Hysterical crying, any1 else suffering with depression?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by Hattie80, Dec 12, 2009.

  1. Hattie80

    Hattie80 Well-Known Member

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    I've been soo down last couple of days. :nope: I'm so so anxious, worrying about EVERYTHING and it's really taking its toll. I've been in floods of tears today and yesterday to the point where I can't catch my breath. It's not ova just 1 thing but loads of things, generally feeling crap.
    What makes it worse is that OH and I have been arguing about my morbidity .... he doesn't understand and then gets angry and frustrated which makes me even more upset. :cry: He can't cope with me being so introverted (haven't wanted to see any1 or go anywhere) and so just leaves me on my own at home.
    I'm usually really chatty but when I get like this I just can't communicate and become very reclusive and introverted. He thinks I'm just attention seeking, which I'm not - I just feel so sad. :cry: I've suffered from depression and been on med in past. So worried it's coming back. I love this baby sooo much and am so worried about how my moods r affecting him. Will he be in distress when I'm crying? Has any1 else felt like this / have any advice? I need any help I can get. Thanx in advance xx
     
  2. Daisymac

    Daisymac Guest

    I am on meds for my depression and i am allowed to stay on them during pregnancy, but even on the meds i have off days! Like today..... i have had such a bad day with one thing and another and i hope to god i wake up feeling better tommorrow!

    I know its a horrible thing, depression, and i get morbidity too. I can give myself panic attacks from thinking of bad things that could happen!!! I feel like a freak sometimes!

    Maybe a visit to your gp is on the cards. the actual crying itself wont harm baby but your blood pressure could go up from being upset. Maybe your gp could put you back on your meds, its advisable to not have a depressed stressed pregnant mom and it could lead to post natal depression once baby is born.

    All the best hun, hope things go well for you and you manage to sort something out xx
     
  3. Daisymac

    Daisymac Guest

    Hasnt anyone else got any words of support for Hattie????:shrug:
     
  4. natasja32

    natasja32 Mum to 4 boys

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    Hey lovely...Im so sorry you are feeling so down at the moment. I know how you feel sweetie,ive suffered from depression for years. I was on meds and had seen a therapist which both helped. But even on my meds i got bad days. Its really difficult when you feel like that,and it makes it worse when people say snap out of it. They dont understand that if we could we would. My hubby struggled with understanding how i felt too. I wrote him a letter telling him how i felt and what i would like from him when i feel down.He has gotten alot better,and sometimes i still have to remind him i dont want to feel this way i just cant. You can always send me a pm if you want to talk sweetie.:hugs: As for being an introvert and not talking,you are doing really well as you have just told us all how you are feeling! Well done you!:hugs:

    Lots of love
    Nat
    xx
     
  5. Lollypod

    Lollypod Well-Known Member

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    Hi, so sorry you are feeling down. :flower: Maybe a visit to the docs would be advisable and a chat to your OH may help him to understand a bit more about how you are feeling. I really hope you feel better soon hun :hugs:
     
  6. mizzkizzy

    mizzkizzy Member

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    Hi Hattie, I know how you feel I had depression last year and was on meds for it came off in April and now im preg I have been feeling like im going backwards. OH tries to be supportive but doesn't really understand and like you will leave me at home alone sometimes as he is a very sociable person and usually so am i. Im finding i dont know where my head is at at the moment im so up and down cant figure out if it is depression or just hormones! argh! I have spoke to doc and he said keep an eye on how im feeling and i can go back on meds if i feel i need to. i would go an see your doctor and have a chat with them. Also I have found talking to friends and family about it can help - i couldn't do this before but have forced myself to now and it really does help.

    hope you are ok xxx
     
  7. Mrs.Steer

    Mrs.Steer Well-Known Member

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    I have been going through the exact same thing. I am nearly 16 weeks pregnant and had to take a day and a half of work last week due to uncontrollable, hysterical crying.

    Like you it isn't over just one thing, we have had alot of bad luck at the start of my pregnancy. OH being made rednundant, our car breaking down (so sharing a car for the last 3 months), the oven breaking, the toilet breaking, my dad losing his job, not qualifying for maternity pay in work. So enough fro anyone to be stressed but with pregnancy hormones on top led to a complete breakdown for me.

    In the meantime you have other people around you gushing their excitement about the pregnancy, while you are coping with getting bigger, feeling tired, sick and not being able to turn to your usual vices of the odd drink/ciggy to help you through.

    My OH has been fantastic - listened to me, looked after me etc. but is also trying to be tough with me and forcing me to think differently for the health of the baby. It wasn't easy to do, but as the pregnancy wasn't exactly planned for us, it helped to admit that I was still grieving for my old life and finding it diificult to face the new life that lies ahead with all its additional repsonsibilities.

    In a way I am glad I am going through all the negativity now rather than late. I feel that I have quite a realistic idea of what being a mother involves which is why I am getting more stressed, so hopefully when it actually happens it won't be that much of a shock because I have already emotionally prepared for it during the mini breakdown I am having now!!

    I am not sure if any of this makes sense to you, but I thought you might find it useful to know that you are not alone. All my checks have shown the baby is ok, so I reckon they are quite resilient little things. Also, does your OH know your history with depression? It might just help to tell him what goes on in your mind and explaining that whilst you know most of it is irrational, it is also uncontrollable and reassure him that you still love bubba nad him very much.

