Im Back :)

[MrsBeckett]

Hi Everyone I'm back after 7 Years!!
So a lot has changed!!
I first joined this when I was pregnant with my first child, Myla Rose born 30/10/08 a healthy baby girl born 9:18am weighing 6lb 12! I then went on in my rocky relationship to have a little chubby boy born Joshua James 17/06/11 12:23pm weighing an impressive 9lb 6!
I stayed with their dad through all the ups and downs (mostly downs). We broke up several times and then summer of 2015 I went to stay with my eldest brother as we do every summer, I saw the brighter life and the children were so happy and so content and I finally saw it, I was happy wow He couldn't stand this new happiness I had found and I was due to go back to my home (he didn't live with me he lived with his parents so we hardly see him anyway) right so I was due to go home on the Monday, but on the sunday evening I received a text saying that he wasn't happy in our "relationship" he couldn't see us progressing any further in what we had and that I was to move on and lead a happy life. OK I thought this time I was not to get upset (Let me just add!! 2 days before Christmas 2013 he ended things via text and I spent a year crying over him I was miserable, he moved on and yet I still took him back) so I was not going to spend the next year of my life being miserable and having the children see me like that again. So I went home and began living life as ME again....
I joined a dating app called Tinder, my friend had been bugging me to start getting myself out there again seeing as I wasn't really surprised or upset by my childrens father leaving so suddenly, it wasn't sudden for me I knew it was coming but I'm so glad things ended as the next chapter in my life was due to be the third best thing to happen to me in my life!
PING! *Picks up the phone* NEW MATCH! Lets have a nosey! After hours of swiping left and right and becoming the most judgemental woman on earth by just reading a short paragraph and a picture to go on. Ooo he looks nice I'm glad I swiped right on him. As soon as I clicked on to send a message 'Hey Hows your day going?' - ok so not quite Mr Grey charm but hey it was a start. "Hey its going alright how about yours" and then from there the texting did not stop for the entire day, I found myself laughing and smiling to myself all day and by the end of the day we had exchanged numbers! On goes the mega texting and finding out every detail about each other. So ill skip the boring parts we met up fell in love and now we are engaged... a bit sudden? Yes but am I the happiest girl in the world YES. This is nothing compared to my last relationship we are the other part of each other and we cannot believe how lucky we are.
Now comes the sad part....
PREGNANT... What!?!? Oh no we've been so careful. What if he doesn't want a baby? This is too soon!! (before we got engaged) We had a night alone and I told him. He was over the moon!! So got ourselves mentally ready for a new pregnancy then the pains started and weeks and weeks went by and the doctors told me all was well. Then I lost our little one, to say we was heartbroken doesn't even seem close.
After healing and talking and talking and talking we decided that we couldn't think of any reason why we shouldn't extend our little family, I have two children 7 and 4 and he has a son George who is 2. So now we are beginning our 2016 TTC. Last month I really thought I was pregnant but then the dreaded RED DAY came. Lets hope for a POSITIVE start to 2016... see what I did there lol. Its my birthday 30th January and I'm due on 29th. I wont be sad if I'm not pregnant this month just trying to have no pressure at all.

Thank you for reading this mentally long post of my last 7 years of life. I'm so happy so please no NEGATIVE comments. Ive only ever had lovely comments off this site previously. Hoping its a positive year for all you TTC ladies and gents

Lots of love and kisses
Jen