Is it normal to not have time for anything?

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by Disneygrl, Oct 4, 2013.

  1. Disneygrl

    Disneygrl Well-Known Member

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    My lo is 2 weeks old. My DH works,so for now, I stay t home with my little girl. First,she doesn't sleep at night for more than 2 hours, during the day she naps for maybe 30 min blocks, every few hrs. She wants to eat all the time, which I'm dealing with oversupply. Then, she obviously needs changing, baths, etc. I barely have time to eat and I shower when dh gets home but I'm rushed bc DH gets nervous with her..ugh. Soive been sitting home, on the couch all day. Let alone healing from tears and back pain. Any advice? Should it be this hard?
     
  2. minties

    minties Complete

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    It's horrible at first. It DOES GET BETTER. It must do or no one would go back for seconds.
     
  3. Lawgirl

    Lawgirl Well-Known Member

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    This is completely normal. I spent the first 4 or 5 weeks sat on the sofa, doing nothing but feeding and cuddling I barely had the opportunity to eat or drink. Let alone anything else. But trust me, it DOES get better. You will develop a sort of routine and she will still start being more than just an eating, pooping, sleeping machine. My LO is now 10 weeks and smiles and coos - it makes everything worthwhile.

    Once you feel up to it, try to leave the house once a day, even if you are tired. It makes a big difference.
     
  4. ruby09

    ruby09 Well-Known Member

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    The beginning is always the hardest. Don't worry, it def gets better. I remember when my lo was first born I barely knew what end was up, and I certainly had no extra time to do anything. But the older he got the more we were able to settle in on a routine, which made things much better.

    You and your baby are just getting to know each other, so it will just take a little bit of time to adjust. If you feel yourself getting very sad though, make sure you mention it someone. Anyone can develop PND, so keep an eye out for the warning signs.

    Congrats on your lo, and I'm sure you're doing a wonderful job! :flower:
     
  5. PrincessLeah

    PrincessLeah Well-Known Member

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    It's completely normal. Big hugs to you. But I promise you it does get better - and yes, I was ready to punch the next person who said that to me at around the 3 week mark.
    Every week will get a little easier. You will become more skilled and confident at being a mum. Your LO will slowly sleep for longer as the weeks pass. You will come out of the tunnel and the sleep deprivation will wane. It will still be there, but not as severe as right now.
    I used to come to Baby Club for a browse and be seriously gobsmacked how anybody actually had the time to post anything. Getting showered and dressed in the mornings was one of the hardest things. I used to take my LO into the bathroom with me in her little chair, and pop her down so she could see me showering. It didn't always work but I gave it a go.
    My top tips : I remember how hard it would be in the mornings. Somehow I used to make a super fast sandwich with my breakfast and sling it in the fridge for lunchtime. Otherwise the day would accelerate so fast and by lunchtime I didn't have a prayer getting myself anything to eat.
    Sod the housework. I know how hard it can be to sit on the sofa with the baby and look around you at the mess. This is something I really struggled with, as I am very house proud. But really, just leave it. Do as little as you can. You need to look after yourself now, and rest as much as you can.
    Try and get your handbag and nappy change bag stocked up the night before. So when it's time to go out during the day, and your brain is all over the place, all you have to do is grab your bags and the baby, and you're off and out the door.
    Get out of the house for a walk everyday. Even if it's just a walk around the block with the pram. It will ease your exhaustion, and is guaranteed to get LO off for a nap. You will feel better for it when you get back home.
    Good luck, you'll get there, I promise :hugs:
     
  6. LockandKey

    LockandKey Well-Known Member

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    my lo is 4 weeks and I am just now finding time to do a few things here and there, like cook, shower, or do laundry. The 1st month is always chaotic, especially if you are nursing, it just feels like you have a permanent seat on the couch all day long, but it does settle down soon, hang in there.
     
  7. mrstrouble

    mrstrouble Well-Known Member

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    Don't stress, it gets easier! If you're bathing her everyday you might consider cutting it down to a couple of days a week, with my baby bathing wasn't calming or part of her bedtime routine so it was just unecessary work since they don't get dirty lol. Consider using a baby carrier to help you multitask. And keep your head up, you'll fall into a routine eventually (and so will LO!)
     
  8. cat_reversing

    cat_reversing Mummy to beautiful V

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    sorry to laugh but hahaha... we've all been there and done it. I'm not laughing at you but at the general misconception many people, including me, have before baby is born, yes some babies sleep and just wake for a feed, go down well at night but most don't judging by many posts I've read over the last 9 months.
    It's a slog if baby doesn't sleep well but it will get better, doesn't feel like it will, I know, I didn't believe anyone either, but it really does get easier as time goes by.
    Don't be too proud to ask for help so you can get some rest or do your hair or whatever you need, we all need a break sometimes.
    good luck!:flower:
     
  9. Sparrow85

    Sparrow85 Well-Known Member

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    I would say the first six weeks are the hardest and 3 weeks is the peak of hell.