    Hope things get better for both of us soon xx
     
  8. Emx

    Emx Mum/Cautiously pregnant

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    Oh hun - just caught this thread, so sorry to hear you are feeling like this xx

    We need to arrange a meet up in the New Year as we are so close to each other - a bit of baby shopping in Oxford? xxx
     
  9. kitabird

    kitabird Mammy to 2 boys

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    I know how you feel hunny. I suffered terrible depression before I got pregnant and the only thing that kept me going was the thought of having a baby. Now though, I'm worrying about everything, especially that I'm not going to be able to take care of the little one because of the depression. Had a hysterical outburst the other day, sobbing and telling my OH that I couldn't do it, he'd be better off without me etc etc. It's really hard to talk about, and when I try he doesn't understand, he thinks I'm trying to make him feel guilty or blame him for doing something wrong, which I'm not at all, the feelings are totally out of my control. I do find that communicating by email/facebook/bnb with friends is the best thing to do, that way you can get out everything you need to and let it vent. Keep typing, don't hold it in! :hugs:
     
  10. littlepne

    littlepne Mum of One :)

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    I've suffered in the past am ok at the moment still have my bad days. I understand how hard it is to explain these feelings to your OH my hubby gets so wound up that he can't help me because I can't explain why I feel bad because most of the time I just don't know myself! Which then makes me feel worse because I know it's making him feel bad that he can't help me.

    I wish I could say something to help you more.

    Jo
     
  11. AimeeM

    AimeeM Mum to 3 Boys.

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    I feel this way too. Some days are so bad. I dropped my dinner on the floor yesterday and totally went psycho and cried my heart out for ages till my head hurt.

    I think maybe it is the extra testosterone. Have a word with your midwife, they can arrange help Hun xx
     
  12. c.c

    c.c 1st baby 3rd trimester

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    my life is your life youve described everything down to a tee! especially with OH and locking yourself away and hoping this ant affecting baby!! your not alone one bit hun... xxxxxxxxxxx :hugs:
     
  13. OskisMum

    OskisMum Well-Known Member

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    I suffered in silence during my first pregnancy, I have never suffered with it before and tried to confide in my MW who said it was perfectly normal to feel like that! Obviously it wasn't and I felt too silly to talk to anyone else about it, unfortunately after giving birth the feelings became stronger, crying more often to the point that one day I cried all day long and ended up calling my new MW and saying that i needed urgent help before I harmed Oscar. She was great I was put on anti d's straight away and helped me through one of the hardest times of my life.

    If I have one bit of advice it would be to talk to somebody now so that you don't go through what I did, it's hard enough dealing with it when you haven't got a newborn, I wouldn't wish those feelings of resentment on anyone. Dont feel ashamed feel proud that you've asked for help.

    Depression in pregnancy is very common, you're about to embark on the biggest journey of your life, your body is changing, everyone else carries on as usual and you sometimes feel you're being left behind. Post natal depression is harder to deal with mainly bcause of the tiredness and pressure on you to love everything about your baby. It's harder to talk to people close to you because they're so happy and can't understand why you feel the way you do.

    There are lots of anti d's suItable during pregnancy.

    Good luck and hope you're feeling more like you again soon

    xxxxxxxx
     
  14. Rachel S

    Rachel S Well-Known Member

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    Thank goodness, thought i was the only one. I had an 'episode' the other day, when i just fell to pieces and ended up having a panic attack, i couldn't breathe and just felt i couldn't control it. My husband didin't know what to do, i just felt overwhelmed by everything, yet put on this smiley face when i go to work and see people and then come home and feel wretched about my pregnancy, my business which isn't doing well, i dont sleep well ever anymore, am dreading xmas, won't get maternity leave, am in a foreign coutry and feel alone in my pregnancy. If it wasn't for this site and you guys i don't know what i would do.
     
  15. tinkerbellita

    tinkerbellita Well-Known Member

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    Rachel S, crikey, your name is the same as my maiden name. I was in Madrid until around 12 weeks and came home as I felt really lonely too but being home hasnt changed anything. In fact the depression has gotten worse. I also wont get anything maternity/money wise either. How are you finding the Spanish bureaucracy? and the doctors? I found them pretty cold but efficcient if anything. I really want to go back but they make it so difficult benefitwise. The UK have it so easy compared to Spain. Hope you feel better soon x x x
     
  16. acdmommy

    acdmommy mother of 4

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    i have to take celexa to help with it and sometimes ativan, i have depression and anxiety issues, it is the worst and needs to be medicated when i am pregnant up to a year after the babe is born...hope you are feeling better
     
  17. FitzBaby

    FitzBaby Me, Hubby,& Toddler

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    You are not alone and dont feel that you are. I read in a few books that depression is actually worse during pregnancy rather than after. In addition, I just can't stop the tears either. Here is a great place to get support but I'd ring your doc as well to see if they can help.
     
  18. Hattie80

    Hattie80 Well-Known Member

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    Thanx 2 every1 who responded to this thread. I have a doc app this eve so going to ask his advice. I'd prefer to not have to go back on pills but if it's best in long term then so be it...

    I'm sooo glad I'm not alone on this one - thought I was going mad!! It's so hard for partners to comprehend as we r meant to constantly be thrilled about impending motherhood but there's so much going on with our minds and changing bodies that the lovely views r sometimes blighted.

    Also, out of interest does any1 know the facts / percentages of women that get postnatal- depression if they r prone to it? Now I'm worrying about that...ARRRGGGHHH!! It's endless! x
     

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