How often is your husband able to "perform"?

[irishMARY]

hi there girls

great forum. have been reading it for a while and now making my first post...

my husband and i are both in our early 30s and have been ttc for about 9 months, with charting ovulation etc for the past 6 mo or so.
i have had my bloods / hormone levels checked on d2 and d21 and they are grand.

my cycle is a bit irregular and we have found my ovulation varies between d14-21 on different cycles, so we have been using an ovulation monitor to help there and trying to have sex regularly from day10 - 25 to try and ensure we dont miss ovulation...

one issue we have been having is that my husband can usually manage to DTD for 2 days in a row, but on the 3rd day he won't be able to reach ejaculation (he has no problem getting an erection). he says he feels empty, as if he hasn't had time to make enough sperm again...
than after that he can usually ejeaculate every 2nd day.

do any of you other couples out there have a similar problem? when we were younger he was able to DTD at any time, often several times aday! and he feels it is more physical than psychological.

so just wondering how frequently other men in their early 30s are able to ejaculate, as maybe its normal for his age, or if not then maybe he should get checked out...

thanks all!

 

[Scottishgem]

My husband is 29 and to be honest he said that we started to ttc he would love it if we dtd everyday, but reality is alot different, with him working days and me working nights and after 3 days in a row we kinda gave it up and to be honest even after three days, he struggled to maintain an erection and it became like a chore to be honest and neither of us really enjoyed it. Maybe their was too much pressure on the both of you as you know that you are trying to have a baby, you might just need to relax and just dtd every other day or maybe you could try different things, like spicing it up and changing it around to stop the pressure. Hope some of that helps.

 

[prepping]

My DH is 31 and I think it is likely quite normal. I think we just notice more now that we want the goods! Before TTC, it wasn't a problem that he didn't finish as it just meant there was less likelihood of getting pregnant. So it was a bonus!

Again with my DH, he has no problem with erections, it's just a bit tedious that he sometimes turns into stamina man when I kind of want it to be bing bang boom. Again, I think it's normal enough. Try not to stress out and put yourselves under pressure. Like "they" all seem to say, it's not uncommon for a perfectly healthy couple to sometimes take a year to become pregnant. Hope it's soon for you two!

GL!

 

[SillyHale]

My DH is 30 and some months he does great with the "schedule" of sex. And some months it's too much. For the last couple months I've totally layed off him and now he asks me when our good days are for sex. He wants to have a baby as much as I do but some men may think they want lots of sex and then it becomes too much. I figure as long as I get a positive opk and do it around then we'll eventually become pregnant. If not I'll go to the doctors once we've been trying for a year and see if anything is wrong. I think every other day is fine or every 3 days. I think that's lots so hopefully you'll fall pg soon But if he misses a couple days don't stress.

 

[Baby2012]

I like this thread!

My OH is 32 and he can do two days in a row max. We tried SMEP last month and on the 3rd day of us dtd my poor OH got sick. We still tried to DTD as like you ladies have said getting an errection is no issue but my OH has also said that on the 3rd day he feels "empty" like he just can't come.

It's weird because back in the day we'd dtd nearly every day I've seen some threads about dtd every day and I think "oh man" we can't do that but then I think it takes one lucky time and good timing so as long as we know when I'm O'ing and we DTD around that time we must hit jackpot soon.

I'm trying not to put too much pressure on us or him and I want to keep TCC as fun and stressfree as possible. We both want to be pregnant NOW but we know that it'll happen when it happens.

Good luck all and I'll be keeping an eye on this thread x

 

[citymouse]

it's just a bit tedious that he sometimes turns into stamina man when I kind of want it to be bing bang boom.

LOL, this exactly!

I think I need to give DH a day off. We're at 5 out of 6 days and he seems scared of me.

 

[FragileDoll]

My DH and I are in our early 20s and we BD 2 days in a row sometimes 3 and then take a one day break. My DH never had any erection problems, but I feel less sex-drive when we BD every other day constantly and it seems more like a job.

 

[irishMARY]

Thanks all for your replies. that is reassuring!
yeah, trying not to take it too seriously and keeping it fun as possible!

ha ha, i know exactly what you mean prepping! -

.. it's just a bit tedious that he sometimes turns into stamina man when I kind of want it to be bing bang boom.
GL!

good luck all

 

[artsiekat]

Hubby would never want to admit he has problems, but I notice little changes when we do it a lot. Like he doesn't hold an erection during foreplay as well, gets tired or crampy more often. Sometimes he turns into stamina man, as well, which I do not want! I'm more of a quick gal myself and will dry out quickly if it takes longer than 15 mins.

