How Often Does Your OH Go Out

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by peanutsmommy, Apr 5, 2009.

  1. peanutsmommy

    peanutsmommy Mommii Of 1 & Fiance

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    Me And My OH Have Been Together For Almost 3 Years Now Since Before I Found Out I Was Pregnant We Both Use To Go Out Every Weekend But Since I've Been Pregnant I Told Him It Bothered Me That He Still Goes Out Every Weekend I Wouldnt Mind If It Was Every Other Weekend But He Thinks I Am Crazy For Feeling The Way I Do But Am I ?
     
  2. Laura--x

    Laura--x Guest

    Its a no win situation really. Both side is a fair view imo. Obviously, it's hard for you to see him still going out every weekend when you can't do that anymore, but why should he stop going out? I think it's unfair to tell/expect him not to go out, yet i completely see where your coming from.

    This was the biggest arguement me n oh used to have in the first half of my pregnancy, he was still going out alot and of course i couldn't anymore and would moan at him everytime he did, but then i realised, well he can't be doing this when the babys here so he might aswell enjoy it as much as he can now.
     
  3. sarah_george

    sarah_george ♥Proud Mummy!♥

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    It would be nice i guess if he was considerate enough to stay in with you every other weekend, that does sound reasonable to me xxx
     
  4. Pyrrhic

    Pyrrhic Well-Known Member

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    Agree with Laura.

    My OH probably goes out once every 3 months and that's only when he's dragged out by his squadron. Usually he just moans that it's no fun if I don't come out too.

    How old is he? Maybe he's still at the age/maturity when going out is what he wants to do? Over here the drinking age is 18, and my OH is 30 this year so he'd rather have a nice meal out than get wasted.
     
  5. butrfly

    butrfly Mom to Sweet Elijah

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    just like rafwife's OH, mine prefers good food over a night of drinking. and he also complains it's not as fun without me along. he rarely goes out, and when he does, it's usually for dinner out with me. :) i think i'm so blessed with him. :)
     
  6. My OH goes out every week due to his job. But to be honest I enjoy the space in the bed :rofl: He needs time out the house and I need the house to myself sometimes.
     
  7. BigDan1

    BigDan1 Active Member

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    I haven't been out drinking since Ashleigh found out she was pregnant. I told her I wouldn't drink alcohol either but I have the odd pint every now and then
     
  8. dizzy duck

    dizzy duck Mummy to Oliver

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    My DH is the same as rafwifes and butrfly, It takes a lot for me to get him out :rofl:, even if he did go out more I wouldn't mind, he shouldn't have to stop because I couldn't go out. Im just lucky he is like me and we would rather be together then go out and get wasted. Take care :hugs: XX
     
  9. Jkelmum

    Jkelmum Well-Known Member

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    My husband never goes out if he does its me dragging him ...he is older then me and has had is fair nights out now he would rather be at home on pc or sumat x
     
  10. Tishimouse

    Tishimouse Fairy Godmother - really!

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    I would mind if I am honest. Every now and then (even every second weekend would be acceptable) fine, but EVERY weekend is selfish in my eyes. He's thinking of himself and not his pregnant wife, which shows immaturity in my eyes. I love Big Dan's attitude as it shows amazing commitment, love and a well balance sense of responsibility to becoming a father. The female has a lot to put up with as it is their body that has to undergo such drastic changes, not to mention hormones. It might do him good to read a few educational books as to the changes his partner is going through so that he could be more considerate to her feelings. Perhaps a long sit down and healthy chat about this would be beneficial as it sounds like he needs to become responsible now, not wait until the baby is born.

    I hope you are OK and not feeling too upset about this and that you can find some happy medium between you to make things better. :hugs:
     
  11. MummyMummy

    MummyMummy Well-Known Member

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    idon't see why they should tbh, it takes two to make a baby why the girl should just suffer is beyond me. the blokes want the kid too, they should gothrough what we are! i think you are being reasonable, he should stop being so selfish - your body is going through alot of changes right now, least he could do is miss 1 weekend of going out.

    when i was with my ex that's what we argued about aaaall the time. he still wanted to go out and drink (i even found texts on his phone saying that he'can't even mention the word lager these days' and the bint replied back that i 'wasn't dying... just pregnant' she'd never been preg in her life might i add!!!! and looking at her face she'd have to have a bag over it for somebody to even attempt :x) even though isaid ididn't like itand i missed going out (before iwas preg i'd beout all the time would drink/smoke/usesunbeds everything that was bad i did i stoped all that as soon as i found out i was preg and even had to leave col because i had spd/pgp so thatpreg hit me really really hard). preg hormones don't help matters either.



