I promise, when I get my BFP.......

[cooch]

When I get my BFP I will not be a smug cow and rub others' noses in it. I will be so grateful and will not take my precious bundle for granted.

Anyone want to join in??

 

[AnnabelleMae]

If I will get my BFP I will happily accept morning sickness, I will not complain about back pain or any other kind of pain, tiredness,heartburn,nausea,headaches, and i promise i will be really nice to everyone around me. Good luck cooch and I hope you'll get your BFP soon.

 

[missymoon]

:I promise not to moan about any pregnancy related symptoms! I was thinking of promising not to swear during labour but don't think that would be possible..

 

[Armywife84]

I promise not to boast all over my FB about my pregnancy, fill up my photo albums with bump and ultrasound pics, and every status will NOT be pregnancy related. I know how it feels when I see all that..and just out of respect to the few infertile FB friends on my list.

 

[missymoon]

Ha Ha!! FB baby status. I often delete people I'm not really friends with who only put baby related status....my baby did a poo....my baby smiled....blah blah blah!!

I really promise I won't be one of those!!

 

[a1b2c3]

I would like to say that I promise not to moan about symptoms, but in reality I probably will.

However I will promise to be grateful for the fact that I am pregnant. I promise that I will not rub it in people's faces and I promise not to document every second of my pregnancy on Facebook. I also promise to change my eating habits etc (even more so then I already to have) to ensure that my child would have the best possible start.

 

[Sophe]

I promise not to litter face book with ultra sounds pics and pregnancey winges for the whole 9 months! I promise not to sit in the hospital waiting room opposite the fertility clinic and rub my bump and look smug!

 

[SpicyWolf]

I promise not to mention my pregnancy on facebook or send out baby shower invitations or birth announcements since I know how much those things hurt me to receive and I wouldn't want to cause anyone else such pain.

I also promise not to complain about any pregnancy symptom - I will appreciate and be grateful for every moment!

 

[readyformore]

I promise if/when I get my bfp, I will not go back to the ltttc or ttc forums and post how I was successful because I finally relaxed, ate pineapple, took extra folic acid, laid on my stomach after sex, orgasmed simultaneously with my husband, used preseed, etc.

 

[Jokerette]

Deleted by Jokerette. I'm sorry for offending with my post about Facebook.

 

[purplesparkle]

when I get my BFP I will be happy to cherish every moment of the pregnancy good and bad be grateful that this journey has finally got me to this place

 

[mg80]

*

 

[MariaF]

I promise not to flood FB with daily pregnancy related status updates. Its ok to mention some milestones like that scan went well or something. But I agree that most of my pg "friends" or new Mums ONLY post about them and bump or them and the baby.... I understand there's nothing else in their lives (or at least it does feel like it) but to me it also comes across as boasting...

I also promise not to give patronising advice to those still struggling. If they ask me specific questions of course ill be extremely happy to help. But generic advice like Oh, Clomid worked for or Ovarian drilling did the trick and so it will for you - that's pointless and can be quite diheartening because these things don't work for everyone.

I know I will also feel guilty for those still struggling because they have as much right to be pg as I do - so why did I get my BFP and they still haven't?!

And of course I promise not to complain about the symptoms - because every horrible side effect is just another confirmation that I'm finally PREGNANT!!

 

[Sophe]

I don't buy this thing about people just "sharing their happiness" on Facebook. Personally I think there is no need for it. Your true friends are people you would probably see in 'real life' anyway so they could share in your good news because they're in your life all the time. I do believe Facebook is mostly all about Top Trumps/Poker: "Oh I'll see your new house and I'll raise you a wedding...Well I'll see your luxury holiday and raise you a baby scan, read it and weep!" LOL! I deleted my account months ago, hooray!

It's a bit like way back when...before I got married, I was so sad that DH wasn't getting around to popping the question while I watched everyone around us get married. There was a girl on Facebook who updated her status about her wedding every day, to me it felt like a smack in the face and it really did seem like she was bragging about the fact she was getting married. It is possible to bridle all that "happiness" they have. I knew other girls like me who were dying to get married but it wasn't happening for them, so when I got engaged I vowed NEVER to brag on FB about wedding plans and things out of respect to those girls' feelings. I think even if it's not intended that way, it looks very "Oh look what I've got" and I find that kinda ostentatious and showy which isn't really something I can relate to. So in the same vein, I would never post scan pics/bump pics/baby tickers on Facebook out of respect for the feelings of other women who may be battling this horrible disease infertility. Instead, I will share my happiness in the real world with my friends and family, not to a bunch of acquaintances on Facebook. So I guess that is my "I promise when I get my BFP..."

