nice working pattern, but it's much harder going when my husband has to work away, I really feel it as he's so hands on.

 

[Mummy May]

Just evening times when the kids are in bed plus the time when theyre playing nicely haha xx

 

[Larkspur]

I get up at 6.30am, OH and I sort kids, breakfast, showers, get a few quick chores done before work. He's out the door at 8.30am and I start work when the nanny arrives at 9am. In the evenings, he and I alternate meal nights, so if I'm not cooking or resettling the baby, I usually have evenings free from about 7pm till 10pm when I go to bed. Sometimes I catch up on work for an hour or two in the evenings but that's not every week.

We try to get most stuff done Mon-Sat so we have Sunday's free for family stuff.

 

[smileyfaces]

None apart from an hour or so at night time when they go to bed and that is spent clearing up after them before I get an early night.

 

[missk1989]

very little. I work mon-fri and DH works fri-mon so I have lo all weekend alone. I come home from work make tea and put lo to bed as when he is working he gets up at 5 and those he is not he is usually at the gym in the evenings. It is usually 9-9.30 by the time lo is asleep and I usually go to bed shortly after as im exhausted. On the rare days I get of work when lo is in nursery and DH at work I try to split the day between chores and slobbing out in front of the tv.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

About an hour in the eve but generally dont feel or crave anymore? So used to it now x

 

[sue_88]

None.

Single mum, work two days a week, any nap/sleep time is spent cleaning and tidying my house as I need to have it very tidy and organised, anything less won't do.

I generally sit down for my dinner and possibly Eastenders.

Doesn't bother me, I don't have any real need for 'free' time now I have a child.

 

[catty]

Wish I had that mentality. During the day there is always one of them awake, iv tried to get them to nap at the same time but no joy. Maybe once I crack that il feel like I get a little break. Even drinking coffee is impossible around my crazy child.

I do agree once there older I will hopefully get more free time

 

[Pearls18]

I'm sure you will hun, it's bound to be difficult with such a close age gap but I'm sure once you're littlest is bigger and able to play with her big brother it'll be easier, it's much easier now my youngest is 1, harder in other ways but definitely less hands on constantly as it is with much younger babies.

I for one need my own down time, I love my kids to pieces but I would go stir crazy if I never had time to myself or just me and hubby, I need part of my day to not revolve around snotty noses, constant demands or something that needs cleaning lol, I've never proclaimed to be a mummy martyr lol, I'm just me

 

[x__amour]

Just at night when everyone is sleeping.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I just dont find it that bad at home? Lol though they will get easier and play together x

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Sometimes i even end up going to bed same time as eldest then wake up start all over again. Such is life and this is mine.

 

[smileyfaces]

Sometimes i even end up going to bed same time as eldest then wake up start all over again. Such is life and this is mine.

Snap!

 

[Pearls18]

I don't find it bad either but everything has a limit I don't want my entire life to be childcare and cleaning I am a person too, I love watching The Walking Dead with a bar of chocolate I can't do that around a 4 year old for many reasons lol! I like to have a bath with candles without toys being thrown in and someone trying to wash my hair with a flannel lol. I like to walk around the shops without having my arm tugged saying he's bored, needs a wee, leg suddenly hurts. I like to cuddle up on the sofa with hubby without having 2 jealous children screaming at me. Becoming a mother didn't change everything about me, I could give you a long list of all the things I love doing with my boys, I wouldnt change my life for anything and I am very happy, but I am happy because I get time to myself also.

I hate this guilt trip I see way too often on this site that we should feel bad if heaven forbid we don't love everything about motherhood 100% of the time, this pretence that we all believe we're the best mothers ever, we must cease to exist. And just because someone admits to needing a break sometimes doesn't make them a bad person or that they find anything at home "bad".

 

[smileyfaces]

I think everyone would love all that me time to do all those things but reality is that it just doesnt happen for a lot of people