I guess getting on Facebook is more important than naming your baby?*rant*

[October2013]

Sorry girls, I know I'm overreacting here but this has ALWAYS been a BIG, BIG, BIG pet peeve of mine: When I text my bf and instead of responding to me he ignores my text and gets on his Facebook.

This drives me absolutely insane and I know it shouldn't... Chances are he saw my text earlier, was busy, and forgot to respond. But still, it pisses me off to no end when he does this. I've talked to him about my irritation with this before, but nothing changes, even though he says he won't do it anymore.

Since finding out our baby's gender 3 weeks ago, I have been trying diligently to come up with the perfect name. I will search names on the internet and then ask for his opinion on the name, which he never likes what I like, but anyway... So today I texted him and asked about a name that I looked up last night while he was asleep (although I know he won't like it). It's been over three hours since the text was sent and I have yet to hear from him. But of course, he can get on his phone and make some stupid comment on somebody's Facebook status.

I want so badly to call him out on this but I am biting my tongue because I know I'm being immature, controlling and I just need to chill out. But I feel like since he doesn't care enough to text me back his opinion on this name, and since he doesn't like the names I like anyway, I should just say screw it and name her myself without getting his opinion at all! I mean, she's coming out of my body and taking his last name while we aren't married.. So whatever, right?

Again girls, I'm really sorry I'm being such a butthead about this. It just makes me so mad!

Oh yes, I forgot to mention I decided to be cute and send him a sext-message this morning, and he barely responded to it.. He literally just sent me a happy face like this and then told me he made it to the bank... Well, THAT was disappointing. Now I feel like a total goon for writing "I love you" on my bare boobs, taking a picture and sending it to him with the message, "have a G( . )( . )D day".

Either he's really blowing it today or I am just being my overly sensitive self, as usual.

 

[Foxy37]

Men there all the same . Our priorities are so different to there's . I would calmly tell him how you feel xx

 

[LadyMuck80]

I think us preggers ladies need to feel 'sorted' about our forthcoming arrivals! If your OH is anything like my DH he doesn't think we even need to consider names for another 15 weeks or so. Because he knows the baby isn't due for a while, he won't get excited about it, especially as he can't feel the baby move yet. Maybe he'll feel more 'involved' then.

Men, eh?!

 

[Mrs.Mcguin]

I had to ask my OH about this because its personally something I couldn't and wouldn't tolerate. He says if its a rare occurrence for him to do this...then just let it slide basically. But, if he has a habit of being this inconsiderate then that's when you have to really look hard at the relationship because that's a sign he's not into this relationship as much as you are.

Big hugs darling

 

[October2013]

I've told my guy before how I feel when he ignores my texts and gets on Facebook, but it doesn't seem to make a difference because it doesn't change. I wish I could make him understand that he's pretty much my only friend since we moved out of state and I don't work. I can't help that I spend 14+ hours at home by myself, so I want to text him for some company and conversation. He's the only person I really text anymore and before I can make a decision on her name I have to get his opinion, anyway. How hard is it to be like, "Yes I do or no I do not like that name."? I'm just going to give up and leave him alone. I hate being ignored. If I come up with what I feel is the perfect name, I'll let him know.

 

[elle86]

I ask oh to feel baby kick but he is too busy on fb! It's not always but still want to kick him in the face and ask if he felt it that time!

 

[October2013]

HAHA! That's a great idea! When I ask my bf if he wants to feel kicks, he'll come over and put his hand on my belly for literally 30 seconds, feel one kick and then just get back to whatever he was doing. How do guys just not care?? The more I think about this the angrier I'm getting... I suddenly feel like he hasn't done a damn thing for our future baby's arrival and I'm already starting to feel like a single parent! He doesn't research names, research products, look at lists of baby needs... I've done all these things! I put together my entire list of things needed for the baby/ registry items by myself, with no help from anyone (aside from you ladies and online reviews of products).
In his defense, he has made it to every Dr's appt, any time I have a craving he makes sure I get it, and occasionally I'll get a foot rub. But I can't even tell you how tickled I'd be if he actually thought of a few names and asked ME about them, for once. Or if he initiated some baby shopping. I guess it's just too much to ask from guys. Since he works such long hours, 5 days a week, I feel like I'm going to be doing this parenting thing alone, which is terrifying and depressing to me. But I really don't know what else I can do.