    with mynew partner things are great - i didn't drink/smoke/use sunbeds/do everything else that was badbefore we decided we would 'see what happens' so not much changed, appart fromagain me not being able to move due to spd/pgp - but we spoke about this when seeing 'what would happen' and we both knew what to expect. my partner decided that what i couldn't do he wouldn't do which i appreciate so so much! it makes it alot easier to say no to patte when he does too :D lol. we have never argued about it once although i've told him numerous times i wouldn't mind him drinking/eating what i can't, and gods honest truth is iwouldn't mind.i feel alot betterabout this preg, think it has alot to do with me actually wanting this preg asaposed to my 1st were we werejust stupid about using protection. although him going out would still p me off as i havespd/pgp again and me moving much isn't really possible, so i'd be sat in onmy own alone as i seem to do all day everyday and tbh i really look forward to him finishing work so i actually have somebody to talk to,just to bearound, that's the part that would bother me, not the drinking alcohol part. wenever did that before pregnancy - we have far more important thingsthe spend £100-£200 a night on.
    xXx
     
  12. lisac25

    lisac25 mum to 2 beautiful girls♥

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    unless my oh has friends birthdays etc he prob only goes out on his own about once a month if that sometimes, but the same as you before my first daughter was born we used to go out every weekend, u might find he changes once bubs is here, some men find it hard to associate and change to meet a mother and babys needs untill it is actually here x
     
  13. MelanieSweets

    MelanieSweets Ridleys Mummy x

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    My mans never been one for drinking or anything if we used to go out he would go out with his friends and i would with mine, but to be honest since we got serious we just love being together, i miss him when i go out he misses me, but to be honest we would prefer to go for a nice meal or go out with friends together, i feel quite blessed really he has barely drunk since i got pregnant. :cloud9::cloud9:
     
  14. mrsholmes

    mrsholmes Well-Known Member

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    I had the same prob OH expected to go out the same amount when I got pg, but Ive put my foot down, we really havent got the money anymore! he plays football on a saturday and ideally would like to go for a 'pint' every sat but we have agreed on twice a month, however it will be much less than that when LO is born. he does only go to the old mans pub tho and is normally home between 9 and 10!
     
  15. kaykay

    kaykay Well-Known Member

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    I feel a bit bad now actually My Oh has been out drinking maybe twice during my whole pregnancy and even then he got a good moaned at, for it! I understand where you coming from, why should he have all the fun whilst were sitting at home. I think I'm going give the oh abit more freedom for the last 4 weeks coz he may resent it later as I will not allow him to go out every weekend when there is a baby around. She half his too!! x
     
  16. starryeye31

    starryeye31 2nd tri ~Its A Boy ~

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    My dh dont go out , the only places he goes is to work or to help his elderly friend , His friends house caught on fire a few weeks ago so he goes over there a few times a week because he is putting all new drywall up for him but other then that he really dont go any place without me . we have been together for 15 years and he has never really went out years ago he would go fishing when we lived in Alaska and I couldnt go out on a boat because I was pregnant .
     
  17. Lara+sam+bump

    Lara+sam+bump Well-Known Member

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    Me and OH live 250 miles apart most of the time, and he still only goes out drinking about twice a month, but he is 21 and he wont be able to go out once he finishes uni and is living with me and LO, next year. So I just let him get on with it although I do feel jealous sometimes. But when im staying wid him or him wid me (which is his hometown) he doesnt go out wid out me, although we always go out places like the cinema, dinner, the pub (me on the lemonade lol) otherwise i'd go crazy. xxxx
     
  18. soup

    soup Well-Known Member

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    sorry but i don't understand why so many ladies on here are saying that they can't go out? fair enough you can't drink but i don't see that as a reason to stay home. my husband goes out about every other weekend sometimes more sometimes less, but i go with him. we have always gone out with our friends at the weekends not ness out drinking but doing something, obviously once babies here that will change but i don't see why until he is here we should stop. and even once he is we intend to still go out with friends just doing different things, or having friends over our house.

    we went out last night and i did come home earlier that DH but that doesn't bother me in the slightest as i just wasn't in the mood.

    i can see how it could be irritating if your always being left home alone, and this is a selfish thing for your oh to do. hope i haven't offended anyone just my opinion!
     
  19. codex

    codex Well-Known Member

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    LOL I am with you on this one...I love the time to myself. That and when my little one is here is wants to spend TONS of time with her so it's his time now before she makes her appearance :D
     
  20. AnnaHughes

    AnnaHughes Well-Known Member

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    I was thinking the same sort of thing! - we never did do a lot in the week before I was pregnant - due to not getting in from work till late - by the time cooked tea, and eaten it, the only thing we wanted to do was sit down and rest! However, most weekends we have been out - together, and its not been a problem - although whereas before it would have just been a trip to the pub, we now try to go for a curry or cheap meal ( nice restaraunt just once a month!) and DH still drinks ( and gets drunk!)

    There are a couple of occasions he has gone out with his mates, and I have loved the evening to myself.

    We are both of the opinion that once the baby arrives, we wont be able to spontaneously just say 'lets go out' so making the most of it now, but it does usually involve both of us, so I can see why ladies on here are annoyed if they are staying at home while OH gets to have all the fun!
     

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