I just don't know. may be TMI. Sorry folks.

jodz1984

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" Hospitals, 2 different types of doctoring... if that makes sense.


Well, I miscarried last night. In the A&E at the SGH. I got rushed in, with heavy bleeding was passing massive clots. Once in there, I was set up with a canula for bloods, which they only used once. Was then taken through to sit in a waiting room, where I felt like I was passing more and more clots, had to keep going to the bathroom. I was getting more and more upset, the more I passed.

After that, I was taken to a little cubby hole in the actual A&E, told to change, and as soon as my jeans were off, I lost more blood and clots, and had everything dripping down my legs, and onto the floor. The OH went white, and yelled for a nurse. I basically sent myself into hysterics with the amount of blood i was losing. I had to change into a gown, and once that was on, was given one of these massive pads that they have there. It was filled within minutes. My OH (Nathan) couldn't get anyones attention, so I was sat in there, until a nurse came in to insert a cannula. Finally with a new pad, and cannula in place, i was shifted to another little cubby hole, about 3 doors down from where i was originally.

All of a sudden I needed to toilet desperately. I almost yelled at the OH to get a nurse to get me something to go in, as I knew I didn't need to actually use the toilet, it was more clots needing to come out. In comes a nurse with one of those cardboard toilet things, and as my pad was completely full again, and as I couldn't use my right arm to get off the bed because of the cannula, she cut off my underwear. Nathan and she lifted me up, and placed me on top of the cardboard potty.

Thats when I passed the baby. Once that had passed, I was handed another pad to keep between my legs, and sat back down on the bed. I saw the baby straight away. This little thing, and it even had eyes, and hands. So tiny. Yet so clear. I was handed some wipes, and when I was wiping, I said I had passed the baby, and pointed it out. Nathan had already seen it, and I think was trying to keep it away from me, the fact that I had passed it, into the cardboard potty. The nurse. She just got one of the yellow trash bags, and threw my wipes on top of it, and put it all in the bin. She PUT MY BABY IN THE BIN.

the bin.

After she had left, I just completely broke down, I was still passing clots, and nathan was trying his best to keep me sane, and to keep me going. I was in such discomfort, and having to basically sit in my own blood and clots. having filled pads, and not being able to get any help.

One more big pile of clots later, and everything seemed to ease off. No more clots were being passed, and I was able to get some sleep. Then the doctor comes in, all professional and business like, and informed me that it is a suspected miscarriage, and I tearfully and angrilly point out that, No, I KNOW I have misscarried, I saw the baby. Don't doctors and nurses actually talk to each other now a days??? As soon as I had said that, his manner changed completely to a more laid back and sympathetic manner. He aspologised, and said he was sorry for my loss.

About an hour later, about 2am, I had my blood pressure taken again, and was told that I was going to be kept in overnight, at the PAH across the road, and I was to be transferred to the hospital which is only over the road by ambulance.

Once I got there, it was a complete difference. The staff were nicer, and more sympathetic to what I wanted and felt, and I was treated like a human being, and was treated with compassion. The Doctor who admitted me was so nice, and kind. I was given my own room, so Nathan could stay overnight with me.

The cannula was really hurting me at this point, and I begged to have it taken out. Unfortunately the nurse said that she was unable to remove it in case it was needed to admister fluids later on.

I changed into a clean gown, and was helped into bed. Nathan stayed with me until about 4-30am, when we realized that he was the only one able to cover my shift at work tomorrow, opening and closing the store. He went home, and I tried to get some sleep. I think i woke up again at 6am, when someone came in to measure me up for these flight sock type of things, and then woke up again when the nurse tried to put them on my feet. I felt so bad, I almost kicked this poor wonderful nurse when she tried to put them on my feet ( I have REALLY ticklish feet) I fell asleep again until around 8am, when I gave Nathan a call to make sure he was up for work. He said he wasn't able to come up to the hospital again, as he needed some mroe sleep before being able to deal with the day. And I was okay with that. A little upset, but I understood, I really did. I fell asleep again, and the next thing I know is that I am being stroked awake by Nathan, he had heard how upset i was, and had dragged himself up to the hospital.

He sat with me until the last moment he could of been there until he had to go to work.

I spent the rest of the morning dozing in and out, and just sitting there. Around 11am, a nurse comes in and says that I have low blood pressure, and that the docs are going to discharge me. I agree, and ask to get the cannula out, as it was REALLY doing my head in and hurting so badly.

She struggled to get it out, as the needle had bent, and that was why it was hurting me when i tried to stretch out my arm.

Come 12 noon, lunch was served, and 30 minutes after that the doctor came into my room and discharged me. It was the same doctor that I had seen the previous week when I was bleeding heavily, and he expressed his sorrow at my losing the pregnancy. He was shocked at how things had progressed, and gave me his sympathies.

As soon as I was discharged, I rang the In-laws to be, and said I was ready to be picked up.

At the moment, I just don't know what to do. Its not sunk in, yet it has if that makes any sense. I am annoyed with the treatment I got in the first hospital, and so glad with the help adn support I got in the second.

Anyway.

Ugh I just don't know anymore.
 
So so sorry for you, wish you had received better care at the first place.

Take care of yourself xx
 
That is awful you should write to the paient liaisons to make sure no other woman has to go through what you have been through, you are so brave and hope you are feeling a bit better. You have been through a massive trauma you need to take you time to get better, and sounds like you have an amazing supportive partner and wish you both all the best in future and send lots of hugs. xxx
 
i am so so orry for ur losss hun :( i cryed reading that :(
am sorry likeee but putting ur baby in the bin is ridiculous :mad: i cant believe a professional did summit like that stupid cow

xx
 
Thanks, At the moment I am just all over the place. Yet I'm numb. I'm in one of those I just don't know what to do places. I'm starting to get a little sorer now, and have started passing a few small clots. So I think I'm gonna be stuck like this for a little while yet.
 
you poor thing i was very weak for a while I lost alot of blood nothing as major as you, take your time and don't rush back to anything x
 
You poor hunny, I just want to give you a big hug :hugs:

What an awful experience, and as for the nurse throwing your baby in the bin, that's absolutely shocking!!

I had a natural miscarriage on Monday night, I had been bleeding for a couple of days, my DH wanted me to go to the a&e but I refused as I wanted to be at home in privacy if I was going to lose my baby. As it happened I was home alone, which was very traumatic for me at the time. But at least it gave me the choice to save my baby's remains afterwards. We buried her in the garden the next day, and planted a tree. I'm digusted that you were not able to have this option.

I hope you're feeling better soon hun, your OH sounds like a great support xx
 
Jodz Im so sorry for your loss and what you went through. I had a horrible experience on Wed night where the nurse left the tourniquet on my arm for 2 hours with a canula in and my arm swelled up and bruised.

What happened with your baby is despicable, A&E is not the best place to be in your position, if they are busy, the standard of care is lower and they arent specialists in your situation. Its about time the A&E's were better informed on the fact that secondary emotional care is as important as primary care. I think its hard to slate the NHS because people are only human and their intentions are to cut off and factually save lives, thats their priority - my sister is an A&E nurse and she is very robotic about it, she says if you start to connect too much, she loses her own emotional protection by feeling over empathic to the patients as she an emotional person (which is why she started the job in the first place)

i think concentrating on you now is an option, get your partner to write to complain and you might be able to focus on grieving your baby totally, as you are your priority and you need to heal

big loves x
 
Hi, I had MMC 8th feb, opted for the medical management but only got as far as the first tablet as it seemed to speed things up and I started to miscarry at home, it was barbaric, my OH was fantastic, but like you, several hours on I was bleeding excessivley, was feelng lightheaded with the blood loss. which just seemed to be pouring (sorry tmi) and the hospital told me to come to A&E. I walked into A&E, a right state, blood was through towel, clothes, I felt soo faint- the waiting room was full and I had to stand at the desk and speak into a microphone to the receptionist (and the rest of the room!) - she asked endless questions, including "how far gone were you love?" in a nice happy voice!!. I was then told to take a seat!!

Thankfully, I did get seen straight away, a very smpathetic nurse took me into a comfy side room "for privacy". Thankully, it had leather sofas- blood everywhere. I was sorry for the poor porter who had to take me emergency Gynae - they had to line the wheelchair, it was that bad. I did almost pass out on the ward, but the staff there were fantastic, helped me change, put on bed pan etc as I had cannular in too. Six half hours after the start of the miscarriage, they removed the baby with forceps. The nurse and doctor involved were amazing, they warned me and told me to look away. The doctor, rubbed my knee and was so empathetic, whilst the nurse rubbed my shoulder and said " I have her safe- i will take good care of her for you sweetheart" as she took my baby away, in one of those cardboard kidney dishes, past poor OH who was behind the curtain at this point. They then let us have some time, before the nurse bought some soap and water for me to clean up and I stayed over night as they thought I had retained the placenta. (thankfully, I hadn't). The doctor then let me ask all sorts of questions including what the baby looked like (i couldn't have looked).

I don't think that night will ever leave me, it was horrendous, but we took comfort in that the baby was "born" in hospital and not at home as we had thought. The kidney dish was tough enough, but a bloody bin - WTF!!!!! You had horrendous time, hun. I have to say, the staff with me were amazing, the nurse even cried. They said, even though it is their job, don't think they weren't affected too. You must have had a real hard cow of a nurse.

My heart goes out to you, I can't imagine how you must feel. I find thefact that the baby was the very last to leave my body the hardest, but at least there was some dignity involved - you poor thing :hugs:
 
your post made me cry whyme, such a sad story, im glad you got the care you needed x
 

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