 

[October2013]

I had to ask my OH about this because its personally something I couldn't and wouldn't tolerate. He says if its a rare occurrence for him to do this...then just let it slide basically. But, if he has a habit of being this inconsiderate then that's when you have to really look hard at the relationship because that's a sign he's not into this relationship as much as you are.

Big hugs darling

I wouldn't say it happens ALL the time, but it's definitely not a rare occurrence. I mean, it happens more than I want it to. I am now finding myself stalking my own Facebook's news feed to see if he's going to get back on before he replies to my text! I may not be able to continue biting my tongue if he does...
This is crazy girl behavior. I need to chill.

 

[trythisagain]

I had to ask my OH about this because its personally something I couldn't and wouldn't tolerate. He says if its a rare occurrence for him to do this...then just let it slide basically. But, if he has a habit of being this inconsiderate then that's when you have to really look hard at the relationship because that's a sign he's not into this relationship as much as you are.

Big hugs darling

I agree with Mrs.Mcguin as well as her OH. If its once in awhile...fine. I get texts all the time that I forget to answer...but always apologize when I get around to them. If its a constant occurance however...I wouldnt put up with it. Last relationship I was in was exactly that. Turned out he was too busy keeping up with and answering other women than me. Not saying your case is necessarily the same...but imo I wouldnt be ok with it.
As for names etc. Men typically arent as enthusiastic about these things as we are. My DH was set on our baby boys name since the day he saw how devestated I was when my grandfather passed. He right away wanted to name him after my grandpa.
Dont read too much into that stuff...they are hard wired to think differently than us. We are planners. They are fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants-ers. Im sure when it comes closer to baby time he will get into it. But they arent experiencing what we are right now.
Good luck hun

 

[October2013]

I had to ask my OH about this because its personally something I couldn't and wouldn't tolerate. He says if its a rare occurrence for him to do this...then just let it slide basically. But, if he has a habit of being this inconsiderate then that's when you have to really look hard at the relationship because that's a sign he's not into this relationship as much as you are.

Big hugs darling

I agree with Mrs.Mcguin as well as her OH. If its once in awhile...fine. I get texts all the time that I forget to answer...but always apologize when I get around to them. If its a constant occurance however...I wouldnt put up with it. Last relationship I was in was exactly that. Turned out he was too busy keeping up with and answering other women than me. Not saying your case is necessarily the same...but imo I wouldnt be ok with it.
As for names etc. Men typically arent as enthusiastic about these things as we are. My DH was set on our baby boys name since the day he saw how devestated I was when my grandfather passed. He right away wanted to name him after my grandpa.
Dont read too much into that stuff...they are hard wired to think differently than us. We are planners. They are fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants-ers. Im sure when it comes closer to baby time he will get into it. But they arent experiencing what we are right now.
Good luck hun

Very well said. And I just wanted to say that was so sweet of your guy to want to name your baby after your grandpa.

 

[sunnylove]

He sounds immature, but honestly so does the "omg he's not texting me back" attitude too. I felt that way at times when my DH and I were still dating, but I've never felt that way since we got married. I also feel like I know him a lot better. My DH is not a texter and he especially doesn't like to text about serious stuff. Some people are just not big texters.

 

[d_b]

I'd try not to get too annoyed.. Some men just don't get excited until they have a real, tangible baby in their arms. Like it just doesnt 'click' that a baby is coming.

Even after baby arrives, i have seen dads who become much more involved when their kid is old enough to play and wrestle with than when they are a newborn!

 

[rayne22]

You have a legitimate concern as to whether he is putting you and baby as a priority, however, I think you should tell him in person how you feel, and don't say "you go on Facebook and don't text me back!" Instead say "with this pregnancy I feel very hormonal, and sometimes I feel sad that you aren't talking to me about the baby." Then ask how he is feeling about the baby in general. He may be freaked out now that gender is confirmed and starting to keep his distance while he gets his head wrapped around it.

