In between... Waiting to try and Not trying not preventing?

[LittleSesame]

Also posted this on 'waiting to try' but figured some of you here might have some experience with this as well!

husband and I have been on camp 'waiting to try' for years. married young, still have time I guess though everyone is catching up now lol!

We've been using the pull out method exclusively and successfully throughout our marriage.
Lately though we have gotten pretty sloppy and although DH still pulls out, he doesn't make an effort to get too far. At all.
This month especially, every time we BD'd I just got this feeling like were just pretending to prevent.

I've always wanted to go the 'not trying not preventing' route for a while before seriously trying and I wonder if I'm already there and should talk to my husband about it. Any advice appreciated.

Also bonus question, anyone get a happy surprise as a result of the pull out method? Would love to hear some stories.

 

[MrsLuckyCat]

I could have written that same exact story about myself, except I was on bc up until last December. We've been using pull out since and no "whoopsie babies".

We would be thrilled to get pregnant but neither of us is ready to say that we're actually trying. I'm suppose I'm just hoping for one of those happy surprises.

I figure we'll actually try or at least stop pulling out soon!

 

[Wishing_]

I'm waiting for my guy to say we could start trying! We are also using the pull out method, but lately dtd has been getting dangerous. lol.

 

[CanadianMoose]

Kinda in the same boat dear, except not the pull out method more the "calculating O days and avoid penetration" method. We've been married since June and I guess it's pretty early to start trying for a kid. Although, we are both a bit old and want 2 before he gets to 40 (only 3 years away.)

Also, due to my surgery when i was young, I only have a few fertile years left (one ovary and FT). We've been on this method for a year and it's pretty much worked except a few times when he was like "Ah screw it, if it happens it happens." In which I got pregnant and MC, and since then he's been a bit more cautious.

It's hard to decide when to "try" and by what that means, but I think every couple and situation is different. I guess what it comes down to is what do you both want and try and communicate your desires but be respectful of your partner's/husband's wishes too. Try to come to a compromise that works for both, but also keep in mind the reality of your situation, can you afford to actually be pregnant and are you prepared to raise a child.

Then again sometimes he just wants to try without telling you so you don't get all stressed and obsessed with trying, and crushed if it doesn't happen. Our husbands/Partners love us ladies, and some times seeing us crushed negative after negative is heartbreaking for them as well and they don't want that stress on top of everything else. So let them decide if they want to pull out/bust a nut/ or avoid the O days. You let them know what you want and your ready and they'll slyly let us know when they are by their actions....that's just how men are.