Im a terrible person

Discussion in 'Twins, Triplets & Multiples' started by Kielee, Nov 13, 2011.

  1. Kielee

    Kielee Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2011
    Messages:
    908
    Likes Received:
    0
    Me and the OH have been looking for baby names this morning two of each as we don't know what the babies are until 16th Dec. Iv been thinking since and iv been in floods of tears at the thought of having two boys ( im convinced it's two boys).

    I really want a girl so badly and have always seen myself with a baby girl but not a boy. Im such a horrible person for being upset about having two boys that I feel im going to be punished with sick babies :(

    Please tell me someone else has felt like this :cry:
     
  2. bumpfortwo

    bumpfortwo Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2011
    Messages:
    216
    Likes Received:
    0
    i would stop thinking about it until the 16th Dec... as you never know you may well be having a girl!
     
  3. Kielee

    Kielee Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2011
    Messages:
    908
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks, I was really looking for support/help from the ladies on this forum as I have seen it with others who are struggling with various different things.

    Im guessing its just me then.... 31 views and one response I feel like the only person in the world who has ever felt like this. Its days like this that I wonder why I post for help and don't just keep things to myself.
     
  4. red mom2b

    red mom2b Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2011
    Messages:
    298
    Likes Received:
    0
    Just wait it out and see what they will be. I can't say I've felt the same way as you, but I too always thought I'd have girls. My mom and I have such a great relationship that I pictured myself being like that to a little girl. I found out I am having two boys and can't wait. I just had to adjust my thinking a little bit. There are lots of fun things to do with boys as well.

    Start trying to think of the fun things about boys... just in case. Otherwise, don't stress. You'll be happy no matter what once you see your little precious babies.
     
  5. twinmummy06

    twinmummy06 Slowly going insane...

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2010
    Messages:
    2,285
    Likes Received:
    0
    We knew early on that our twins were identical, and I was sooooo hoping for girls.
    I'm so ashamed even admitting this but I bawled my eyes out after the scan when someone asked me what we were having! I just couldn't imagine myself with two boys.
    But here I am, two boys and my daughter of course who I love more than the world. I blame alot of it on hormones back then for even thinking the way I did. You will love them no matter what, and you are not a horrible person at all :hugs:
     
  6. Kielee

    Kielee Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2011
    Messages:
    908
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thank you hun, iv been feeling like im the only person in the world who feels like this. My mum said that boys tend to be for their mummy anyway so not to be downhearted if it is two boys xx
     
  7. DippyTink

    DippyTink Mummy to twin boyos !!

    Joined:
    Aug 5, 2011
    Messages:
    545
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was convinced I was was having identical girls, so when i was told it was boys, I was gutted! But after thinking about it for a few hours, I realized that it didn't matter as they were mine and OH's babies and they are going to be perfect!
    The weeks have passed, and i am so thrilled that they are boys - i just keep thinking about having two mummies boys and how great it will be to not have to share my clothes, shoes and makeup, when they get older!
    You are not a terrible person, you are going to be a fab twin mummy, like we all are or will be! Twins are special gift and we are lucky to have them, no matter what sex they are!
    Hope you feel better soon :hugs:
     
  8. _Vicky_

    _Vicky_ Mum to twins

    Joined:
    May 22, 2009
    Messages:
    7,767
    Likes Received:
    0
    Awwww big hugs - I didnt have any kind of gender expectation tbh but didnt want to read and run.

    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  9. bumpfortwo

    bumpfortwo Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2011
    Messages:
    216
    Likes Received:
    0

    i said wait for the scan as you can often surprise yourself with emotions towards gender, when you actually find out you may have very different feelings. i wanted a girl but found out i was having 2 boys and actually by the end of the scan looked at all the positives and fun parts of having boys (already have a son) and am now over the moon and not bothered about a girl at all. that all happened by watching them on the scan and thinking about if differently...
     
  10. Mea

    Mea Mum to 3 miracles.

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2010
    Messages:
    913
    Likes Received:
    0
    I desperately wanted a girl when I found out we were having twins, and I was lucky enough to get one but like someone else said she is 100% a daddy's girl and I don't get a look in if dad is around!!! Where my little boys always want their mummy!!!
     
  11. chan8180

    chan8180 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2010
    Messages:
    269
    Likes Received:
    0
    In only ever imagined myslef with girls, love girly girls so was over the moon when i had my daughter and only wanted a sister for her due to the fact i had three and am very close to mine. Now however after having a stroppy, headstrong little madam for 3 years give me boys anyday lol! No seriously i love my boys to bits, would'nt change it for the world and have to admit i am a little softer than i was with my daughter with them:blush:, must be a mummy boy thing as they do definitely melt your heart.
     