Whenever I need something from my husband, I always tell him flat out "I feel --- because I want to talk and you don't seem to want to." My husband doesn't have to play guessing games and things are resolved quickly. When I wanted to think of baby names, he would listen for maybe ten min and then switch the subject. I wanted to talk more so I told him so and we went back to thinking of names.

If you tell your boyfriend in person how your feeling and what you need from him, I would hope he would respond appropriately. Don't focus on Facebook-it's not about facebook-its about you needing to feel like your both on the same level when it comes to baby and how he makes you feel and that you need to feel loved, wanted, an supported.

 

[October2013]

So my bf never responded. He just got off work about 30 minutes ago and called me to tell me he was on his way home. He asked how I was doing and I flat out told him I was irritated, but didn't say why, so of course, he asked if I was irritated with him... I calmly, not bitchy at all, told him I was, because I texted him at 3:30 and never heard back from him (I didn't mention anything about seeing him on Facebook). At first he had no idea what I was talking about. And then he said, "Oh yeah. I got the text, but I was busy when I read it and I didn't know what you were talking about, and then I forgot to respond. Sorry about that."
I guess he didn't know what I was talking about because all my text said was, "Do you like Scout?" so I can see how that would be confusing to him. So since I figured earlier that he was just busy and forgot to respond, I completely let it go, didn't even mention Facebook, and got over it. The entire conversation about it probably lasted no more than a minute. The whole 'getting on Facebook and not responding to texts' remains a pet peeve of mine but at least we've avoided an argument tonight. I knew I was overreacting and it wouldn't solve anything if I had just bit his head off.

Ps. He did not like the name Scout.

 

[TwilightAgain]

Glad everything is sorted

Its a pet peeve of mind also. My OH is a Facebook addict so I go mental at him if I see he's been on and not replied to me, he always apologises and he does make more of an effort. Drives me crazy though because if I see I have a message from him i'll always 9 times out of 10 reply straight away or as soon as I can. He is really good at replying though, apart from the odd blip which he soon knows about

I usually say "thanks for pieing me for Facebook earlier", usually he'll say why and apologise, other times he'll get miffed and we'll have a little bicker but then its done and forgotten about.....

Men eh

 

[October2013]

Glad everything is sorted

Its a pet peeve of mind also. My OH is a Facebook addict so I go mental at him if I see he's been on and not replied to me, he always apologises and he does make more of an effort. Drives me crazy though because if I see I have a message from him i'll always 9 times out of 10 reply straight away or as soon as I can. He is really good at replying though, apart from the odd blip which he soon knows about

I usually say "thanks for pieing me for Facebook earlier", usually he'll say why and apologise, other times he'll get miffed and we'll have a little bicker but then its done and forgotten about.....

Men eh

Lol that sounds exactly like me and my bf. I'm glad I'm not alone!

 

[Nicolalove353]

I don't blame you for getting upset. It would be irritating if he didn't respond. But I do believe that people can be too busy to respond and then forget later. Us women like to make things huge in our head and them realize it isn't as bad as we thought when we found out what really happened. Especially us prego women! I think Scout is a cute name too! My fob actually helps with name picking but comes up with the craziest ugliest names! And he wants to make up a name that sounds like his, which is not happening! Lol

 

[mummy2be...]

Yeah that would def p**s me off!

I hate it when I whatsapp dh and he reads it and I know he's read it but he doesn't respond but then goes on fb, or what's app someone else etc. really really really irritating!

 

[Breadsticks]

My husband doesn't text much. He is known for it with family/friends too, if they need him for something they usually text me too so I can remind him of whatever it is

His friend even commented on how our text ratio is probably like 5:1 and how his girlfriend would be super pissed if he did that. But honestly, unless I need something from him I don't care, my texts are usually just FYI types anyway. If I ask him a question though, I do like an answer!

I try to avoid serious/important conversations through text since he doesn't much like it. Maybe write down names you like and talk them over when he comes home instead? Though I do think that since it means a lot to you that he responds that you should make it clear to him and he should try to respond more often while you understand that he will forget still sometimes.

 

[ama]

I would of been really mad too! And then if he told me he didnt know what i meant and got busy (on fb) id be mad all over again for him not replying and asking "what do you mean?" And leaving you wondering lol i think men just dont get it! I think you handled it so much better than i would of ! x