Kimi, I can relate very closely to you (and the other ladies here). We got the BFP aug 24th and m/c @ 8weeks6days after 1.5 years of ttc. It's not as long as you've been trying but I'm 37 and was diagnosed with poor ovarian reserve. They won't attempt ivf for another 3 months and if we make it to then without a natural BFP, it'll completely drain our banks and put us into debt.
The m/c was devistating, i'm pissed, anxious, frustrated and like you, feel cheated. With less than 10% of a natural BFP (according to the fc) the loss was devistating. Take a step back if you need to rejuvenate your spirit. Baby making shouldn't be a horrific thing as it is for many of us!
Saying all of that, I truly feel there's alot more to fighting infertility than we (or the docs) really know. It took alot of blood tests and $450 at a naturopath doc to find out that i'm very reactive to gluten (bread) and eggs. Being intolerant to foods can build inflammation which can stop you from hosting an egg. Inflamation wreaks havock on your body on so many levels. I also found out i have terrible estrogen dominance and moderately low thyroid. I feel great! Who would have known??? But this greatly reduces fertility & doubles the risk of m/c. I take Vitex & progesterone cream for the hormonal imbalances.
My gf's a nurse, she's always been going on about fighting insulin resistance, her BMI is like 20, she's the last person to worry about it (I've always rolled my eyes at her for being so picky & healthy). But insulin resistance hinders ovulation & contributes to PCOS! So even though i haven't been diagnosed with PCOS, I've smartened up & taken the sugar out of my diet (I use stevia) and supplement with L-Arginine as it acts like green tea, lowers insulin resistance naturally. To each their own but for not ovulating for how many years...now ovulating and giving the diagnosis the middle finger, it's been very worth it!
https://www.naturopathtoronto.ca/PCOS.htm
L-Arginine helps with ovulation:
https://pcosnaturopath.wordpress.com/2011/11/22/new-research-on-pcos-and-myo-inositol/
NAC prevents m/c and I'm going to try it next time (hopefully there is another double line). It's a great antioxidant (will fight cancer, prevent m/c and repair damage cells):
https://www.vrp.com/antioxidants/n-acetyl-cysteine-reduces-recurrent-pregnancy-loss.
I know more now and i'm finally ovulating naturally (roars of glee) but the waiting game is absolutely killing me. I can only offer you
and hope that you can feel free from the loss from the m/c.