    I promise, promise, promise it gets better. I cried every day for around 3 weeks, felt like I had no life whatsoever and just seemed like I could never get a minute to myself.

    You do eventually get yourself in a routine and all this will become second nature.
     
  10. Scottish mum

    Scottish mum Well-Known Member

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    I'm sorry it's bloody hard eh my friend had similar to you. My lo was always asleep so I can't give advice but least it means your prepared fir anything unlike me, if lo doesn't sleep well one night I stress! I'm like what's going in!! X
     
  11. Cariad_x

    Cariad_x Well-Known Member

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    The first 6-8 weeks are so hard and then somehow you just turn a corner and everything sorts itself out. When my OH went back to work I spent all day on the sofa with LO who just wouldn't sleep unless he was on me. Dry shampoo was my saviour as I just didn't have time to wash my hair before Ollie would cry! I would get everything I needed for the day set up on a wee table next to me quickly - big bottle of water, snacks, tv remote, kindle and small meals. I was brutal for not eating at the start.

    Now it's great. Around 10 weeks Ollie got himself in a routine and I can plan my day around it. He'll happily sit in his Jumperoo or lie on the floor kicking his legs and rolling side to side whilst I do housework or eat. It's such an enjoyable time. I used to HATE it when everyone told me it would get better but it really does -just hang in there!
     
  12. cupcaker

    cupcaker Well-Known Member

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    Your in such early days, I found it to be that manic yes back then. It DOES pass and routines form. I'm 6 months on and compared to those first weeks, it's a dream now. It's been so much better for a while now. Deffo agree with PPs who have said you seem to turn a corner. At the time if feels never ending but when I look back from where I am now, it was a really 'short' period of time where it was insane.
     
  13. meli1981

    meli1981 D, me, and our crazy 3!

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    Normal, but itll get easier:hugs:
     
  14. rjm09

    rjm09 kcm12

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    Welcome to motherhood!

    I was a hot mess in the beginning. Pain from csect, lack of sleep as naps werent an option as i have a son too. Frustration. It got easier about 5 weeks when she started sttn with 7 hours. Slowly caught up on sleep, then sanity! Hang in there it gets better!
     
  15. NerdyMama

    NerdyMama Mum to two!

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    Yea I agree with pp's the first weeks are brutal. I did the same as cariad I had a TV tray next to me with snacks drink phone and remote. So when you do have 2 minutes to get up you just restock your table lol but it eases and then you're able to get more done and dedicate some time for you too. :hugs: welcome to motherhood. It's tough but sure is worth it!
     
  16. heyyydayyy

    heyyydayyy Well-Known Member

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    Others are right- IT GETS BETTER! What you're going through is totally normal. Also, you're probably not dealing with oversupply- your body is overcompensating right now but it will level off soon. My advice is to pump now so you have a good store of milk for later. Once your supply levels it can be really frustrating to pump (like, going from pumping 5oz in a sitting to .5 oz!) I know it's said over and over, but really do try to sleep when baby sleeps. Don't worry about anything else right now. You'll just drive yourself crazy if you even attempt to keep up with the things you used to do. Embrace being able to wear sweats and sit on the couch all day. Before you know it your LO will be squirming out of your arms and getting into EVERYTHING. Oh and congrats to you! :flower:
     
  17. Midnight_Fairy

    Midnight_Fairy New baby J

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    Yep. Lets say tea time, homework, uniform ironing and emotional troubles of my eldest two make my house a very busy place!
     
  18. Midnight_Fairy

    Midnight_Fairy New baby J

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    Week 3/4 was a turning point for us. Hang in therr x
     
  19. LDC

    LDC Well-Known Member

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    It's definitely hard, much harder than I ever thought it would be. Don't worry what you're experiencing is completely normal, especially while lo establishes a routine with feeding. Breast feeding is really hard at the start, but it gets better I promise. I considered giving up because I just felt that I wanted to cry with her demand feeding but there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you'll feel epic!

    I, not sure how much better your Los sleeping will get for a while, my lo didn't go for long periods until she was 9 months old but you get used to it and you just get on because you have to. Sounds crap but it's true. Then you'll naturally wake up all the bloody time to go check! It's Sod's law!

    Try and relax when having a shower etc, your oh needs to get used to lo and you need some time to chill out - I was the same, oh would have a half hour bath and I'd have a half a minute shower. It's no good for you though, you need a bit of time to freshen up and have a minute to yourself.

    Enjoy the lazy days on the sofa for now though Hun, trust me you'll want them back once lo is up and moving! I miss those cuddle days, they fly by.

    Good luck and stay strong you're doing fab!

    X
     
  20. ladybrock

    ladybrock first time mummy

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    First two weeks... Hardest thing ive ever done!!
    Im only week 4 and 2 days but things are much better already
    Hang in there
     

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