How true!! Pregnancy, Oestrogen and Women

Discussion in 'Just For Fun' started by Layla, Sep 6, 2007.

  1. Layla

    Layla Well-Known Member

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    Just been sent this, thought it was funny...

    Subject: Pregnancy, Oestrogen and Women

    Pregnancy, Oestrogen and Women
    Pregnancy Q & A & more!

    Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
    A: No, 35 children is enough.

    Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
    A: With any luck, right after he finishes university.

    Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
    A: Childbirth.

    Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's
    borderline irrational.
    A: So what's your question?

    Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labour, but
    pressure. Is she right?
    A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

    Q: When is the best time to get an epidural? A: Right after you find out
    you're pregnant.

    Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is
    in labour?
    A: Not unless the word "divorce"
    means anything to you.

    Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
    A: Yes, pregnancy.

    Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
    A: Not if you change the baby's nappy very quickly.

    Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act
    normal again?
    A: When the kids are in university.






    "OESTROGEN ISSUES"
    10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "OESTROGEN ISSUES"

    1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
    2. You're adding chocolate to your cheese omelette.
    3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
    4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
    5. You're using your mobile phone to dial up every car sticker that says:
    "How's my driving-call 0800-".
    6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
    7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space".
    8 You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.
    9 You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
    10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday..

    TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
    10. Cats' facial expressions.
    9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colours.
    8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
    7. Fat clothes.
    6 Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
    5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell.
    4. Cuttingyour hair to make it grow.
    3. Eyelash curlers.
    2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

    AND, the Number One thing only women understand :
    1. OTHER WOMEN!

    Send this to five bright, funny women (or men)you know and make their
    day . . .
    WE ALL NEED A SMILE
     
  2. Suz

    Suz ~ I are a Nerd ~

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  3. Trinity

    Trinity Well-Known Member

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    Lol .. thats good
     
  4. stephlw25

    stephlw25 Well-Known Member

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    That did make me smile ! all very true !!
     
  5. Tilly

    Tilly Guest

    :happydance:lol nice
     

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