I think more often than not, our men have problems the more they are afraid they'll have problems. Though they'll never admit it's in their heads. I think they get so caught up with being "manly" and feeling like they should want to do it everyday that it makes it even harder to do it everyday. If that makes sense.

 

[loveacupcake]

I think I need to give DH a day off. We're at 5 out of 6 days and he seems scared of me.

OMG this! SO Much!

After BDing 5 days in a row during my fertile period, we took one day off and then I initiated the next night and he actually said No! LOL it was 2am after he had been studying all night and we both had to get up early for work but I thought it was so funny.

 

[artsiekat]

I think I need to give DH a day off. We're at 5 out of 6 days and he seems scared of me.

OMG this! SO Much!

After BDing 5 days in a row during my fertile period, we took one day off and then I initiated the next night and he actually said No! LOL it was 2am after he had been studying all night and we both had to get up early for work but I thought it was so funny.

Poor hubby's! This should teach them, be careful what you wish for!

 

[Missclarabel]

It's so refreshing to hear other stories like this! Before we were TTC it would prob have been nice a week for us and nw that we're trying to step it up it's proving a bit trickier! Last month DH couldn't finish the 2 days around o and I got really upset as felt our chance was wasted! I know it's not good for either of us to feel like that and it def puts pressure on him! So tried to relax more this month and am happy with every other day leading up to OV.

Good luck ladies x

 

[MurphyTaylor]

My OH is 21 in 2 weeks and he has trouble 'performing'. It seems that he just doesn't want sex that often - frustrating for me as I'm the complete opposite to him! We gradually BD more during ovulation time but in between it's pratically never
TBH I wish it would change but I just don't know what to try

 

[Pamcakes]

Hubby and I are in our mid twenties and we struggle with every other day sometimes. Sometimes you just want to snuggle! I'm starting to think a turkey baster is not a half bad idea, how much more sleep would we get!

 

[MurphyTaylor]

Hubby and I are in our mid twenties and we struggle with every other day sometimes. Sometimes you just want to snuggle! I'm starting to think a turkey baster is not a half bad idea, how much more sleep would we get!

My mind is going exactly the same way! Less stress, less effort + more sleep! Top idea haha

 

[josephine3]

Hubby and I are in our mid twenties and we struggle with every other day sometimes. Sometimes you just want to snuggle! I'm starting to think a turkey baster is not a half bad idea, how much more sleep would we get!

My mind is going exactly the same way! Less stress, less effort + more sleep! Top idea haha

i agree.. lol how old do we sound. im 24 i feel like 44!!

 

[MarcsPinkLady]

I think I need to give DH a day off. We're at 5 out of 6 days and he seems scared of me.

OMG this! SO Much!

After BDing 5 days in a row during my fertile period, we took one day off and then I initiated the next night and he actually said No! LOL it was 2am after he had been studying all night and we both had to get up early for work but I thought it was so funny.

Poor hubby's! This should teach them, be careful what you wish for!

How funny! DH has been so laidback about the whole thing that he really just realized that we actually are trying. He is so funny! Now he wants to DTD every day. We will see how long that lasts....not that we should be doing it that often anyway. LOL

 

[artsiekat]

I think I need to give DH a day off. We're at 5 out of 6 days and he seems scared of me.

OMG this! SO Much!

After BDing 5 days in a row during my fertile period, we took one day off and then I initiated the next night and he actually said No! LOL it was 2am after he had been studying all night and we both had to get up early for work but I thought it was so funny.

Poor hubby's! This should teach them, be careful what you wish for!

How funny! DH has been so laidback about the whole thing that he really just realized that we actually are trying. He is so funny! Now he wants to DTD every day. We will see how long that lasts....not that we should be doing it that often anyway. LOL

We're on our 4th day in a row of BDing! I think hubby is actually still having too much fun, I'm getting tired, though!

I don't want to miss my ovulation window, though!

 

[dianndelto]

MY DH is turning 25 in 7 days and as young as he is, every other day. I guess we work a lot. I try to get everymonth during O' time some free time we can play! lol
wear something sexy. When you are baby dancing for TTC, it gets boring. try to spice it up although I know its hard. Good luck to you

 

[TeddyBearPug]

We do it every other day starting on cd 9 or 10 up until ovulation. Last month i ovulated later than normal cd19/20? By that time he was all sexed out! It is hard for my husband to finish closer to ovulation. He says if he drinks alot of water before sex it helps him ejaculate, i think its weird, but whatever works i guess! If we don't get pregnant this month, i think next month will be less sex!