Is he STTN? The dreaded question >:(

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by Palestrina, Nov 15, 2011.

  1. Palestrina

    Palestrina Well-Known Member

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    Why is it that the first question anyone asks me is "is he STTN?" If I tell you that he is STTN does that make him a good baby? If I tell you that he wakes up a few times to eat does that make me a bad mother? I really hate this question.

    I know that STTN is like the holy grail of motherhood but I simply have no expectations that my baby will STTN. And why should he? It's perfectly normal behavior for a baby to wake up. I hate it when people compare their baby to my baby and say "oh mine slept through the night from day 1" as if that means something good. Personally if my baby STTN from day 1 I'd be concerned.

    Sorry for the rant, I'm just so sick of people holding babies to adult standards. Babies cry, that doesn't make him a bad baby. Babies need to be comforted, that doesn't make me a bad mother. Babies wake up at night sometimes, that doesn't mean I'm not making enough milk for him.
    :growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad::growlmad:
     
  2. cheese lover

    cheese lover Happy mom of 1

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    drives me crazy too! She'll STTN when she's ready to and no earlier.
     
  3. lovelylaura

    lovelylaura 3 little girls

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    i know its like a huge competition , im fed up of it and struggle to talk to any one else with a baby near mines age it just drives me mad x
     
  4. Louppey

    Louppey Mummy to 2 girls <3

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    :hugs:

    Thank you!!!!!

    I'm so pig sick of people asking me this, and me saying "no" only for them to look at me like I am a shit mother who is doing something wrong and say "oh my baby sttn from x many hours/days/weeks old" :growlmad:

    Somehow it's even worse when it's followed by advice on how to get them to sttn. Yeah I tried all that. Fuck off and stick your crap advice up your well rested arse.

    OK rant over sorry :blush:
     
  5. Kelly81

    Kelly81 Well-Known Member

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    I hate this! What makes me really mad is when my cousin asks me, her four year old ends up in her bed every night and her one year old wakes up about four times; my LO is only up once!
     
  6. SazzleR

    SazzleR Well-Known Member

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    Don't even get me started on the STTN question. Grrr! I hate the looks I get when I say 'no', like I'm doing something wrong or he's naughty for waking up. What do people want you to do? Ignore their cries? Not feed them? Not go in & give a cuddle & some reassurance. I'd love a solid 8 hours of sleep. I miss sleep! lol But I didn't have a baby so I'd get lots of sleep. One night I'm sure he'll just go to bed & surprise me. But until then mummy will keep on getting up.
     
  7. tina3747

    tina3747 Mummy of 2 gorgeous boys!

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    Everyones shocked at my 6 month old still feeding every 3 hours in the night! Trust me guys I'm not choosing this situation!!

    Everyone has advice for me but nothings worked, he eats hardly anything in the day but scoffs all night!

    So yes it pisses me off!!
     
  8. ginny

    ginny Well-Known Member

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    I can count on one hand the number of times Dan has STTN and he's 9 months old, I am with you on this one. There's nothing I can do, I've tried everything and to be honest, I feel much better in myself if I just let it go! People bug me when they look at you like you're crazy because he doesn't STTN but I've come to a point where I think I have two months of mat leave left and Im not going to worry anymore, I just want to enjoy what precious time I have left :thumbup:
     
  9. StarlitHome

    StarlitHome Tropigoth Mama to Two

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    Yeah. This. What the heck - my daughter is 11 weeks old today and the most common question I get is, "Is she a good baby, does she sleep through the night?"
    So... If she doesn't sleep through the night, she's a "naughty" baby? Seriously??
    :growlmad:
     
  10. Jem88

    Jem88 Guest

    My LO has just turned 9 months old, and doesn't STTN - she's actually done it once at around 6 months old and i've no idea why or how? as she's never done it since lol. I guess she'll just sleep when she's ready too. :)
     
  11. HungryHippo

    HungryHippo Domestic Engineer

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    I have the opposite problem with my parents. Told them LO had been STTN for the past few weeks and they didn't believe me. When she wasn't STTN my parents blamed it on the fact that we swaddled LO. Now that she is STTN they don't believe me. I can't win either way. It can certainly be an annoying topic of discussion!
     
  12. Itsychik

    Itsychik Well-Known Member

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    This is also one of the first questions people ask me, but I never got the impression that it was a reflection of me/my baby no matter what the answer was. When he wasn't STTN people just kind of looked at me with pity :haha: when he started STTN people started telling me how lucky I am. I didn't feel judged either way though :shrug:

    I do think it's funny though that it's one of the first questions people ask!
     
  13. tiggerpony

    tiggerpony Well-Known Member

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    I'm lucky in the fact my 14 week old has STTN from 9-7 without waking once from 5 weeks okld...however it does annoy me that people ask the Q cos when I say yes sometimes I get dissapointed looks! Or, "oh must be a sleepy baby then" - no she isn't sleepy shes wide awake during day and demands all my attention! IMO STTN has its down sides - she hardly naps in the day (which is why I think she STTN) and as said above, she demands all my attention so nothing ever gets done! lol.
     
  14. BrokenfoREVer

    BrokenfoREVer Goth Mummy (:

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    My mom seems to think that if a baby isn't STTN from 3/4+ thier hungry & you should cram them full of rusks or wheatabix & milk so they have a full tummy & sleep for longer....

    Have you seen a 3/4 month old babies torso? Its tiny & full of the same organs as an adult...but SMALLER! So he will get hungry quicker.

    Plus...what difference does it make if they do or don't STTN. No-one but mummy has to deal with it anyway.
     
  15. Palestrina

    Palestrina Well-Known Member

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    I just think it's a silly question. Like asking if a dog barks. It's a dog, it's going to bark - some bark more and some bark less. But they all bark. Same thing with babies, they cry, they sleep, they don't sleep etc.
     
  16. kaths101

    kaths101 Well-Known Member

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    yeah im with you, im sick of hearing from my mother he should be STTN by now!! why? Hes perfectly fine, we both sleep well and he gets up 2/3 times a night, feeds and goes back to sleep - so what!! arggggh

    Also keep getting told I should stop breast feeding by several people - that'll make him STTN!! :nope:
    I feel like screaming I dont care - I dont expect my 11 week baby to sleep through, I dont care yours has since 3 weeks, as long as he is STTN by the time he is 10 thats fine by me - I can live with that!!

    Thanks for letting me vent!
     
  17. BabaPu

    BabaPu Well-Known Member

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    I get asked this all the time - it's so frustrating. My lo has sttn from maybe 20 weeks and when told this the response is "ah you must be doing something right?" Erm, well, not really, one night he just decided to sleep through and has done ever since (give or take the odd night). The next baby may not sttn til he leaves to go to University - would this mean that I'm therefore doing something wrong :dohh:
     
  18. Lilly12

    Lilly12 Mommy & #2 on board

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    I have started saying yes she does.
    Just to shut them up.

    In all reality she wakes every freaking hour of the night, but I'm too frustrated and exhausted to hear other peoples opinions on this so yes, yes she sleeps through the night wonderfully.
     
  19. BabaPu

    BabaPu Well-Known Member

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    :haha:
     
  20. kaths101

    kaths101 Well-Known Member

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    I think i might start doing this!! then my mother will find something else to moan about no doubt!!
     

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