Just my two cents

well said, I couln't agree more, all they are doing is showing off and boasting, and like you say you share 'real happiness' in the 'real world' I am not interested in trying to get an ex class mate from 20 years ago jelous or provoke colleuges by showing off my wedding/holiday snaps, I still have an account but i rarely log in and never update it, its just a load of BS if you ask me, and actually other people's babys doing a poo doesn't really interest me for some reason

 

[Jokerette]

Deleted by Jokerette. I'm sorry for offending with my post about Facebook.

 

[LizMcD]

This seems to have turned into a facebook-type promise thread!! I therefore promise not to re-activate my a/c if i get preg simply to announce it to the world.

Ladies i can see both points of view ref the preg announcements on f/book, as someone who has been ttc for over a year it's pretty hard to see these announcements regularly without getting upset, so my way of dealing with it was to come off it completely!

We can be happy for others, but sad for ourselves. The pain is unbearable sometimes. Equally i agree preggars women should appreciate their position 100% and not publicly complain about their symptoms - i therefore promise to make no pregnancy complaints (except maybe to my DH)!!

Jokerette you hit the nail on the head when you said 'Everyone has a right to get pregnant'. We do indeed, good luck to all xx

 

[MariaF]

I think we need to agree to disagree.

I think once a woman gets pregnant and gets past a certain stage (say, 12 weeks) she will start thinking and feeling different. Even if she struggled TTC for years. At the end of the day she IS PREGNANT. That's all that matters.

Whereas for those of us still trying - we still can't associate with that so all those non-stop pregnancy comments are just very hurtful.

Jokerette - I don't know how many years you were ttc, but please understand that until each one of us gets to where you are it just seems so unreal and unachievable. Im sure once we do get pregnant, we will change the way we think and may actually regret being so bitter about others posting their happy news.

But for now - this is just the reality x

 

[Sophe]

Wow I'm sorry buy I just totally disagree. In the months it took me before we got the BFP it never occurred ti me that the pregnancy updates I saw from people were boasting. I thought, and still think, that people are just excited. Sure they are thinking about themselves, but that does not mean they are doing it to hurt other people I thinknits really disheartening to think that people get annoyed with other peoples happiness about being pregnant. Would it make it better for you if the person posting her ultrasound pic had tried for three years? Everyone has a right to get pregnant and to enjoy that time and I really really don't think that when people post happy Facebook messages they are trying to rub it in peoples faces. . I DO hover agree that it is hurtful to see people post complaining statuses about their symptoms. I guess we will just have to agree to disagree... But please consider that the women are not doing it to hurt you, and I'm sure they would feel sad to know you were hurt.

Ok maybe we are being a little harsh and I am sure some on the face book posts are innocent... I personally hate the whole face book thing, it seems to me to filled with people who have a 'look at me attitude' and no matter what you say people DO compete with each and do like to show they are more sucessfull than the next person... I am not talking about pregnancey in particular here, but more face book, people use it to brag and show off!! FACT!! I even have friends who admit to doing so, and so many friends who have been offended/upset by posts... my personal choice is to stay away from it because i don't find it very genuine myself, notice how not so many people put unhappy posts on there!! I have some friends you hear nothing from when somethigns gone wrong they keep it very hush hush!! LOL

 

[rosebud_01_99]

If i ever got a baby ( i say baby instead of bfp because i had that before but always ended in miscarriage) i would never ever in a million years put one of those annoying baby on board signs in my car. ggggggrrrrr
rosebud

 

[SpicyWolf]

Wow I'm sorry buy I just totally disagree. In the months it took me before we got the BFP it never occurred ti me that the pregnancy updates I saw from people were boasting.

And therein lies the rub - "in the MONTHS it took..." Not only are you pregnant and rubbing our noses in it in this thread, but you dare tell us who have all suffered for YEARS - and are still not pregnant how to feel!!? Unless you have walked a mile in someone else's shoes, please don't assume to understand how they feel. Yes, I feel physical pain when I see those Facebook announcements and I won't for a moment be guilted into feeling bad or apologizing because of it. I didn't tell them they shouldn't be happy - I simply deactivated my Facebook account. I won't willingly inflict any more pain than I already have to go through when AF arrives yet again or when we hit another LTTTC milestone Because of that, I couldn't knowingly cause pain to another when someday we get our own miracle. No, it isn't logical, but the pain is real so please don't belittle what we're going through - the journey is painful enough without your help.