I just don't know any more

[Zipp]

Ah dear just a bit of a rant / ramble.

Just as the title says I just don't know what to think anymore, we've been TTC for around 5 years. I just don't know if I want to continue.
We have our own business which like most is struggling with the recession,
DH works really long hours 7 days a week. To add insult to injury my period is really painfull.

I would like a baby but I just can't decide if it's too selfish as the way our life is set up doesn't really leave much time for a baby and there isn't much room for change.

At the moment I just feel I can't take any more stress or pain and it's a 50/50decicion to go back on the pill. I just don't know!!!

If I was younger I would straight onto the pill, easy decision, but because of my age I know if I go onto the pill again that will mean defo no kids ever.

Agh I just don't know!!

 

[MrsF]

heya zipp you sound pretty fed up hun x x x

we've been TTC for the same amount of time and it really does take it out of you doesn't it - it totally and utterly sucks.

I notice that you said going back on the pill would mean the end cos of your age - can i be personal and ask why that would be? (you really dont have to answer that mate) if it does signify the end, could you access any grief and loss counselling to help come to terms with it before you decide?

cos i don't know much about your situ hun, I don't feel like i'm being much use! i hate to read posts where people feel so down, it's such a horrid feeling that i can empathise with (granted, i know everyone's situ is different, but that isolation feeling is just truely awful)

thinking of you hun, i hope you can find an answer x x x x x

 

[CurlySue]

Why don't you just NTNP? You obviously want a child or else you would not have tried for five years. Going on the pill means that you have absolutely no chance of achieving that. If you don't try but don't prevent you're leaving it up to fate. You're not going to stress about not getting pregnant but if you DID happen to fall then I'm sure you'd be delighted, too.

 

[moochacha]

I agree with CurlySue maybe just NTNP for a while until you get the TTC bug back if ever. Sending you a massive

 

[Zipp]

Thanks for taking the time to reply girls, I know it can be hard.
Still no decision!! The reason for considering giving up is I just don't think I can cope with the waiting game every month to then have with turn up cackling. I think I would rather go onto some form of contraceptive and get on with my life again and just accept it's not to be. MrsF I'm in my mid 30's and both my mum and nan had already went through the menopause by this stage so I know time is against me. Plus it would mean me going back to the start at the Docs waiting for fertility help.

Again thanks girls I really mean that and wish all of you big on your journeys.

 

[CedarWood]

I am guessing you have had kids? Have you always had painful periods and were they ever checked out by a doc? I would try to see if there is no medical cause first. Sometimes problems develope or get worse with age. There may be something fixable that has been causing the problem.
xxx

(I know we tend to see the world through our own eyes and hope I am not being too nosey here... But when I read your mum and nan had gone through the menopause in their thirties and you have been trying for 5 years... Well I thought it may be possible you have what I have... Celiacs disease. It is very common in Ireland - esp the western part and see you are from the northern but anyway. It causes problems concieving and early menopause. It developes at different times and different paces in people. I used to get pregnant and miscarry then did not get preg for many years. This was due to low levels of vits and mins due to absorbtion problems from the disease. I was also anemic. This may not be the case with you or your family but read up on it and if you think it sounds probable get a blood test.)