  12. fuzzylu

    fuzzylu Twin mum & NPNT

    Joined:
    May 9, 2009
    Messages:
    634
    Likes Received:
    0
    I hate to admit it but I really wanted at least one of my twins to be a girl. when we found out it was boys I was quite disapointed but it didnt take me long to get used to the idea and then to look forward to meeting my little men. I dont regret for a second having boys now and they are both real mummys boys.
    I do still reallly want a girl though and hope one day i will have one but will only try for one more as I dont want more than 3 children even if they are all boys. (would love them just as much)

    dont worry too much about it untill you find out the sex.

    xx
     
  13. apple84

    apple84 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2009
    Messages:
    9,143
    Likes Received:
    0
    :hugs: you are not alone. I already have an amazing little boy and the twins will be our last children, so I was really really hoping for at least one girl. I was worried that I'd be horribly disappointed with 2 boys. Luckily I never had to find out as I'm having 2 girls!

    I don't know if it helps, but if your twins are fraternal your chance of at least one girl is 75%! that's pretty good odds.

    :hugs:
     
  14. Alwilan

    Alwilan Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2011
    Messages:
    487
    Likes Received:
    0
    When I had my eldest, i sobbed for days when i found out he was a boy, however since him, i have hoped for boys each time. Then when we found out our twins were girls, we were gutted. Everyone else was so happy, but it took us a couple of weeks to get our heads around it. Don't worry x you will love your babies whatever, and its why i think gender scans are a great idea, if you have preferences, it gives you time to come to terms. I could almost guarantee if you do have 2 boys, by the time you give birth, you wouldn't want it any other way. X
     
  15. genies girl

    genies girl Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2009
    Messages:
    2,240
    Likes Received:
    0
    I always thought I'd be a mum of boys when we found out it was non identical twins we got greedy and wanted one of each ! I was disappointed when the scan said they were both the same but I wouldn't change a thing about my girls ! Well done for being honest youll be fine x
     
  16. carolinaw

    carolinaw Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 2, 2011
    Messages:
    60
    Likes Received:
    0
    I like girl, too. I would like to dress my daughter like a princess. But my hubby want a prince. If I had a boy baby, will he hate me because I want a girl since he grows in my belly? Kielee, you know, you are not the only terrible mom. Me, too.
     
  17. wondertwins

    wondertwins Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2011
    Messages:
    1,965
    Likes Received:
    0
    I think having gender expectations is pretty common. But I also think it's pretty easy to get over them when you start to imagine all the good things associated with the other gender. I have an 11 year old DS, so I had hoped for at least a little pink this time. I wanted to buy cute little girl clothes and have a little princess. But we're all blue. After I learned they are both boys, it only took me about a minute to wrap my brain around all the good things that will come from my being the only girl in a house full of boys who all adore their mama. ;) At this point, I couldn't imagine it any other way.

    As for names.... don't sweat it until you know. :flower:
     
  18. Kielee

    Kielee Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2011
    Messages:
    908
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thank you everyone you are a huge help :) xx
     
  19. xgem27x

    xgem27x Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 28, 2009
    Messages:
    1,764
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was convinced I was having twin boys, but I think that is because I wanted two boys and had got it into my head!

    Then when I was on the way to my gender scan, it suddenly hit me "Oh god, it could not be two boys, one of them could be a girl... thats ok though, I will still have a boy.... OH CRAP WHAT IF ITS TWIN GIRLS!!!"

    I literally freaked when I got to the scan, because I wanted two boys so much, that I honestly think I would of cried if it was 2 girls!!

    ....luckily I had TWIN BOYS!! But yes, I know that feeling of wanting a certain gender, and that fear that you will be disappointed if you dont get what you want!

    But at the end of the day, no matter what you have, you will love it unconditionly, you may think you want a girl and cant connect with a boy, but how do you know if you have never had a boy?!?! :shrug:
     
  20. chetnaz

    chetnaz Have 3 boys + girl on way

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2010
    Messages:
    3,380
    Likes Received:
    0
    You may feel like this now, but believe me any dissapointment will fade when you set eyes on your babies and you will fall in love with them, no matter what their gender. I have three boys, a five year old, and the twins. I have to admit that when I got pregnant with the twins I was hoping for a girl, but when I found out I was carrying identical twins and I found out the risks about carrying id twins - any sort of gender preference went out of the window. I just wanted my babies to be born safe and healthy. Yes a little part of me was a little dissapointed when they told me that they were boys, but it didn't last long. You adjust to the idea and you love them no matter what. Now, I wouldnt change them for anything. They are 100% mummy's boys and my DH is jealous of all the kisses and hugs I get, while he just gets ignored! :) Dn't worry hun, the feeling will pass and you dont even know what you're having yet, so no point stressing over it.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice