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oOskittlesOo
Guest
Thanks everyone. I know it's better to be alone . Ive felt like I would rather have baby to myself to love and give a good life then to let him do to the baby what he's done to me..
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annamom2011
Guest
Well done on deciding to walk away - you will be a strong mum and loving mum to your baby - you can do it on your own and you dont need violence in you or ur babies life.
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hollye
Guest
Ive been in your position, hun.
Looking back i should have left straight away, he was telling me he was in love with me and wanted to marry me after only a few days of knowing each other.
as the months went by he got more and more controlling, would hit me whenever i spoke to a boy, then eventually whenever i spoke to anyone but him.
Whenever i said i was leaving he would threaten to kill me then kill himself. he'd get all the stuff ready, petrol and a lighter and ropes and lay it out on my bed for me to see when i went upstairs.
if i went out it would just be with him and i wasnt allowed make up and he ripped up all my clothes except for baggy jeans and a tshirt and trainers. He'd feed me up on bags of chocolate bars a day to make me fatter so noone else would want me.
Whenever i did something he thought was wrong. (basically anything i hadnt asked for permission to do) he'd make me punish myself.
It lasted for about a year...one night i had enough and left and went back to my parents. i was still in love with him though, and we kept meeting up to have sex. I was that broken i just let him use me for sex. the last time i saw him was the night he got me got pregnant. it was the last night because he tried strangling me when we were having sex. I finally clicked and said to myself no more.
I have to go to his parents house soon with my parents to tell them im pregnant. if he's there, its going to be horrifying for me...
I guess all that shows that you can go through anything and get through it if your strong enough....just dont be silly like i was and keep going back. it will only do more harm. they never change! if you need to talk pm me because i know exactly what your going through xxxx
Looking back i should have left straight away, he was telling me he was in love with me and wanted to marry me after only a few days of knowing each other.
as the months went by he got more and more controlling, would hit me whenever i spoke to a boy, then eventually whenever i spoke to anyone but him.
Whenever i said i was leaving he would threaten to kill me then kill himself. he'd get all the stuff ready, petrol and a lighter and ropes and lay it out on my bed for me to see when i went upstairs.
if i went out it would just be with him and i wasnt allowed make up and he ripped up all my clothes except for baggy jeans and a tshirt and trainers. He'd feed me up on bags of chocolate bars a day to make me fatter so noone else would want me.
Whenever i did something he thought was wrong. (basically anything i hadnt asked for permission to do) he'd make me punish myself.
It lasted for about a year...one night i had enough and left and went back to my parents. i was still in love with him though, and we kept meeting up to have sex. I was that broken i just let him use me for sex. the last time i saw him was the night he got me got pregnant. it was the last night because he tried strangling me when we were having sex. I finally clicked and said to myself no more.
I have to go to his parents house soon with my parents to tell them im pregnant. if he's there, its going to be horrifying for me...
I guess all that shows that you can go through anything and get through it if your strong enough....just dont be silly like i was and keep going back. it will only do more harm. they never change! if you need to talk pm me because i know exactly what your going through xxxx
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oOskittlesOo
Guest
Omg hollye... Thank you for sharing.. Wow.. That sounds really scary.. I'm proud of myself too. I gave him the choice to see his baby if he can show me over the next 6 months that he can help and not just be there when he wants to be.. We'll see if he even trys.. There's another girl who he was messing with (who had been with other guys at the same time) who said he got her pregnant and he didn't try with her (just finding this out..) so I don't expect anything from him.
I'm glad you got out.
I'm glad you got out.
kittycat18
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Skye, I have read this entire thread and I just wanted to say that you are a very wise and brave woman. Domestic Violence starts as the smallest thing and just gets worse and worse until you find yourself struggling to escape. You need to speak to your mother or father or both and explain to them exactly what happened and what he said to you when you told him not to hit you. That way, they are aware of the situation and you can be protected from him in the future.
This baby is now the most important person in your life, not him. And you need to do every-thing you can to protect them from a violent or dangerous environment. Again I say, you handled the situation extremely well I hope your ok pet xx
This baby is now the most important person in your life, not him. And you need to do every-thing you can to protect them from a violent or dangerous environment. Again I say, you handled the situation extremely well
I hope your ok pet xx
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oOskittlesOo
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Thank you hun
UPDATE: I just told my two best friends what happened.. I told them if I go to them and say anything about him, him putting his hands on me, or anything else about him an me that they have to promise me to help get away from him. They said if I promise to go to them with anything they're morer then happy to help because they know I don't need to be around that and they've both been abused sexually an physically..
UPDATE: I just told my two best friends what happened.. I told them if I go to them and say anything about him, him putting his hands on me, or anything else about him an me that they have to promise me to help get away from him. They said if I promise to go to them with anything they're morer then happy to help because they know I don't need to be around that and they've both been abused sexually an physically..
xSamanthax
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I've just read the whole thread and well done hun! good for you for leaving him, you should be really proud of yourself, no one should have to live with that at all. Sending lots of your way
your way
kittycat18
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Thank you hun
UPDATE: I just told my two best friends what happened.. I told them if I go to them and say anything about him, him putting his hands on me, or anything else about him an me that they have to promise me to help get away from him. They said if I promise to go to them with anything they're morer then happy to help because they know I don't need to be around that and they've both been abused sexually an physically..
Your very welcome darling
I hope you are ok and I am glad that you have good friends that can support you x
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oOskittlesOo
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Being at school with them makes me so happy. I get so much attention because of the baby and it just feels good to hve them making me laugh
HarlaHorse
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You did such a good job, at least you got out and you and your LO are safe. Just don't look back, and if you ever catch yourself trying to, remember how much you love your little one and the nasty things he said and then ask yourself if it's worth it, it's his loss, not yours. You'll find someone that may not be the real FOB but will treat you and LO the way yous both deserve.
Message me on facebook if you ever want to talk.
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oOskittlesOo
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Aww that gave me goose bumps Skye thank you!! Really, it means a lot to know ppl care!!
thank you!! Really, it means a lot to know ppl care!!
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oOskittlesOo
Guest
Hey Hun. Yeah. He was over last night for some things. I think he plans on moving down with his parents so when he comes to get the rest of his things idk when it'll be.. He hasn't tried anything or tried to get back with me.
I would strongly suggest you contact the police. I'm not sure if you are aware, but if he fights you for custody or visitation in the future (and he probably will, realistically) then you will not be able to bring up any of the abuse that occurred in your relationship. No report, no record, no arrest or conviction = no abuse, in the eyes of the court. End of. So please consider this.
Getting away from him now is obviously very important, but you need to protect yourself and your child in the future too.
Getting away from him now is obviously very important, but you need to protect yourself and your child in the future too.
HarlaHorse
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That's very true. Sorry, I'm not trying to sound rude or racist in this next part, but Skye you said that the police pick on him their because he's dark skinned? So obviously they don't like him already, might help you if you told the police since they're already suss on him.
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